Ties That Bind Us

"You can't be serious," I deadpanned, staring at my boyfriend from across the kitchen counter. The dishes I had been washing slipped into the water as I turned around, and the soapy water splashed onto the speckled counter tops.

He said nothing, just took a deep breath and shot me a half-grin, as if that would make everything better. He wasn't defensive or guarded, he just waited for me to react like he knew I would, which was, well, badly. He had been expecting this. He knew exactly what he was getting into when he walked through the door. That simple fact seemed to throw me even more off balance.

"Dammit, Caleb!" I yelled, running a hand through my shoulder length waves. My voice echoed around the tiny kitchen, and I glared at him. His hazel eyes shone back at me, and my frustration was met with a soft, understanding smile.

"Please Baby, don't yell," he said gently, walking over and placing one of his rough, calloused hands on my cheek.

"How do you expect me not to?" I shot back, my voice lower, but probably still audible to the aging couple in the apartment next to us. His thumb stroked my cheek gently as I stared up at him, my lips pursed and my eyes expectant.

"I know you think I'm crazy," he murmured, and I rolled my eyes for emphasis.

"No, I know you're absolutely mental," I corrected under my breath. He wasn't even phased though, and just continued calmly with his explanation and rationalization. The boy had a knack for being reasonable and calm about everything that was the exact opposite. Sometimes it was comforting, but right now, it just pissed me off even more.

"I just don't want the memory of tonight or the time we spent in this apartment tarnished by us arguing."

"'The time we spent here?' So, you've already made up your mind regardless of what I say?" My voice came off colder and higher than I wanted, but Caleb still didn't back down or falter.

"I think this move would be good for us."

"Good for us? Caleb, we've been together for two years, and in that time, we've lived in six different apartments!" My voice wavered and rose again, even though I was making an attempt to calm myself down.

"Well, I hear seven's an awfully lucky number."

His eyes sparkled and I could tell he was trying to suppress a smile. I scoffed in response and folded my arms tightly over my chest. My teeth clenched as I looked out the window above the sink. His fingers grazed over my jawline as he moved his hand from my cheek to under my chin. He slowly guided my eyes so I was looking directly into his. My bottom lip quivered as I cracked.

"It's just since we got to the last place, we started fighting more and more, and just uprooting again and starting all over... It feels like we almost get settled down and then suddenly we're gone before either of us has the chance to tie ourselves down. We just float from one place to another! I mean, my family hasn't spoken to me since before my graduation, I haven't seen any of the people I consider friends since right after high school, and that was four years ago! I feel like I'm never going to belong anywhere," I ranted, my voice cracking halfway through the second sentence.

Caleb's entire face softened even more, and before I knew it his strong arms were wrapped tightly around me and I was crying into his shoulder. He rocked me back and forth in silence for a few moments, and just that small, simple gesture was enough. He waited until my breathing had steadied a bit before he spoke.

"Addie, I swear I'm not trying to isolate you, and it was never my intention to make you feel like this. I'm just trying to save us both. I've been with you long enough to know that being in the same town as your family but not being able to have a relationship with them killed you," he hesitated; I blinked back the last of the tears and looked up at him. "But you would never leave because deep down you were waiting and hoping. I know that after my brother died, I couldn't stay and drive through the very town that he was killed in. All of these places and memories, they were killing us on the inside."

"I know my methods aren't exactly normal, but admit it, you've been happier since our first move; don't deny it. Sure, we don't live in the real world half of the time; we live in our own little world, but I know it's my favorite place to be. And maybe we don't have any physical, permanent ties anywhere right now, but someday we will. Until then, our ties are each other."

He spoke with so much passion, and I felt the first hint of a smile, a real genuine smile, creeping upon my lips for the first time in a long time. He looked at me, his hazy eyes filled with love as he grabbed my hand and placed on his forest green sweater over the left side of his chest, and his own fingertips skimmed over my collarbone in roughly the same area.

"Your heart is tied to mine, and I'd die before leaving you behind. As long as I'm around, you belong somewhere. You belong in my arms," he finished in a deep, meaningful whisper. "I love you, Addison Taylor."

My eyes welled with tears again, but for very different reasons this time. My lips curled into a complete grin as I gazed straight into his sincere, warm, embracing eyes. I sniffled and held him closer, touching my lips to his in a sweet, soft kiss.

"I love you too, Caleb James," I murmured, the words slightly muffled against his skin.

He pulled away and kissed my forehead before pulling me against his chest. As I cuddled into his shoulder, I could feel exactly what he had been talking about. It had been there the entire time.

"If you go, I'll follow close behind. We'll forge our new life together. Always," I vowed quietly.

He kissed the top of my head and brushed the hair away from my eyes before echoing my words.

"Always."