You've Never Looked Better, And I've Never Looked Worse

"Rian, I can't lead Jack on." I shook my head. He shrugged.

"Maybe it's what you need though."

"Feeling guilty for leading another person on is also not what I need." I narrow my eyes at him. Rian shrugged. I knew I was pestering him with my own problems.

"Sorry Ri, it's just i'm in this hole and no one is there to help me out." He pushed my hair out of my face once more.

"It's okay. I'm here whenever you need me, okay? Maybe you don't know if you like Jack because 1. You've been wrapped around Alex, and 2. You've never really looked at him that way. Who knows, maybe you will like him."

I looked up at him with a frown. "I feel like the hole is just going to get deeper."

"Em, you'll never know unless you try. You look tired. Go lay down and text me when you wake up. I'll come get you and bring you to our tent. I sighed and nodded in agreement.

"Thank you so much Ri. I'd probably be in a bawl on the ground right now if you hadn't of came in." He flashed me his white pearly teeth.

I watched him walk out of the bus and I waited a few seconds before I went to one of the bunks. I really couldn't sleep under these conditions. So much was running through my mind. I shut my eyes, I started nodding off every now and then but I couldn't find myself to stay asleep. Dark blinds covered the windows, but along the edges I could see light peeping in. I found myself staring at the window. I could hear the faint sound of music coming from the tour. I recognized the song as Blink-182. I smiled. Then, I found myself nodding off to sleep.

I sat on the couch, watching as the News played on the TV. I wasn't really paying attention to it, I was just watching the people. There was a knock at the door. I never remembered locking it. I was too lazy to get up from my spot, so I ignored it. The knocks kept getting louder and louder until it was unbearable to listen to. Angrily I got up from my spot and unlocked the door, opening it.

Outside stood a smiling Alex.

"I knew i'd see you again Ember." My eyes widened. My jaw dropped. What? How could he know? He walked up the steps and cupped my chin in his hand. "You have no idea how long i've been waiting to see your face." He leaned forward the connected our lips together. My stomach turned. It was the first time i've felt butterflies in a long time. I ran my hands up his sides and wrapped them around his neck. He removed his hand from my face and went to my thighs. Picking me up in one swift motion, I wrapped my legs around his waist. Our lips never parted as he carried me back to the bunks. He laid me down first and breaking our lips for only a second. His eyes looked into mine. I saw something I had never saw before. His eyes were searching for something in mine.

Answers. He leaned forward to connect our lips again, I started to close my eyes..

"GET UP!" My eyes fluttered open to see the boy I remembered as Brendon sitting on the bed. I stared at him blankly, remembering the dream I had just had. It seemed to real that seeing Brendon, didn't seem real. I started to feel kind of nauseous right then. Light fingertips brushed my shoulder, I jumped. "Sorry! Just making sure you were all there. The boys wanted me to get you. They got lunch." I sighed and nodded.

"Thank you. Sorry, I'm not all there when I first wake up." He smiled his big lips showing his teeth a little.

"Good, I didn't want to startle a pretty girl." I stared at him blankly. Awkward.

"So, about lunch.." I started.

"Right! I'll show you the way!" He said leading me out the door.

I don't think I was ready to have confrontation just yet with Jack.