Inexperienced

I couldn’t believe myself. I said yes to a boy after knowing him for little over a week. But somehow, I wasn’t upset. I liked my decision. Jared made me feel comfortable.

The weekend began with an amazing date with him on Friday. But it slowed into a boring couple of nights of being grounded. I was literally caged in my house. I practically lived in my room. I only came out for food. I didn’t bother to interact with my family.

On Monday, Jared showed up in my driveway. He claimed he felt obligated to drive his girlfriend to school. The word ‘girlfriend’ made my lips tingle. It was such a new word to say.

It really sucked to not be able to see him outside of school.

But I was lucky enough to get one afternoon with him.

My parents were going to a mixer for my Dad’s company. And Ella was staying with a friend. I’d have the house by myself for a few hours and there was no doubt as I let Jared come over.

We were sitting in the living room. He had one arm around me and I was leaning in, watching some movie I wasn’t bothering paying attention to. I wanted him to kiss me so bad. It’d been about a week and a half since our first date, and since our last kiss.

The entire movie I tried dropping hints but it was no use. Either he was completely clueless or he chose to ignore my attempts.

After the night was over, he gave me a sweet peck on the cheek and left me.

It was sort of strange for me to be wanting him so badly, but I couldn’t handle the nagging feeling that he wasn’t wanting me as much.

I knew I’d have to confront him about it.

And as soon as my grounding was up; that’s exactly what I did.

We were at the movies, seeing the latest action flick to hit theaters. Jared insisted on going. I took it as an opportunity to make my move.

But still, there was no way for me to try and get him to kiss me. He wasn’t paying much attention to me. Other than keeping his arm around me.

We were driving back to my house. That was when I got the courage to speak up.

“You don’t want me,” I said, breaking the silence.

He looked at me strangely. “What do you mean, I don’t want you?

“You don’t act like you want me.”

“Of course I want you, Austin. What gives you this silly idea that I don’t?” He asked, incredulously.

I blushed a little. “It’s been two weeks since we’ve kissed.”

He was silent for a moment. “That’s why you think I don’t want you?”

I nodded.

He erupted in a fit of laughter.

“What’s so funny?” I snickered.

“Just because I’m not all over you, doesn’t mean I don’t want you.”

I shrugged. “I guess I just thought you wanted that kind of stuff.” I blushed deeper. “Most guys do.”

He gulped. We pulled into my driveway and turned off the ignition. “Austin.” I loved the way he said my name. “I do want you. But I don’t want to rush into that stuff.”

“I understand.” I nodded. “I do. I just thought kissing was okay.”

“It is,” he laughed. And with that, he cupped my cheek and kissed me deeply.

It took awhile for us to finally agree to say goodnight. And I wouldn’t have had it any other way.

* * * *

The next day at school was one I was dreading. It was a Tuesday. Not anything special, other than it comes after Monday.

Before heading to lunch, I stopped in at the bathroom. One of the biggest mistakes I could have ever made.

As I was in the stall, I heard Mary Kade’s voice walk in. She was with two of her friends, most likely admiring themselves in the mirror.

It wasn’t that I was afraid of going out there and seeing her, not at all. But what had me waiting was what they were talking about.

“So, it’s true? You and Jared?” One of the other girls giggled.

“Mhm, he’s so close to being mine again. He told me last night was the best night of his life,” she squealed. Last night, Jared had to leave my house early for a family thing. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.

“Girl, what about that freak he’s supposedly dating?” asked her other friend.

She scoffed. “Oh please. He told me she was just a little charity case of his.”

The other girls laughed. “Well, let’s go girls.”

It was so movie like that I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. This never happens in real life, does it? I mean, you don’t just find out about this sort of stuff sitting in the bathroom. My eyes popped open wide.

Jared cheated on me. I was his charity case.

I stumbled out of the bathroom, barely able to walk. When I reached the doors of the cafeteria I froze. Jared was sitting at our table. It took him about five seconds to see me. He stood up and waved.

I shook my head, allowing tears to fall from my eyes. His hand slowly retreated and he gave me a puzzling look.

I turned around and began to walk down the hallway, towards the parking lot. I heard him yell my name.

I slid into a corner so he wouldn’t be able to see me. He blew right past me and I didn’t waste a second to leave the building and head for my car.

I was unaware of what was going on, other than making my way home and falling onto my bed, before crashing asleep.