Blossoming Fates

I knew I’d regret drinking all that liquor last night, but I couldn’t say no to it. And no matter how many shots I drank my throat and mouth still felt dry, especially as I woke up. It was extremely dry this morning. But I wasn’t going to drink liquor to get rid of this dryness, just some water for the day. Some water and a couple of Advil may do the trick. My thoughts were all fuzzy and I had had a hard time remembering the previous night’s events. I could see myself walking into the club with not one good intention for my being there. I had just broken up with my boyfriend of a few years and on my way home the bar had caught my eye. I blame all the neon signs and my toucan instinct had been drawn in involuntarily.

I can remember slamming the small clear glass shots onto the bar asking for one after the next. I couldn’t remember if I had been hit on by anyone or if I had hit on anyone. All I remember was thinking why in god’s name I was drinking all this hard liquor when I had hated it so much. I had strayed far from alcohol ever since I was in high school. I had watched how much liquor can tear people apart, and with such little effort too.

I groan softly as I roll on to my right side nearing close to the edge of my queen sized bed. I wasn’t sure why now I had decided to get involved with any alcohol, I was twenty-six, wasn’t I suppose to know between right and wrong? My head was throbbing already and I couldn’t bear to open my eyes yet. I knew the light would hurt my head only more so. I shifted through my thoughts and tried to remember any small details. I can remember hearing myself giggling as a song came on and then I started to move my hips easily side to side. I knew I was drawing unwanted attention my way, but I hadn’t had much control of that when my decision making skills were impaired.

The light was beginning to slip through my shut eyes and it made me groan again. I couldn’t remember how I had even gotten home last night. I pulled my hands up to my face covering my eyes from the sunlight which had quickly begun to shine brightly through my white lace curtains. My best friend, Payton had said that one day I’d regret ever buying the curtains for my bedroom. That day was defiantly today.

Payton was an average height blonde with a big appetite that carried a loud voice. It almost traveled through the air. In high school I could hear her all the way down the hallway. She was shy though around people whom she didn’t know. I found it very ironic that such a small girl could be so loud and yet so shy at the same time. I loved Payton though; she was like a sister to me. Another one, that is.

My family was a bit complicated. They were all over the place and I didn’t like much of them. When they visited my house on certain occasions I tended to go to my room. I had a mother. My father died a few months ago. I had an older brother, and three two sisters, then adding Payton to the mix too. I was grateful for them, for the majority of the time. They could get on my nerves quickly, but I knew I belonged with them, even if I didn’t fit in well with any of them other than my friend Payton.

I raise my arms high above my head and letting a quiet yawn pass through my lips. In mid-stretch however I tumble off the side of my bed. I should’ve thought this reckless idea out more so, especially since I had work this morning to attend to. I shifted on the red carpet trying to peek through squinted eyes at the clock on my end table. The time read seven thirty and I had to be at work in three hours. I needed to clear my headache fast if I wanted to keep my job for much longer. I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes as I decided I should jump in the shower. I knew that showers and coffee were only faux remedies of curing a hangover, but I was desperate at the moment. I stood up from the soft floor and began to walk towards the bathroom which was just off to the right of my bedroom. On the door however was a lime green post it note with something scribbled on it. I figured it was something I had probably left there as a reminder. Still my gut kept softly suggesting otherwise.

I held my head as I shuffled my way to the white painted door. My eyes were finally able to endure the bright light of the California sunny weather in the summer and I was capable of reading a slightly scribbled note. It was defiantly not mine and panic instantly hit me along with the contents of my last night’s alcohol. I forcefully pushed through the door and began to throw up. I rested my head against the cold porcelain of the toilet as the sweat easily dripped down my face. I had no idea how I was going to manage on going into work today. I breathed in and out heavily trying to get rid of this awful feeling in my stomach. I had been stupid and now I had to suffer the consequences.

I stood up finally and flushed the toilet before looking into the mirror. I had looked worse then I felt. My hair stuck to my face and yesterday’s makeup was smudged and ruined during my sleep. I cocked my head to the side however once I saw a purple mark on my neck. My fingers quickly ran over the mark, I was praying it was make up. I rubbed at the sore spot and realized it was a hickey.

“What the fuck!” I harshly whispered to myself

Quickly starting a shower I scrubbed my body down with an apple scented body wash. My skin was being rubbed raw and I knew I couldn’t erase what I had done last night. I leaned against the cold tile wall inside my shower and held my head in my hands as I desperately tried to remember what I had done last night. I gently shook my head before deciding I would just have to ignore this incident and keep living my life. I finished my shower before getting ready for my job today.

I applied cover up and hid the dark circles under my blue green eyes. I normally had fresh lively skin but this morning I defiantly looked like a train wreck. I quickly put on my black eyeliner before blow drying my damp chocolate colored hair. My hair dried in its natural straight self I quickly try to add something to it and decide on a simple solid colored headband. I push my bangs out of my eyes before walking back into my bedroom towards the closet. I had already started feeling better and figured today wouldn’t be completely awful, at least more so than usual. After all, I worked in a museum as a tour guide. It can’t be any worse than how it was before. Besides here in California the people were mostly tourists and soon I’d be having my well needed day off. I knew it’d probably be spent at the hospital unfortunately.

I had turned to double check everything if it was in order with my sweater folded over my crossed arms. My bag hung off of my left shoulder weighing my body to lean a bit due to the heaviness of the black purse. I kept the essentials in there, but sometimes they simply added up. I figured I’d tidy up my purses contents when I got the time. I scanned my eyes over my messy bed and the clothes covered floor. I crinkled my nose in disgust. Then my eyes stopped the scan when they landed on that scribbled note. I breathed in deeply and walked over to the note.

'You were great last night hit me up sometime –Syn Gates'

That was all the note wrote and I felt sick to my stomach. I ripped the note off and crumbled it up not even needing to write the number down that lay upon the degrading and pointless note.