The Original Selfish Machines.
four.
May 17th, 2012
So you know how they say the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else? I took that route 2 weeks after our final falling out. I don't know if it worked 100% but it did something.
Jaime started texting me again since we hadn't really talked since our hookup in December. It felt like the perfect timing to see him again and I was genuinely excited. Here's the thing about Jaime, he's a really nice guy and can talk for hours about music and other shit but I lose interest in what he's saying and I just want him for sex. He texted me as he packed his shit, telling me that he couldn't wait to see me. I felt the monster inside me come alive as I replied with a devilish smile on my face.
you know the only real way to cure pain is to add a little more, because everything new distracts the old.
He came over and fucked me just like I wanted. It was great but afterwards I just felt terrible. We decided to watch a movie afterwards and I begged him to watch Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows pt. 2 with me. He bickered about watching it and said we had to watch something else. We settled on Fast Five and he pulled me close to him so that my head rested on his chest. I traced the Spanish scripture tattooed across his chest to try and get my mind off of how I felt.
It didn't feel right at all. Jaime in the spot where AJ was not long before him. I didn't want his scent stuck to my sheets, I wanted AJ's embedded instead. His chest, arms, and shoulders weren't made for cuddling like AJ's were. Halfway through the movie I complained that I was tired so he would get the hint to leave. His kiss goodbye made me feel even worse.
Once I was in my room alone, I began crying and texting Kylie telling her everything. I felt disgusted that I let someone else into my bed even though I wanted it. When I woke up the next morning, I felt nothing that I had felt the night before. The hunger was over and I was content as if I was Megan Fox in Jennifer's Body when she eats all those dudes. As the day went on I felt less disgusted and I missed AJ less.
sometimes the bedroom walls become my only friends, but they were there from beginning to end.
So you know how they say the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else? I took that route 2 weeks after our final falling out. I don't know if it worked 100% but it did something.
Jaime started texting me again since we hadn't really talked since our hookup in December. It felt like the perfect timing to see him again and I was genuinely excited. Here's the thing about Jaime, he's a really nice guy and can talk for hours about music and other shit but I lose interest in what he's saying and I just want him for sex. He texted me as he packed his shit, telling me that he couldn't wait to see me. I felt the monster inside me come alive as I replied with a devilish smile on my face.
you know the only real way to cure pain is to add a little more, because everything new distracts the old.
He came over and fucked me just like I wanted. It was great but afterwards I just felt terrible. We decided to watch a movie afterwards and I begged him to watch Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows pt. 2 with me. He bickered about watching it and said we had to watch something else. We settled on Fast Five and he pulled me close to him so that my head rested on his chest. I traced the Spanish scripture tattooed across his chest to try and get my mind off of how I felt.
It didn't feel right at all. Jaime in the spot where AJ was not long before him. I didn't want his scent stuck to my sheets, I wanted AJ's embedded instead. His chest, arms, and shoulders weren't made for cuddling like AJ's were. Halfway through the movie I complained that I was tired so he would get the hint to leave. His kiss goodbye made me feel even worse.
Once I was in my room alone, I began crying and texting Kylie telling her everything. I felt disgusted that I let someone else into my bed even though I wanted it. When I woke up the next morning, I felt nothing that I had felt the night before. The hunger was over and I was content as if I was Megan Fox in Jennifer's Body when she eats all those dudes. As the day went on I felt less disgusted and I missed AJ less.
sometimes the bedroom walls become my only friends, but they were there from beginning to end.