The Key Chased the Blade

Simon and I went back to his house and I washed the key off in his sink, but not before vomiting in his garbage can. Pulling the key out of the bird was probably the most disgusting thing I have ever done. Despite that, we put the key in a plastic bag and sealed it up tight. Simon asked, "Do you think we should take it to the police?"

I shook my head. I really didn't know why I did that, certainly it would be a good idea, but for some funny reason, gripping that slender metal key in my hand, I didn't want to give it up.

"Why not?" he asked.

"We've just washed all the evidence away, and besides, it was in the corpse of a bird," I said, and I remembered how grody the key was and thought I was being insane for keeping the stupid thing, but I continued on. "It probably had nothing to do with the crime. The bird probably just ate it and would've pooped it out later."

Simon nodded, and I realized I was white-knuckling the plastic bag with the key in it. I loosened my grip.

"Where do you think it came from?" Simon took it from me and looked it over. "It looks like a house key."

"Somebody probably lost it and the bird thought it was food." I took it back from him. I suddenly felt protective of the object. "I want to keep it," I told him. "Even though it's basically useless."

"You can have it. You put your hand in the bird guts to get it, you've definitely earned it."

I punched him half-heartedly. "We should do something else. I'm kind of creeped out."

"Let's go down to Cold Stone Creamery and get some ice cream," Simon suggested.

"Jesus, it's so expensive though."

"I'll buy, Noah. I'm rich, remember?"

I scowled at him, but he just grinned his stupid dorky grin.

"I hate taking money from you."

"I know you do. But it's on me today."

We left to go get ice cream.