Suspenders, Stripes and Pain Killers, Oh My

All eyes were on her.

I had put her on the spot.

She didn’t dare make any eye contact with me. She licked her full lips and shook her head.

“Amber?” I asked again. My voice sounded hoarse. I switched glances between her and my parents.

“I’m sorry Louis,” she finally said in a faint whisper. My heart fell. I had actually thought that someone would believe me in this.

“You too huh?” I pursed my lips and narrowed my eyes. I swallowed hard and shook my head. My fist began to tighten as she came closer to me. I stepped back as there was the same amount of space between us like before.

I wouldn’t hit a girl–or anyone in that sense–but I didn’t like the thought of her coming near me.

“Louis please listen to me,” Amber whispered dimly.

“What, so you can go and tell everyone about what I said? Then going around like you don’t believe me about it?” I snapped. She looked like she was about to crack a tear drop.

“Louis,” she tried again, stepping closer.

I turned to my bed and sat. I narrowed my eyes. “Just leave please.”

There was a pause before anything else. Everything seemed to be in slow motion. I didn’t understand any of this.

I heard their footsteps echo in the room. As the door closed, my tears finally erupted.

Again, I didn’t dare to wipe them.

I laid down over the sheets and looked up at the ceiling. There were cracks along it with its chipped paint. The sun light from my window came rushing in as I listened outdoors.

The birds did their normal chirping, the clouds looked rather beautiful the way they floated above us, and the leaves on each tree swayed blissfully.

I closed my eyes tightly as I bit my bottom lip.

Was this some kind of sick prank?

I hated it.

I can’t stop what’s already out.

I wanted to die.

I want nothing to do with this so called living.

I reached over to the table next to my bed and uncapped the round bottle. I placed two tablets in my mouth and swallowed fiercely. I ran it with icy water before I drifted to my nightmare.



“Lou?”

“Yes?” I shamelessly replied.

The cold rush came up my spine and down my neck. It felt like mini frozen kisses were being laid on me.

I began my search. I had no clue where I was, I didn’t know if I was alone, and I didn’t know if this was a dream or not.

I began to breath unevenly. I started to panic.

My legs moved constant beneath me as I felt the liquid trickle down my motionless face.

I squinted as I spotted it.

That endless dark hallway I’ve always see in my dreams.

“Help!” she called out. Her voice was still the same, but it sounded forced.

I did what I was told. I searched door to door, I followed her voice, I checked everything.

My legs were worn out, and I felt like collapsing.

“Where are you?” I called out in a firm voice.

She didn’t answer.

I woke up moist as always in my bed.

It was quarter to midnight. I felt dead.

I couldn’t feel my legs, my sides hurt, my arms felt like Jell-O, and my head ached as it throbbed.

I reached for the glass next to me and pressed it to my shivered lips.

Fuck.

It was empty.

I crept out my room and waited. I listened to the night as my breathing increased. The sound of nothing.

I walked slowly as I watched my every step. My hand gripped the glass near my side as it swung back and forth.

I looked down at my socks and realized that I didn’t put on my shoes. As I turned around, I bumped into a figure.

I gasped as I stepped back, not knowing what to do.

“What do you think you’re doing?” she shinned her flashlight into my eyes, causing me to cringle.

“I was thirsty.”

“That’s why we’re here Louis,” Amber placed her cool hand on my shoulder and started to pull me back. I shook it off.

“I don’t need your help,” I hollered. I started to walk pass her.

“Louis, listen to me. You need to go back to your room.”

“One condition.” I turned back and rolled my eyes. “Tell me why you didn’t believe me.”

“Look, can we not do this here?”

“Tell me.”

“I’ll tell you in your room.”

She sounded honest.

But I didn’t give a fuck.

I gave in and sighed. I turned my heels and led the way. I felt her eyes being pressed on my back as she kept her distance between us.

As the door closed, I immediately felt woozy.

“Do you need your pills?” Amber asked softly.

I sighed. “Just tell why you made me look like a freak show out there. Why didn’t you believe me?”

“I wanted to say what they all wanted to hear,” Amber sighed. “I needed to Louis.”

“So you go against me?” I asked, slightly hurt.

“Louis, you need to understand. Please.”

“I don’t need to understand why you couldn’t just help me out,” I softly pouted.

“Louis, I believe you when you say you saw someone. But the results–”

“The results are bogus,” I interrupted.

“The results has its own story,” Amber finished.

“What is that story?”

“That you have a multiple personality disorder,” Amber said in almost a shout.

I stayed wide eyed as she shook her head lightly. She still stood near the door as I sat on the edge of my bed.

“What?” I asked, shocked. “Why haven’t anyone told me this before?”

“Because you’re going under a lot of cement right now.”

“That’s not a valid reason,” I reasoned out. I sighed and pushed my head against one of my pillows.

“Are you tired?” Amber asked.

“No,” I said firmly. “Please go.”

Amber shut the door within another word. I turned around and placed a couple of pills into my mouth.

That, I fell into a deep sleep.