Reckless

Josh.

"You're late."

I loved hearing that just as I walked in to the studio from Ben, an executive at my clothing company. He was a genius but god he was obnoxious.

"Good afternoon to you too, Benjamin." I chirped back. "How is the studio holding up?"

Ben shrugged. "You know, the usual. But I have that one designer I want you to meet with in the backroom. She's been waiting for around ten minutes now."

"Look, I woke up late and then Abby-"

He held up a hand. "Enough said. Let's just get your ass to the meeting room, eh?"

Abby was usually an excuse for everything, and Ben excepted it majority of the time. I had met her a few months ago, and by some twist of fate, we hit it off. Abby was beautiful, probably the most flawlessly beautiful girl I have ever seen. A big reason why Ben and my band mates all accepted her as an excuse for lateness was because she was so beautiful. As in, she was entirely out of my league and everyone knew it. Even me.

"Tell me about this one."

Ben pulled up a binder on his desk. "She's new to the designer scene from America. I want to say she's from New York? She's at university there, studying design, but she really is a natural. Her designs have been going around online for awhile now, and I think we need to get her while we can."

I nodded as I followed him. "And she wants to work with us?"

"She said she was intrigued by our London location. I sent her a few pictures of the female line, and she said she would bring some ideas." Ben paused. "She's quite attractive as well, not that it matters to you."

As long as I had Abby, it didn't.

Ben grabbed the handle to a room on the left and pulled open the wooden door. I walked in normally, hands in my pockets and ready to get this over with so I could have a new designer and maybe have sex with my fit girlfriend who was waiting for me back home.

But the girl sitting at the desk was not any normal girl.

Her eyes locked with mine, and we both knew. It was those eyes-- I knew them so well, better than I knew myself, and I had to take a step back. My mind hadn't told me who she was yet, but I knew I knew her and I knew she knew me.

She was the first to speak. "Josh?" A slight smile crossed her lips, and I knew that as well.

"Lou." The words came out before my mind had any say. It was like my heart was speaking.

"Oh, you two know each other?"

You have no idea. I thought quietly along with a string of other thoughts. I knew this girl-- at least I thought so. But the Louisa I remembered had blonde hair with even blonder highlights, and she wore more accessories than I could count.

The girl in front of me now had dirty blonde hair, and she wasn't nearly as refined as I remembered. She looked more grown up. She looked more like Louie.

And god, she was beautiful.

"We met in LA while his band was recording an album." Louisa said, a sly but uncomfortable look on her face. "We met at a um, a club. Just briefly. It's nice to see you, Joshua."

Ben was taken aback for a moment when she called me 'Joshua'. Thank god Josh was made for business, and quickly brought the meeting to a better start.

"Josh, take a seat?" Ben said quickly. I'd just noticed I was standing.

I sat down as Louisa chuckled to herself. God, that smile brought my heart to a quick halt. I didn't think I would ever see or hear her laugh again, I thought she was gone. I had thought about this moment less and less, meeting her again, but it was finally real. I had no idea what to do.

"You have designs for us?"

Lou smiled again and pulled a sketch pad from her bag, flipping it to a page in the middle. "I drew up these after I reviewed your website. I think these would be good, and go along with the style- simple, but with a bit more of a sketch feel than the rest of yours have at the moment."

I took the book in my hands. This one was thicker than the one in her room.

Suddenly I realized it: Louisa was here. As a designer though, and without her mother, and apparently she went to a school in New York.

What had happened after I left?!

"These are amazing." I said as my mind reeled. "I like this skull pattern. It might be cool on a bag."

Louisa nodded. "Or a beanie, or something."

Ben pointed to her and smiled. "YES. And your text designs are striking."

"Those are the hardest, but ya know, they pay off obviously. Um," She paused as she flipped to page, her eyes flickering to mine and away again, "this is my favorite, it's one of the first text-based ones I finished."

The book turned back to me, and the word staring back hit my chest. With vines going off of it like a poison, centered in the middle of the sketch in a prickly font was the word always.

"This shirt would sell." Ben smiled. "Not to be hasty, but I think Josh and I are pretty sold. Can you stick around for awhile and we can collaborate a bit? Josh, we'll have to get your dad in on this at some point."

I nodded slowly. "Sure."

Ben eyed me. "You alright?"

"Oh," I snapped out of it, "I'm great. Yes. Louie, stay. I'll call my dad tonight."

Louisa smiled and shook Ben's hand, but I had already backed away from the table. I still wasn't sure if this felt real, or if I wanted it to. I was scared of every answer, and I couldn't think straight. Things hadn't changed at all.

"So you'll be in tomorrow?" Ben said as we reached the elevator.

"Sure thing!" Louisa smiled. "Maybe I'll walk around the city for a bit, draw some English inspiration."

Ben smiled. He was just as smitten with the girl as anyone would be.

"I'll walk you out." I said quickly, joining her in the elevator as Ben stood confused outside. Fuck, I had to think of a good explanation story for him.

As the doors closed, I realized I should have thought this "walking out" plan through. The ride was completely silent. There was so much to say and for some reason, I just couldn't say it. It all sounded good in my head but the more I thought about it, the more it wasn't right.

"How are you?"

Louisa laughed. "Nice."

I stared down at her smiling face, looking at me like I had just told a joke or said something completely wrong. It was Louisa.

"Hey, I'm trying to start a-"

"I know, I know." Louie laughed. "I'm good. I just flew to London for a job at my ex-boyfriend's company without knowing it, so I feel like kind of a dumbass. But I'm good."

I laughed with her. "Wanna know something crazier? I think I just hired my ex, so."

It felt weird calling her my ex. I had never referred to her like that before. Come to think of it, I never talked about her really at all. None of the guys did, and I'd never really told Abby. Up until now, it was like I had tried to forget Louisa was ever in my life.

That left a really bad feeling in my chest. I couldn't remember why I did that.

And shit. I'd never told Abby. Because I had a girlfriend. And her name was Abby. And I had apparently forgotten her completely upon meeting with those hazel eyes once more.

"I can't believe this happened." Louisa said, almost to herself as we reached the stairs to the Underground.

"I just, I never thought I'd see you again. And about what happ-"

"Don't." Lou stopped me, taking a step down and away from me. "You don't need to say anything. That was mess. But it's over now, and we're both here so I think it'd be good if we just moved on. Stayed friends."

Friends. I swallowed. "Right, exactly. I missed you, Lou."

She smiled. "I missed you too. I'll see you tomorrow. If you want to tell the guys I'm in town, please do it. I miss them like hell."

I watched her turn and walk down the stairs, my heart pounding in my chest.

It felt like someone had taken my world and personally tipped it upside down.