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Silence
Two
I stared at the hole in the fence. I could escape I thought I have nothing here. I could just leave…
I made my decision. I crouched in the grass, feeling a sense of de ja vu. My head went under the fence. Then my shoulders. Torso. Legs. Feet…I had made it. I was through. I stared at the stretch of forest ahead of me. I considered my situation. I had nothing with me. I would have to get everything from beyond the District. Food. Water. Weapons. I suddenly wondered if I was doing the right thing.
“Going somewhere?”
My head whipped around. It was Logan Golding. His fingers were laced through the fence wire and he was grinning. His reaping clothes were simple, just black trousers and a white shirt. He had even tried to look scruffy, undoing several of his top buttons, his shirt hanging loose from his trousers and the sleeves rolled up to his elbows casually. His usually neat hair was ruffled, and it somehow suited him. I understood his need to look under groomed. If he was chosen for the Games, he didn’t want to come across as the wealthy kid. It would definitely make him a prime target.
He had changed a lot since the day of my whipping. He was definitely a young man now, not a boy, and he had stubble on his jaw. He came across as less arrogant, but I wasn’t fooled. Everyone knew he was a flirt and a heartbreaker.
In the four years since the whipping, we had hardly spoken. To be honest, I had avoided him. He had, for a short while, tried to strike a friendship with me, but my cold attitude had eventually driven him away. From then on, I only really saw him at important dinners that I attended with my father at the Golding household, and even then he always had some girl or another hanging on his arm.
It suited me just fine.
“May I join you?” he asked, with what I think was meant to be a seductive smile.
“Do I look like I want company?”
“If it’s mine, yes.”
I couldn’t help smiling at his sheer arrogance. I turned away from him and began to walk towards the trees ahead.
“Suit yourself,” I called before breaking into a jog. I heard Logan grunt as he struggled under the fence and the pounding of his feet as he caught up with me.
“Wait up then!” he said breathlessly, “I’m not as fast as you are!”
I stopped and gave him a small smile “You don’t get enough exercise. Now leave me alone. You should go back.”
“So should you.”
“I should. But I’m not going to. Ever.”
“What?”
“You heard me,” I said. I thought fondly of the day of the whipping when Logan had said the same to me. He smiled, remembering too, but I knew what was coming next. A pep talk.
“Sit with me a minute. Before you ‘leave.’”
I scowled, but sat against a tree trunk, where Logan joined me several seconds later.
“What makes you want to leave here?”
I shrugged “What makes you want to stay?”
“My family. Friends. The food…”
“Girlfriend?”
“No,” he said with a frown.
“Well, anyway. My family aren’t great. They haven’t spoken to me in over a year. Since…well, they haven’t. Why would I stay for them? I have no friends, so scrap that. And the only decent food here is the stuff that I can’t afford.”
Logan grinned and fished in his trouser pocket “What, you mean this sort of stuff?” In his palm was a handful of Sherbet Lemons. He popped one in his mouth and then offered me one. I hesitated.
“They don’t bite,” Logan teased as I took one “What did you do with the last ones I gave you? Share them?”
“As if,” I laughed. It was true. I have savoured them for almost a whole year, eating one every month or so, and never sharing. I found myself wishing I had given one to Jonah while I had the chance.
“Do you miss your brother?” Logan asked me, as though he had read my thoughts. I nodded.
“Of course I do. Everything was okay when he was alive. Without him…I have nothing. That’s why I’m leaving. I can start afresh, somehow, in another District where no one knows me or my past.”
“It sounds to me like you have a death wish. Leaving here alone, with no food. You’re wearing a dress! How do you expect to keep warm? And don’t you know by now? You’ll be hunted down, hunted, like an animal-”
“Stop it.”
“Don’t you want to grow up? Get married, have kids? The Capitol will kill those dreams, just like your brother, you’ll be dead before-”
“I said stop it!” I screamed “Just stop it, okay? Don’t you think I’m scared enough as it is? I just can’t stay. Any dreams of mine…they can’t take place here. They just can’t.”
We sat in silence for a moment, and I was bordering on tears “And you know what? Today is the best day to go. The security is weak at the fence. No one will have seen me leave. I might have a chance if I leave today.”
Logan shook his head sadly “Remind me how old you are. Sixteen?”
“Seventeen.”
“Seventeen. I’m eighteen. This is my last reaping, next year is yours. We’re not going to be chosen for the Hunger Games. The odds are in our favour. After that? We have our whole lives ahead of us. That is something the Capitol can’t take away from us. Just stay, Raven. I promise you won’t be alone. We’re friends, aren’t we? You have me. Will you stay?” After a short pause he whispered “I can’t stand the thought of you in the forest alone.”
I sighed. I refused to look at Logan, but I knew he was watching me. “Alright. I’ll stay. But I just want to be alone for a while, okay?”
Logan raised an eyebrow “How do I know this won’t be the last time I see you?”
“I’m going nowhere. After all, as you reminded me, I’m wearing a dress.”
Logan smiled, and I did my best to resist smiling back. I still didn’t trust him. Not properly. He stood and brushed his pants off.
“Alright. See you at the reaping?”
“Sure.”
Before I could stop him, he quickly bent down and kissed my forehead. I blinked in shock and he winked at me. He turned to leave, but I smartly stuck out my foot and he tripped head first and landed on his nose. I smirked as he scrambled to his feet, a dark blush spreading over his face.
“Not so cocky now, are you?” I said, winking back. He rolled his eyes, but I knew he wasn’t angry. He turned again and began to walk.
“Wait! Logan!” I shouted. He swivelled to face me, now standing several metres away. “Why do you carry Sherbet Lemons with you all the time?”
His face split into the biggest smile I’ve ever seen “Isn’t it obvious? They remind me of you.” With that, he ran off and I didn’t have the courage to shout back to him.
I made my decision. I crouched in the grass, feeling a sense of de ja vu. My head went under the fence. Then my shoulders. Torso. Legs. Feet…I had made it. I was through. I stared at the stretch of forest ahead of me. I considered my situation. I had nothing with me. I would have to get everything from beyond the District. Food. Water. Weapons. I suddenly wondered if I was doing the right thing.
“Going somewhere?”
My head whipped around. It was Logan Golding. His fingers were laced through the fence wire and he was grinning. His reaping clothes were simple, just black trousers and a white shirt. He had even tried to look scruffy, undoing several of his top buttons, his shirt hanging loose from his trousers and the sleeves rolled up to his elbows casually. His usually neat hair was ruffled, and it somehow suited him. I understood his need to look under groomed. If he was chosen for the Games, he didn’t want to come across as the wealthy kid. It would definitely make him a prime target.
He had changed a lot since the day of my whipping. He was definitely a young man now, not a boy, and he had stubble on his jaw. He came across as less arrogant, but I wasn’t fooled. Everyone knew he was a flirt and a heartbreaker.
In the four years since the whipping, we had hardly spoken. To be honest, I had avoided him. He had, for a short while, tried to strike a friendship with me, but my cold attitude had eventually driven him away. From then on, I only really saw him at important dinners that I attended with my father at the Golding household, and even then he always had some girl or another hanging on his arm.
It suited me just fine.
“May I join you?” he asked, with what I think was meant to be a seductive smile.
“Do I look like I want company?”
“If it’s mine, yes.”
I couldn’t help smiling at his sheer arrogance. I turned away from him and began to walk towards the trees ahead.
“Suit yourself,” I called before breaking into a jog. I heard Logan grunt as he struggled under the fence and the pounding of his feet as he caught up with me.
“Wait up then!” he said breathlessly, “I’m not as fast as you are!”
I stopped and gave him a small smile “You don’t get enough exercise. Now leave me alone. You should go back.”
“So should you.”
“I should. But I’m not going to. Ever.”
“What?”
“You heard me,” I said. I thought fondly of the day of the whipping when Logan had said the same to me. He smiled, remembering too, but I knew what was coming next. A pep talk.
“Sit with me a minute. Before you ‘leave.’”
I scowled, but sat against a tree trunk, where Logan joined me several seconds later.
“What makes you want to leave here?”
I shrugged “What makes you want to stay?”
“My family. Friends. The food…”
“Girlfriend?”
“No,” he said with a frown.
“Well, anyway. My family aren’t great. They haven’t spoken to me in over a year. Since…well, they haven’t. Why would I stay for them? I have no friends, so scrap that. And the only decent food here is the stuff that I can’t afford.”
Logan grinned and fished in his trouser pocket “What, you mean this sort of stuff?” In his palm was a handful of Sherbet Lemons. He popped one in his mouth and then offered me one. I hesitated.
“They don’t bite,” Logan teased as I took one “What did you do with the last ones I gave you? Share them?”
“As if,” I laughed. It was true. I have savoured them for almost a whole year, eating one every month or so, and never sharing. I found myself wishing I had given one to Jonah while I had the chance.
“Do you miss your brother?” Logan asked me, as though he had read my thoughts. I nodded.
“Of course I do. Everything was okay when he was alive. Without him…I have nothing. That’s why I’m leaving. I can start afresh, somehow, in another District where no one knows me or my past.”
“It sounds to me like you have a death wish. Leaving here alone, with no food. You’re wearing a dress! How do you expect to keep warm? And don’t you know by now? You’ll be hunted down, hunted, like an animal-”
“Stop it.”
“Don’t you want to grow up? Get married, have kids? The Capitol will kill those dreams, just like your brother, you’ll be dead before-”
“I said stop it!” I screamed “Just stop it, okay? Don’t you think I’m scared enough as it is? I just can’t stay. Any dreams of mine…they can’t take place here. They just can’t.”
We sat in silence for a moment, and I was bordering on tears “And you know what? Today is the best day to go. The security is weak at the fence. No one will have seen me leave. I might have a chance if I leave today.”
Logan shook his head sadly “Remind me how old you are. Sixteen?”
“Seventeen.”
“Seventeen. I’m eighteen. This is my last reaping, next year is yours. We’re not going to be chosen for the Hunger Games. The odds are in our favour. After that? We have our whole lives ahead of us. That is something the Capitol can’t take away from us. Just stay, Raven. I promise you won’t be alone. We’re friends, aren’t we? You have me. Will you stay?” After a short pause he whispered “I can’t stand the thought of you in the forest alone.”
I sighed. I refused to look at Logan, but I knew he was watching me. “Alright. I’ll stay. But I just want to be alone for a while, okay?”
Logan raised an eyebrow “How do I know this won’t be the last time I see you?”
“I’m going nowhere. After all, as you reminded me, I’m wearing a dress.”
Logan smiled, and I did my best to resist smiling back. I still didn’t trust him. Not properly. He stood and brushed his pants off.
“Alright. See you at the reaping?”
“Sure.”
Before I could stop him, he quickly bent down and kissed my forehead. I blinked in shock and he winked at me. He turned to leave, but I smartly stuck out my foot and he tripped head first and landed on his nose. I smirked as he scrambled to his feet, a dark blush spreading over his face.
“Not so cocky now, are you?” I said, winking back. He rolled his eyes, but I knew he wasn’t angry. He turned again and began to walk.
“Wait! Logan!” I shouted. He swivelled to face me, now standing several metres away. “Why do you carry Sherbet Lemons with you all the time?”
His face split into the biggest smile I’ve ever seen “Isn’t it obvious? They remind me of you.” With that, he ran off and I didn’t have the courage to shout back to him.