Shattered Glass & Broken Hearts

“Em, calm down,” Ronnie murmured into her ear as he wrapped his arms around her a few hours later as they stood in the waiting room of the hospital. The doctors hadn’t said so much as a word to her since they’d arrived and asked about Max’s condition. No one was letting her near him, and she had no idea if he was alive or dead. It was killing her, not knowing what was happening with her only brother.

What would she do if he died?

“I can’t, Ronnie,” she whimpered as she shook her head, looking up at him through wide eyes before a small sob fell from her lips as she felt her body begin shaking again.

Ronnie sighed. He knew what it felt like to be in her shoes. He'd experienced the very same thing when Emily had been in surgery after the accident. No one had told him how she was doing back then, either. No one would tell him if she was alive or dead, and when he'd found out she'd been induced into a coma, he'd had no idea what to think. It had been single-handedly the scariest thing he'd ever had to experience, and he knew that telling Emily that things would be okay wouldn't make things better for her.

After all, that was her brother laying in that hospital room. She'd spent ever second of her life knowing him. He'd been there to watch her grow up and he'd been her best friend for so long. Even he couldn't say that about how he'd felt about Emily when she'd been in the hospital. She'd been his soul mate back then - and she still was. But that couldn't possibly compare to losing a sibling.

"Please, just breathe," he murmured as he wrapped his arms around her tighter, his lips pressed against her forehead as he rocked her back and forth. He hated seeing her so distressed. Every bit of pain she was feeling broke his heart, and he wished he could take it all away for her.

"What if he dies, Ronnie?" She sniffled as she looked up at him through watery eyes. "What if--"

"Hey," he smiled, cutting her sentence off as he tucked some of her hair behind her ear. "Max is strong, yeah? He'll pull through this, Em. You know he will and I know he will. He's so strong, just like you. But you've gotta be strong for him, too. Okay?"

She sniffled again and nodded, her body still shaking as Ronnie wrapped his arms around her once again. He pressed his lips to her forehead before he tilted her chin up so that he was looking straight into her eyes before he brushed his lips across hers warmly. Emily groaned against his lips before she returned it for a few moments. It was odd how he could make her feel so good in such a shitty set of circumstances.

"I promise, Em," Ronnie murmured. "He's gonna be fine."

Emily just nodded halfheartedly as he led her over to the couch on the far end of the waiting room. She hadn't sat down since they'd arrived, but she was completely exhausted as he helped her down onto the cushion.

"Why don't you take a nap, sweetheart?" Ronnie murmured. "I'll wake you up if the doctors come and say anything."

Emily was hesitant to go to sleep, worried that Max would already be gone when she woke up. But she also knew that her body couldn't continue staying awake. She was exhausted and it was taking everything in her not to fall asleep where she sat. After several minutes of internally debating with herself, she nodded and rested her head on the top of his shoulder.

"Thank you for being here," she mumbled as she slowly began falling asleep.

It really did mean a lot to her that he was there for her. She didn't know how she'd get through this if he wasn't there. It made her wonder how she would have reacted had this situation taken place just a few months before, when he was nowhere to be found and her heart had still been broken. Hanna and Joss would have no doubt been there for her. But could they have pulled her through the depression that she, even now, was beginning to feel.

She knew that Ronnie would keep her safe, and that was ultimately what made her feel comforted laying here with him in the hospital waiting room. He would get her through this trauma - she knew he would, because that was just the kind of man that he was. Ronnie would never let anything happen to her ever again. She was his and he would give anything in the world to make sure she remained safe.

But could he keep her heart safe? Could he stop Max from dying? That was a question she just didn't have the answer to.

Slowly, she began drifting to sleep, leaving Ronnie to ponder his own thoughts on the situation. Max had always been like a brother to him. Even now he was, though the two of them definitely had some major differences. Ronnie had known for years that Max's addictions would possibly kill him and it terrified him to think that that may be happening now. He had no idea how he himself would cope with it were it to happen.

After all, Max was the closest thing Ronnie had to family here in California. His brother was still back in Nevada with his family. That left Ronnie with nobody in California except for his bandmates and Emily. And while his band mates were great, they didn't have the same bond that he and Max had always shared with one another. They shared the same memories, the same pain. Hell, they shared a birthday.

They shared a love of Emily, even if it was different sorts of love. The two of them were so drastically different but at the same time, they were the same person and that was why Ronnie was completely stunned as he sat there, praying to a God he wasn't entirely sure existed to pull his friend through this overdose. He'd give anything to see Max walk out of this hospital alive.

Several hours went by before a doctor walked out into the waiting room. Emily was definitely passed out at this point and if he didn’t feel so bad that she was so tired, Ronnie would have woken her up the second she heard the doctor call for Max’s family. Instead, he walked over to the doctor with Max and Emily’s parents. Neither one of them said a word to him, but he was relieved to see that there was no animosity between the two of them.

"Is he alive?" Max's mother whispered quietly as she clung to her husband. Her face was that of a mother who'd already lost her son, and that wasn't reassuring to Ronnie as he stood tall, waiting for the worst.

The doctor gave a faint smile before he nodded. "He is. But barely," he added as a footnote when he saw the relief wash over her face. "He's going to be critical for a couple of days, but the worst has passed. He's awake and requesting to speak to his brother Ronnie."

Ronnie's eyebrow arched up. Max wanted to speak to him. He looked over at Emily's parents, who both nodded. He couldn't help but wonder why they weren't a little more upset that he was back in their daughter's life. He knew that they couldn't have been happy when he'd walked away the way he'd chosen to.

"That's me," he murmured softly.

The doctor smiled at him and then turned towards the doors he'd walked out of before. "If you'll follow me, please," he murmured to Ronnie, who nodded as he started walking behind the doctor. He hoped that Emily didn't wake up while he was gone. He didn't want her to be upset that he was going to speak to Max before she got a chance to.

"You said he's going to be critical?" Ronnie asked the doctor as they started walking down the hallway. The doctor nodded, a grim look on his face as they continued walking.

"Yes. Any overdose is critical, but we found copious amounts of heroin and cocaine with alcohol mixed into his system. He's lucky he survived. If that girl hadn't called the ambulance when she had, you wouldn't have a brother to be visiting," the doctor frowned as he looked up at Ronnie. "Your brother is a very lucky man."

Ronnie nodded, his hands clenching into fists at his sides. He'd always known that Max was mixed up in shit that could kill someone easily, but even Max had to have known that mixing all of those things together would land him here. Had he been trying to commit suicide? Apparently, he wasn't the only one who thought so when he heard the doctor's next words.

"We're placing him on suicide watch for the next seventy-two hours," he told Ronnie. "When he woke up, he requested more drugs."

"Idiot," Ronnie muttered under his breath before he swiped a hand back through his hair. After a few more seconds of walking, the doctor stopped outside a door that read Room 341 and smiled halfheartedly at Ronnie before he started walking back towards the nurse's station.

"He's right in there."

Ronnie nodded and opened the door slowly, stepping into the hospital room. He wasn't sure what he was expecting as he stepped into the pastel-painted room, but he knew for sure that he wasn't expecting to see Max sitting up in his bed, the news muted on the TV above his head and a solemn look on his face.

Ronnie just shook his head. He didn't know what else he was supposed to do when he saw the different needles attached to Max's arms. He knew that some of them were probably keeping Max alive right now. It shocked Ronnie at just how bleak of a situation this had become.

"I don't even know what to say," he said after ten long minutes of silence had filled the room. Max blinked and then shrugged as he looked up at Ronnie's face. He saw guilt there, but there was something else there, too. Remorse, maybe?

"I don't, either. Ronnie...I swear I didn't try to kill myself," he muttered. "I understand that the doctors are going to put me in observation for a couple of days and I'm fine with that. I just want Em to realize that I wasn't trying to."

"What were you trying, then?" Ronnie snapped, unable to stop himself from doing so. "Because mixing heroin with cocaine and alcohol is not a smart fucking idea."

"It never killed me before," Max shrugged. "I didn't...I didn't think it would do anything this time."

"You're a fucking idiot!" Ronnie yelled. "You have everything someone could need, Max. You have parents who care, and a sister who'd give the world to see you better again. You've got friends and fans and a whole hell of a lot of people give a shit about you."

Max just looked down at the floor. He didn't know what he was supposed to say and he sure as hell had no comeback for Ronnie. He knew that it was true. He'd taken a lot of things for granted, and he'd let jealousy and anger over Emily letting Ronnie back into her life destroy him. He didn't know where he'd lost sight of everything that used to mean so much to him.

"I want to get better," Max finally mumbled. "I mean it this time. I can't keep doing this to her, Ronnie."

The singer arched his eyebrow before he nodded, folding his arms over his chest.

"You're right. You can't."

Another short silence filled the room before Max finally gave Ronnie a small smile.

"I want to fix things, man. We used to be like brothers. I want it to go back to being like that," he mumbled as he looked straight at Ronnie. The singer thought for a few minutes before he smiled, nodding back at his old friend. Max was always going to be an important part of Ronnie's life. He'd need to get clean first, of course, but somehow Ronnie didn't think that was going to be a problem anymore.

He just hoped that things finally worked out because he knew that it was going to be what would be best for Emily.