My Little Earthquake

A raging headache woke me up. I laid there for as long as possible before I opened my eyes. I rolled over to look at the clock and was greeted instead to a glass of water and pain killers. I gratefully took them before I laid back down with a grown.

Memories from last night started trickling in. I remembered everything up to seeing Harry telling that guy off, then it’s all hazy. I couldn’t remember how I got home.

I got up and noticed I was only in my underwear. I grabbed a baggy hoodie from the floor and threw it on. I rubbed the sleep from my eyes as I walked into the living room, and froze when I found Harry on the couch, “Oh. Hi.”

“How you feeling?” He asked turning the tellie off.

I sat on the other side of the couch, pulling the hoodie down more so hide some of my legs, “Like shit.”

He nodded, “Not surprised, you yakked everything you drank as soon as you got home.”

“You took me home?”

“You don’t remember?” He looked hurt.

I looked down, “Not really, it’s all hazy. I remember you showing up but after that, not much.”

He sighed, “Well I found you drunk as hell, trying to fight off some guy, dragged you home, cleaned you up after you threw up and tried to put you to bed, but you wouldn’t sleep until I got in next to you.” He rushed out. I glanced up and he was glaring down at the coffee table.

“Oh,” I bit my lip, “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

I shrugged even though he wasn’t looking at me, “For ruining your night?”

He looked up shocked, “You didn’t ruin my night, I didn’t mind taking care of you.”

“Well you seem upset,” I said timidly.

He rubbed his hands over his face and groaned, “I’m just, god! I’m so tired of you pulling me in and then shoving me out. I love you, so much, and it’s like you don’t even care!”

The truth behind his words felt like a slap in the face, “I do care. I’m not trying to hurt you.”

“I know you’re not,” he snapped, “But that doesn’t change the fact that you are. Do you know how hard it is to be in a room with you without touching you? In the same bed as you and not be able to hold you?”

“Yes.” I whispered.

“Then why are you doing this?! If you feel the way I do, why aren’t we together.” I didn’t know what to say, “Answer me!” He snapped when I said nothing.

“I don’t know anymore okay? I just… I wish I could be a better me, for you.” I couldn’t look at him, my head was throbbing from my hangover and the decimal level of his voice. The honesty in his face and words hit me hard and I was also trying really hard not to cry.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean Emma? Why can’t we just be together? I’m sick of this!”

I sniffed, the threat of tears becoming almost unbearable to hold back, “I just need time okay?”

He barked out a laugh, “Yeah. ‘Time.’ Whatever.” He got up and walked out the door, but not before slamming it behind him.

All I wanted to do is crawl back into bed and forget this conversation, if you can call it that, happened. That wasn’t happening though, I had to shower and head off to work. Why I thought drinking so much was a good idea, i have no idea but I was seriously regretting it now.

*****

“You look terrible.” Pete said once the shopping rush had slowed down.

I glared are him, “Gee, thanks. That’s what every girl loves to here.”

“Hey I call ‘em like I see ‘em.” He smiled. I groaned and rested my head on my arms against the counter, “What’s up?” he pressed.

“You really wanna know?”

“I asked didn’t I?”

I sighed and straightened back up, “Well you asked for it,” and then I launched into it. I told him about partying last night. The creep from the bar, and Harry coming to the rescue then taking care of me. I told him everything right up to where Harry slammed my door.

When I was done Pete let out a long whistle, “Yikes. You had quite an eventful 12 hours.” I rolled my eyes, “Want some advice?”

I shrugged, “If I say no will that stop you?”

“Stop making excuses not to be with the kid.”

I leaned over the counter and rested my chin in my hand, “That’s weird advice coming from my ex boyfriend.”

He rolled his eyes, “Aren’t we on the friend level yet?”

I shrugged, “Some days, maybe.”

“Well whatever, I still think you’re being an idiot.”

I snorted, “Thanks.”

He leaned on the counter next to me, “Can’t you see you’re being stupid?”

“Maybe.” I groaned, “I don’t want to think about this right now, I’ve got too much going on.” I rubbed at my face.

“Like what?” He laughed.

I gave him a stern look, “Like classes. I start tomorrow.”

He rolled his eyes, “You can only use that excuse for so long, you know that right?”

“Why am I taking relationship advice from you?” I snapped.

“Because you know I’m right.”

“Whatever,” I mumbled as a customer came up to the counter, and the conversation was dropped.

*****

When I got home I found Eleanor and Mayra in the living room, “Harry hates me.” I announced and threw myself on the couch next to the girls.

“We know.” They said in unison.

“Oh, awesome.”

“Harry came home when I was still there with Lou, and he just went into this rant to Louis and me about what happened. I’ve never seen him so distraught.” El said. I just groaned.

“Well,” Mayra started, “How’d you expect home to feel?”

“Honestly?” I looked over at them. They were giving me their full attention, “I haven’t… really been thinking about his feelings,” I admitted, “Oh god I’m a bloody twat!”

“No you’re not,” El said, “You’re just going through your own shit. We’ve all been there.”

Mayra nodded, “Yeah, I mean, I don’t personally agree with you,” I shot her a warning look, “But, I get it.”

“You do?” I asked.

“No,” She admitted and smiled, “But as your best friends we’re supposed to support you, so we are.”

Eleanor draped her arm over my shoulders, and did the same to Mayra, “We make such a good team. Now let’s get food, I’m starving.”

I laughed, “So am I.”

“We should get cake,” Mayra offered, “to celebrate you officially becoming a Uni student tomorrow!”

So I decided to put all thoughts of Harry in the back of my mind for the time being and just focus on having dinner with two of my favorite people, and try getting excited about classes tomorrow.

*****

“So how were you’re first 3 classes?” Olive asked as had lunch at a café on campus.

“English was awesome. I can’t wait to start the creative writing part!” I said taking a bite of my muffin, “But math and Intro to Business were boring, but I expected that.” I shrugged.

“Well luckily we have Human Sexuality next, how can that not be fun?” She laughed. We had found out when we met that we were taking the same Human Sexuality class and I was really looking forward to it.

I nodded, “Yeah, should be an easy enough class.”

“Yeah, testing our knowledge on sex! Or scaring us away from it when we learn about STI’s.” She grimaced.

“Yeah, that part I wouldn’t mind skipping.” I laughed.

“So do you have any classes tomorrow?”

I shook my head, “No, I’m only taking classes 2 days a week so Mondays and Tuesdays are swamped. But I figured I could use the off days to work and do homework.” I laughed.

We killed some more time just talking and snacking on out muffins before we headed to the lecture class. There were only about 30 or so people in the class which was small compared to how full my other classes were.

Our professor went over the curriculum of the semester, it seemed like a fairly low key class thank god, then we were supposed to get to know each other, “I want you to get into groups of 3 or 4 and exchange numbers, because these are the groups we’re going to have for group projects all semester.” He said and excused us to find a group.

“So obviously we’re in one together,” Oli announced, “Excuse me guys,” She said to the two guys in front of us, “Do you want to be in a group with us?”

They turned around and man they were cute. One had short dark hair and a nose piercing, and the other had longer light brown hair, adorable smile and a sleeve tattoo. I was instantly attracted to him, so sue me.

“Are you American?” The one with the nose piercing asked Oli.

“Yes!” She said excitedly, “I’m Olive, but you can call me Oli. And this is Emma.” She introduced me.
“Hey,” I waved awkwardly.

“Hi, I’m Jake,” He shook Oli’s hand and then mine.

Tattoo boy stuck out his hand next, “I’m Dustin.” When his hand came to mine, he lingered and smirked at me.

“Hi.” I cleared my throat. Oli sent me an encouraging look.

“Well, let’s exchange information yeah?” Jake said. We all exchanged out numbers and email and spent the rest of the class getting to know each other. They guys were really nice. Oli was real giggly, which I noticed she get’s when she’s around cute guys, it was cute. Dustin kept catching my eye and I tried my hardest to pretend I didn’t even notice.

“Oh my god,” Oli exclaimed as we left the class later, “Those boys were so cute!”

I smiled softly, “Yeah I guess.”

“You guess?” She exclaimed, “You and Dustin kept making googly eyes at each other! And don’t think I didn’t notice how he was turned more towards you then Jake and I.”

“Did not!”

“So did, I saw! But lucky me, I think Jake is more my type.” She joked.

I just shrugged, “Whatever. He’s fit, I admit it.”

“That’s one way to put it.” She laughed.