The Love You've Claimed Was Just a Whisper

Touring was turning out to be amazing. I had survived the first three days on the road. All the guys were amazing too. Porter was quickly becoming one of my new favorite people and Myles and Jordan were in heaven. Somewhere in Indiana I lost my paralyzing stage fright, although Jordan still quoted songs at me right before. That was about the same time where they got over being star struck. Josh and Myles had bonded over one thing or another. Jordan was bouncing around one idol to the next. Once Dillon Francis showed up though his attention would be fixed on becoming friends with him. It was all quite amusing. Joel still wouldn't tell me who was coming at the end of the week with Dillon. I had a feeling who it might be, but I also wasn't even sure anyone else was coming. It didn't really matter though I was more focused on making new music while I didn't have to worry about anything, but performing, making friends, and well making new stuff.

Since we were currently stuck on the bus to Chicago, it was the perfect time to do a final tweek of my new opener and closer. The plan was to have had them ready by the time I started the tour, but since Joel was well Joel and keeping secret jokes, I decided to surprise him on his last day. Especially after the whole live feed to Skrillex thing. They were actually really cool tracks. When they're ready to be released, hopefully it'll be on an LP. I had the concept in my head for a while now I just had to make and finish the other 15 songs I'd dubbed to go on it. For now though I had "There is no Beginning" and "There is no End" almost done. It was essentially the same track just one was backwards. There is no Beginning started with a classical orchestration with each element slowly breaking down into dubstep until the whole thing ended as a completely electronically made track. There is no End was the reverse effect, rebuilding itself into the original classical melody's finale.

My current task was making sure everything broke down and rebuilt in the correct pattern at the correct times on the respective tracks. We were estimated to hit Chicago around 10:30 - 11:00 a.m so I had a little more time to check everything on them before it was time to explore and site see. We had opted to forgo a hotel the previous night in order to have some down time to enjoy the city before the show. I was willing to deal with a military style shower on the bus in order to enjoy this. Ohio and Indiana were cool and all, but well there wasn't a whole lot to explore there. No offense to anyone from either state, I just don't know a whole lot about the mid-west nor really care to. You can thank the girl in my psych class my freshman year who was from Ohio and believed everyone in California was the devil and out to get her for my opinions, but I digress.

I was held up in the makeshift studio in the rear of the bus, which once I had the bus to just me and the guys I was planning on turning into my own personal bedroom - bunks were cool and all but I liked to nest and was more creative sitting against the corner of a wall on a bed surrounded by pillows and things I liked rather than at a table in a room. Hardly acoustically functional but highly conducive to creativity. Needless to say I was in my designated corner with my laptop and headphones on while I critiqued my work so far. That was until a giant pillow crashed into my head. Hard.

"Ow!" I scowled looking up from my Macbook.

"Well you didn't respond." Jordan laughed leaning against the entry way.

"Well you have my undivided attention now."

"We're like 15 minutes out so get ready or whatever cause I'm hungry and want off this bus." he said before disappearing.

"I want pizza!" I yelled after him. So much for a little more time. Not that I really needed it; the songs were done. It was my performance anxiety getting the best of me. It'd be much healthier of me to make a new mix to play over the course of the tour instead. Everyone else mixed in other producers stuff while I did only my stuff. Then again I was still a baby producer. I'd have to talk to Joel about that before he left. In the mean time I had a city to see. I closed my lap top and set in my case before attacking my suitcase.

I opted for my Hustler Fuck Love v-neck, dark wash jean shorts and knee high suede boots with buckles. I had decided it was more efficient in the laundry department to stay in my PJs for travel and dress when necessary. I was doing fairly well so far. I didn't care what Myles or Jordan saw me in and Joel was becoming like another big brother to me so I was caring less and less about his teasing me.

"So what's the plan?" I asked sliding onto the couch area.

"Food." Jordan said nodding in agreement with himself. I rolled my eyes.

"I don't know, but we should go adventure." Myles offered.

"Just don't adventure yourselves into the ghetto." Joel laughed.

"You don't wanna come?" I asked.

"Nah I wanna play some DS."

"I swear you are the only person I know who'd rather play video games."

"Whose been touring for years?"

"You." I sighed. "Well my only request is we get pizza."

"Aly, what the hell else would you eat in Chicago?" Myles scoffed.

"Alright we're all on the same page. I get it." I was getting anxious to get off the bus. There were only so many things you could do while on a bus and despite the fact that I'm content doing nothing at home, I hated doing nothing on a bus. I suppose I just liked the option of being able to leave and go to the gym or shop or just walk.

Not even five minutes later the bus parked. Jordan and I tripped over each other to get out. It was kind of funny that he shared the same sentiment when he was more content doing nothing than I was. We were both just special I guess. I was already heading towards the other guys' bus when Myles made his way off.

"What are you doing?" Jordan asked as I kept walking.

"Seeing if any of the guys wanna go." I yelled over my shoulder. They had arrived ahead of us and no one was clamoring to get out yet. I was beginning to think is was one of those things that you got used to over time. Or I was the only a.d.d. producer on this tour. Nope. Porter hopped off the bus followed by John and Josh.

"Hey." Porter greeted me.

"Hey, uh Jordan, Myles and I are gonna eat slash adventure if you guys wanna come."

"Yea so long as we get - "

"Pizza. There will be no concessions on this point." I said.

"Okay then." Porter laughed.

"John? Josh?"

"Uh yeah why not." Josh laughed. John looked disappointed.

"I would, but Dillon is meeting us early so I told him we'd wait." he said looking at Porter like he beat him to agreeing to go.

"Oh fuck I forgot about that...eh he'll get over it." I spun around to make sure Jordan was out of ear shot for that tid bit of information. Still oblivious. If he'd heard I could kiss my pizza goodbye until who knows when. Not that I wasn't less enthused about finally meeting Dillon. I just wanted to be fed and thoroughly entertained first and not bored and hungry. I'd make a better impression once I was fed. Plus I could still see the shock on Jordan's face tonight when we got to the theater.

"Oh well I'll see you later. I can bring you some back though."

"You would be my new best friend if you did....just don't tell Skrillex." he laughed.

"Right. Well I promise if Joel does anymore live feeds I wont tell him." I swore raising my right hand.

"Just no one tell Jordan about Dillon coming I want to see his face when we get to the show."

"Deal." I looked a Porter and Josh.

"Oh yea deal." Josh said. Porter rolled his eyes

"What is with all the surprise stuff? Joel with you and S- OW" John smacked Porter on the back of the head. "What?"

"Her and who?" John said giving him a you are a dumbass look.

"Damn see this is retarded."

"Jordan is uber gay for Dillon. If he knows it'll ruin the whole him looking like as asshole in front of him thing, and I wont get food."

"Aright fine." Porter conceded.

"Good now let's go I'm hungry." I laughed.

"Lead the way." Porter laughed.

"Hey wait where's Zedd?" I asked.

"Oh he's passed out still. He can catch up with us later if he wants, but he should sleep." Porter shrugged.

"Oh fer sure." I said as we made our way over to Jordan and Myles who now had their cameras. I should have thought of that; then again three of us with cameras ranging from $300-700 was asking to get robbed.

"Where is there pizza Aly?" Jordan asked as we made to set out. We didn't have a car so our options were bus, taxi or walk and after one two may horror movies involving taxi cabs and my person dislike of public transit where ever we went needed to be in walking distance.

"Um there's a good one on Broadway that's supposed to be good. Or there's down that way on the same street."

"Alright. Adventure time." Myles smiled.

"Wait which way?" I asked as Myles and the guys started walking. Myles shrugged and kept walking.

"We're adventuring who cares." He called back. I should be used to this by now since half the time I'm the one walking off with them with out giving an answer.

ALT POV

"Hey Joel, where you at?" a familiar voice said from the front of the bus.

"Back here." I called powering down my DS and hopping off my bunk. "Oh shit! You're early!" I said realizing it was Dillon.

"Yea, I guess Sonny thought we had the same amount of shows in Europe, but I wasn't on the bill for the last three, so here I am." he shrugged.

"How is Skrillex? I've been messing with him."

"Oh really? Uh he's fine. I know when I left he was a bit disappointed."

"He'll be fine. But now that your here you get to be in on all the action."

"What are you scheming now?" he laughed.

"I sighed a new producer thanks to Sonny sending me a clip."

"So I've heard."

"Yea and she doesn't know Skrillex is coming when I leave and he doesn't know she's staying on when he gets here."

"So what's the interesting spin on this whole situation?"

"She's interesting."

"It's a she? That's the catch?"

"No. She just reminds me of him, well if he had a more demented prankster side like me. And I also think he's going be in trouble when he meets her."

"You're playing match maker?"

"No god that's the last thing I need. I can see it now all my live streams will be about Meowingtons, Skrillex, and how their relationship is going. Eww. It's just fun to mess with him because I know he like loves her stuff and wants to meet her."

"And you've got everyone else in on this?"

"Yep. Her and her friends are the only ones who don't know. I'd have told them, but she'd probably be more willing to torture it out of them than out of us." I laughed.

"I'm suddenly more glad I came early." he chuckled "Speaking of, where is everyone at?"

"They went to get lunch a while ago so if they aren't on the bus my guess is they went together."

"Gotcha. Well I'm going to go settle in over there before all the fun starts happening then."

"Definitely man, see you in a little while."

NORMAL POV

Jordan threw what was left of his pizza slice at me, hitting me square in the chest. So much for re-wearing this shirt before laundry day.

"Oh shit." he laughed covering his mouth. If he thought I wasn't going to retaliate, he was wrong. I grabbed the pizza from my lap - thank god for the napkin I put over my shorts, and chucked it at him. "Ewww," he whined wiping sauce off his arm where I'd hit him. All the while Myles was taking pictures and Porter was close to tears with laughter. Jordan and I looked at each other, Porter was oblivious. I wasn't one to normally waste food, but well Porter need some pizza in his life. Simultaneously, Jordan and I pelted him with slices.

"Hey!" he choked in shock. I ducked as a second sliced flew over my head. I didn't have access a shower that would allow me to get sauce out of my hair before the show, so head shots were not on my agenda. My this point Josh was hiding behind a plate and making his way to the door.

"Oh no you don't!" I laughed grabbing a slice and chucking it at his back. Jordan and Porter followed suit, leaving Josh covered in more pizza than the rest of us aside from Myles, but I had a plan to fix that too.

"Uh we should go." Jordan said realizing the other diners were staring at us.

"Good call sir!" I said grabbing one last slice of pizza to eat on the way back. We all scramble out of our booth and made for the door before anyone could reprimand us, or rather me, since I was the only girl and we're apparently more responsible. Myles snapped a couple photos of me eating my last slice while I was cover in sauce and other ingredients. The shutter shots were quite funny. It showed me eating pizza covered in ingredients , plotting how I was going to get him dirty, and then the ultimate attack. I launched myself onto him hugging him so the sauce and other crap got all over his shirt too. It was very zombie like - except I didn't intend on eating him.

"I kind of hate you right now." He sighed peeling me off of him.

"I just wanted to include you." I pouted. He just shook his head.

"At least you don't look like this." Porter said holding out his arms to display the full carnage that was his shirt and jeans.

"No fuck you guys." Josh said turning around. He definitely got the worst of it when the pizza exploded upon impact. "You know we have like 5 blocks to walk looking like this," he signed.

"I've seen worse." I shrugged.

"Do I want to ask?" Porter snickered.

"Probably not." The worse I had been referring too was one night when Jade had gotten too drunk and had thrown up everywhere. It wasn't pretty.

"You look like a zombie." Myles laughed looking at the red saucy chunks sliding down my arm. and chest. I smiled before tilting my head in a demented smile at Jordan, who was on his phone, and inching closer to him.

"What the Fuck!" Jordan said looking up.

"Run its a zombie!" Myles screamed and took off followed by the rest of the guys. He'd apparently forgot I was a sprinter in high school. Or maybe I never told them. Either way I shot off after them. I caught up to Jordan first and grabbed from behind launching myself onto his back.

"Aahh!" he yelled steadying himself from the sudden additional weight.

"She's got Jordan!" Porter said still running with Josh and Myles who was fading fast. That was the side effects of smoking both weed and cigarettes, you can run fast for very far.

"If you don't care about smoking killing you, worry about the zombie getting you." I laughed as he slowed to a walk.

"Zombie aren't freakishly fast."

"Says who? Have you seen Walking Dead or 28 Days Later. They're fast as fuck."

"Whatever, I'll just make sure I'm with you at the end of the world, with you and your brother gun collection," he shrugged. I smiled and rubbed his head messing up is Dillon Francis hair do. "Hey! I will drop you." He and Braden were the only two guys I knew who worried about their hair getting messed with.

"Well I'd say this was quite an adventure." I laughed as we made our way back to the buses where all of us were going to be in need of showers.

It was only 3:36p.m. when we got back, which meant we'd still have a few hours before the show to kill.

"What the hell happened to you?" Joel laughed as Jordan, Myles and I climbed onto the bus.

"Jordan started it!" I said.

"Well you turned into a zombie."

"That was after! You should see Porter and Josh though." I laughed. Joel just shook his head and laughed.

"I have her zombie attack on film," Myles offered.

"Ugh, there's pizza goo on my back now too. Thanks Aly." Jordan said. We'd both apparently forgotten that we were covered in food.

"Yea let me see." Joel half smiled. Myles offered him the camera and showed him the play by play.

"Haha." Joel shook his head.

"Well I'm going to go shower," I sighed heading for the bathroom.

"Uh no. I'm way worse than you." Jordan called after me.

"Alright fine go first, but I have to be able to get clean for tonight."

"Yea I know." Jordan said sliding past me into the back of the bus.

"You guys are crazy." Joel mused. I nodded in agreement.

"I did tell you I find weird people to be more fun, and I'm princess of odd." He just smiled and shook his head.

Showering ended up being a longer mission that I had anticipated. Just because its military style showering to preserve water didn't mean it mean it took everyone 5 minutes. I had let Myles go before me too since I was the one who would require the most water. They were pretty much in and out, it was me and my long ass hair that took a majority of the time which was still only 10 minutes if that. Adventure time was over for me since we had to be at the theater by 6:00 p.m. and it was already 4:23p.m. Jordan and Myles ended up venturing out for some dinner and brought me back Taco Bell, which I ate while my hair air dried a little before torturing it with the blow dryer, straighter and teasing combs. On days where I had more time I let my hair fully air dry and used multiple heat protection serums to keep my hair from frying from all the exposure. Once all necessary grooming was done it was time to get dressed for the show.

"What's the song of the day boys!" I called as I sorted through my array of costume options.

"Oh I got a good one." Myles answered. This was our new game, they picked a song and I had the duration of it to choose an outfit and go with it. Surprisingly it cut down on my getting ready times, since whatever wasn't on my body by the time it was done meant I didn't get to put it on. This of course didn't pertain to my mask or my hoods since those were key pieces. Today the songs was Still Getting It the Zomboy remix.

"Nice Myles, Nice." I yelled pulling out a red and black corset, black fairy style tutu and black furries. Next went my fur gloves and red and black hood hood with light up ears. It was one of my more modest outfits, so less accessories were needed to complete it.

"So what's the verdict?" I asked giving a twirl.

"Looks good." Jordan nodded.

"Let's do this." I sighed hopping off the bus and heading through the side entrance on the theater. When or well if I ever got more popular in the scene then I'd have to reconsider getting dress on the bus and then venturing inside, but I'd cross that bridge when I got to it.

Performing was getting routine now too. I was second so I waited anxiously through Joshes set, Jordan would calm me down right before and then after it was over I went back to playing around with the guys or watching the show. Performing itself was always new since I had never been to any shows outside of LA and thus people we're more curios about me than actual fans. I'd like to think that I was gaining a fan base. According to my social media sites that was indeed the case. I knew all the guys watched me from time to time while they were running around and prepping for their sets. They didn't venture onto stage with me though like they did each other. I was still the new girl on the scene so it didn't bother me, it was one of those things where they weren't sure how I'd react or if I'd be okay with the intrusion. They were there cheering for me when I was done though.

"Hey Aly!" Porter called as I hopped off the stage. "I've got someone who you should meet."
Of course it was Dillon Francis. I gave a sideways glance at Jordan who was struck stupid with shock. I probably would be in a similar state if I hadn't already known. "Dillon this is Aly, Aly Dillon." Porter said as I got closer. Dillon gave me a skeptical look that was quite humorous. I raised an eyebrow and returned the look.

"You don't look like a producer?"

"Well I am a cat."

"She's dressed modestly today." Porter laughed watching our exchange. Dillon considered this for a moment still looking me over.

"I've never met a cat who could Produce."

"But you've met a dead mouse who can."

"Touche."

I nodded in response.

"I like you." he laughed, "I'll have to start watching your sets."

"I'd say the same, but I've seen you before." I laughed, "You're one of my influences."

"Wow, I never thought I'd see the day I heard that." I glanced over my should at Jordan who still wasn't quite sure of what to do.

"You should probably come with me." I smiled mischievously.

"Why?"

"Because it will be fun."

"I don't exactly know how to argue with that."

"It's best you don't" Porter smiled.

"Awesome." I said leading him over to Jordan and Myles.

"Dillon these are my friends Myles and Jordan. Guys this is Dillon."

"Oh hey man what's up? I'm Myles." Jordan was still scrambling to maintain his composure. Dillon gave me a questioning look.

" Uh Jordan let's see how should I put this.... he's got a bit of a guy crush on you." That snapped him out of it.

"No I don't! I mean I'm a big fan" he stumbled.

"It's cool. Nice to meet you guys." he smiled shaking their hands.

"Jordan is experimenting with moombahton." I offered saving Jordan from trying to kill me later.

"Oh awesome. I'd like to hear what you're working on sometime if your up for it."

"Uh yea man, that'd be like a huge deal for me."

"I'm always down to see what's being produce in that area." he said as Zedd left the stage area and Porter made is way out to set up his stuff. "Oh shit, I should go make sure all my stuff is ready, but I'll see you guys around."

"Can't really avoid it." I teased.

"Good point." he smiled stealing my hood.

"Hey!"

"I'm borrowing this!" he shouted as he ran off. I rolled my eyes. It wasn't like I couldn't get it back eventually.

"You're a bitch." Jordan said as Dillon disappeared.

"I know."

"But I kinda love you right now in a masochistic way"

My decision not to steal it back ultimately paid off. Watching him DJ in a furry red and black hood with light up ears was awesome. Plus he gave me a shout out as his new stylish friend. It was a little bit epic. The next 11 weeks were going to be quite interesting now that he was here. It also meant that I would be doing a lot more dancing and partying after my set. It was equally funny to watch him look for me when his set was done. Having met me in costume he wasn't expecting me to change before the set was over. Thanks to the pizza debacle early I had to wear new clothes. In this case it was a pair of almost black jean shorts with a black belt, a white Haters Make Me Famous tee and red converse topped off with a pair of black sunglasses. Once Dillon realized who I was he completed my outfit by replacing my hood on my head.

"So what's the plan for tonight?" Porter asked.

"Aren't we heading out right after this?" Dillon asked. We all just stared at him.

" You'll catch on quick," Porter laughed "these guys promised to show us how they do it back home." In deed we had.

"On the bus?"

"Si." I answered, "You down?"

"I wanna be, but I'm pretty jet lagged I don't think drinking while in motion will go over well tonight."

"Understandable," I nodded.

"So Aly, the question now stands," Porter asked slinging his arm over my shoulder "are you ready to show us how you party?"

"Oh yeah." I smiled knowing that the mini fridges on the bus were currently filled with Three 30 packs and two handles. More than enough alcohol for the eight of us "Let's do this!" Jordan and Myles nodded in agreement.

"What are we doing?" Zedd asked rejoining our group, Josh and John were still watching Joel.

"Fucking shit up." Jordan answered.

"Sounds fun." he laughed as the five of us made our way back to the bus to wait for Joel.

ALT POV

Joel sent me another video. This time it was them partying. It had to be at least 6:00a.m. where they were if not later into the morning. Then again, it wasn't a live feed just a recording. It was of course of Aly. She was still wearing her fluffy hood from her earlier and a pair of sunglasses. It was weird, I hadn't seen her face yet, then again I was only seeing videos of her shows and now when she was drinking and playing beer pong with her friend against Porter.

"Throw the ball Aly." Porters teammate said.

"I will." she scowled and then hugged her friend - Myles I think his name was.

"Oh yup Aly's wasted." he teased more.

"Fuck you Jordan." She said releasing her friend and chucking the ball across the table without much aim. It bounced into the remaining cup, but she wasn't paying attention.

"That's game! No coming back from that." Myles laughed.

"Huh?" she asked. Jordan shook his head at her. Porter looked shocked. "Ha hey Smyles. That's 7 in a row." She smiled doing a little happy dance to the song in the back round before hoping on the counter. I wanted to be there so bad. I loved Europe, but it was all flybys and I wanted to see my friends. I wanted to see her.

"What does hugging Myles have to do with her drunkness?" Zedd asked.

"When she's drunk she hugs him, then when she hugs him again repeatedly she's wasted, probably blacked out.

"I fine." she protested leaning back on the counter, barely catching herself from falling in the sink.

"Sure." Joel laughed from somewhere.

"Burst, burst, burst...swag" She and her two friends all said in unison to the new song. She hopped off the counter deciding it was safer on her feet.

"How much have you had to drink Aly?" Joel asked turning the camera to face her. she grinned into the camera and guided it to the two empty handles of rum and tequila and 2 empty 30 packs.

"A lot." she said off camera. Joel focused on her again.

"Just in case you don't remember in the morning you can consult your camera." he laughed. She had no idea he was filming this time. The memory of her telling me goodbye made me smile. Whether she really knew it was me watching or not didn't matter. She'd still said my name.

"No, she has to guess like everyone else." Jordan- I think said. "Yep she about dead. See." I guess they were right about the hugging him thing.

"Don't let her sit!" Myles said. Joel blocked her from the couch.

"You can't sit Aly. It'll be over." Jordan warned from his spot on the couch opposite Joel.

"Is she blacked out yet? Porter asked. All of them seemed like they may not remember this so judging was probably pointless.

"Hard to tell with her. She's good at seeming fine, minus her balance, and then she'll just pass out." Myles said leaning on the counter.

"Hmm. Hey Aly!" Porter yelled throwing one of the ping pong ball at her. Jordan cringed. For being as drunk as she was, she caught it right before it hit her in the face and with no effort.

"I'm wasted, not retarded." She said scrunching her nose at Porter before throwing it back at him. Aly hugged Myles a third time.

"Well at least she's an affectionate drunk." Zedd laughed.

"Uh only to Myles if you noticed, I got flipped off and Porter got smacked with a ball. She is quite amusing hammered though" Jordan laughed. Aly was staring intensely at the floor apparently contemplating something.

"Don't do it." Jordan warned. She sat down and stared at him in defiance. He shook his head.

"I'm fine."

"Shoes off."

"No." she smiled crossing her arms. It was cute and also impressive that she was still awake.

"What with the shoes?" Porter asked.

"What happens when you pass out with your shoes on at parties?" Jordan asked waving a sharpie.

"Oh." Aly was silent watching them, while they all looked at her. She was fighting a losing battle at this point. She looked at the camera one last time before fading into a little ball in the middle of the floor and kicking off her shoes.

"Aly. Aly!...Hey ALY!" Myles yelled at her. "Yep she's out." he laughed looking at Jordan. He sighed and slid out of the booth.

"Bed time." Jordan sighed scooping her off the floor and disappearing to the sleeping area. That's where the clip ended.

NORMAL POV

I rolled off the top bunk with a thud and headed straight for the bathroom.

"How are you feeling?" Joel mused. I just shook my head. Normally I could hold my alcohol well and survive being hungover without getting sick; however, that endeavor is much harder when you're on a moving bus. Thank god it was a 15 hour drive to wherever the fuck we were going. "I guess I should ask how is your memory?" I had my memory...or at least most of it...shit I don't remember past the first handle and judging by the scene in front of me we killed everything.

"I don't know. I remember beer pong and shots." Joel nodded amused. I'm pretty sure our whole night consisted of those two things and maybe a little dancing....

"Since Myles and Jordan are still out of it. I guess I could show you our home movies." He smiled.

Oh God. Anything, was better than waking up to video footage of a night you can't remember. There were reasons you didn't remember them.