A Roller Coaster Built To Crash
Chapter Eight
A Rollercoaster Built To Crash
lacerated clearity;;
If only Madonna could see me now. Oh god, I didn’t know how I would be able to explain all this to her. Of course, I couldn’t keep this kind of incident from her. I was a master at keeping secrets, but not from her. There were two ways I predicted Madonna would react. One: she’d squeal like a school girl and demand every detail, most likely expecting a story about my sex scandal. Two: she would be furious. I’ve been friends with Madonna for years and I know every agonizing trick she pulls. If she were to take this the wrong way, she would be warning me of all the dangers I was putting myself at risk [like what a good friend should most likely say in the first place] and demand I stop. I’d probably receive the cold shoulder for a few hours as well.
Honestly, I wouldn’t blame Madonna for reacting so angrily. A part of me was asking myself why? Why are you pulling this shit with someone like him?
But to be completely honest, I wasn’t exactly doing anything with Gerard.
The same day Gerard had re-bandaged my wounds, I left. Gerard has insisted I wait till early morning just before dusk so he could escort me out of the town without being spotted. “I know every part of this town,” he had claimed. So, he snuck me out just before the sun rose. We had been rushed so Gerard could make it back home before any rays of the sun could creep up and catch him. He had held my wrist firmly the whole time, running quickly down dirt trails that looked as if they hadn’t been used for years. I smiled and closed my eyes as I ran through the woods with Gerard. The cold morning air stung my cheeks and my hair flapped behind me. My lips couldn’t help but pull back into a wide smile, it felt so perfectly natural to be running through the deep part of the forest where no one could spot us. I felt free as twigs snapped and crunched under our feet and pine needles brushed past our numb cheeks and filling my nostrils with the serene stench of honeysuckle.
Finally, Gerard had stopped abruptly and tightened his hold on my wrist to snap me out of my high. A small smile flickered across his lips and I began to notice just how nervous he was. I, who had never been afraid of the sun and actually enjoyed it’s warm beam, didn’t know the terror that seemed to be bred into him. But I tried to understand and squeezed his fingers comfortingly. Our breaths were heavy from running, his more then mine, and blew visibly up into the crisp forest air to disappear before one another’s faces.
“This is fine. I can find my way out,” I assured him.
“I wish I could take you further but I have to be getting back. This is as far as I can go,” Gerard exclaimed but I just dismissed his apology.
“You better get going. I’d say the sun’ll be coming out in about an hour,” I said and let go of his hand expecting him to release my wrist in return. Gerard just stared at me for a moment, our eyes connecting but nothing being passed towards each other; we were too stressed to exchange anything. He gave up and let go of me.
“Tomorrow night, at midnight, meet me at West Hudson Park,” he said, his voice almost a command. My eyebrow had instinctively arched and I shook my head.
“No, no. Gerard, I appreciate you taking care of me—“
“Meet me there.” My hand had grabbed out to snatch his wrist to talk sense into him but he had already begun to run. I bit my lip and hoped he would make it home in time.
The sun had indeed risen in an hour and basked the forest in it’s rays of light. Beams of sunlight divided themselves through the leafless branches of the trees to streak the air. Slowly, the small frost on the ground and twigs defrosted and the air warmed up to give feeling back in my face. The forest truly was beautiful, even in the ugliest of stages the trees went through during the cold seasons of winter. I felt sad that Gerard couldn’t see this. He could never witness the sun rise and begin the new day or the life it started. Birds began to awake, their sweet chirps filling the air and cause my heart to flutter.
I still wasn’t sure what happens to me. Ray had told me it was the wolf in me when I had confided my natural addiction to the wilderness. It was a reasonable explanation. My nose tingled from all the strong scents around me. I could smell every bird in every tree or bush and every squirrel that climbed up each branch. I could hear every leaf flutter and every crunch of the ground when an animal scurried across the floor. My toes curled in my shoes as I restrained the urge to twirl and start into a run. Every sense in me was bursting and I could barely contain myself. I wanted to feel the dirt between my toes and the rush of the wind against my face with the adrenaline of a full sprint through the woods. My body was craving but I restrained my change by keeping in mind the pain I would experience trying to transform so soon after the last full moon.
Instead of lingering longingly in these woods, I found my way out instead. It was depressing to witness the beauty of the forest slowly diminish into tainted soil. The birds lost their voices as I neared the end of the forest towards the town on the border. The scuttling of the squirrels ceased and left an uncomfortably stilled silence in the air. Sadly, the natural forest floor began to produce more gravel until a full road formed to lead me back into the world where cars polluted the air and roared through highways. I sighed as I took my last step from the forest onto the street pavement, my shoes crunching on the floor designed by human hands.
I left the woods that had once stretched much farther a hundred years ago.
For the rest of the day, my thoughts had left the tainted forest and were now fully focused on the night ahead of me. Now, one thought had been blaring through my head and every time it repeated I grew even more frustrated. What the fuck was he doing? A part of me was already putting my foot down on this meeting he had scheduled so abruptly. There was no way I should even be considering it. It’s forbidden. I had broken so many laws in the last few days and gotten away with it—I didn’t like pushing my luck.
And why would he want to see me again anyways? First time was enough. He was a kind vampire with an actual soul. So what? I said my thank you, and like any other reasonable werewolf, was willing to drop the situation. It was embarrassing enough to be helped by one of his race. But part of me wasn’t embarrassed. Just like how I wasn’t embarrassed to visit Madonna every few weeks.
This was shameful, I concluded and rubbed my temples wearily. If I were to explain this to Ray, I could already see his disgusted frown and hear the scorn in his snaps. A part of me even wondered if Ray would turn me in. I shivered to think of myself executed by the slash of his fangs across my throat like I witnessed on several occasions. I often had nightmares about this; hearing the discouraging roar of the crowd around me egging on my brutal slaying as Ray, in his forever intimidating build, crept his way towards me. Those narrowed yellow eyes burned into me with hatred and the need to inflict the punishment I deserved upon my trembling body that attempted to go down fighting like s many before me. I could practically feel his heated growl against my face as he neared me, preparing to sink his fangs deep into my esophagus and tear my windpipe from my throat to let me choke on my own blood. I had seen it all before, I knew all his cruel tactics. Every one of his victims went down in some crafted strategy of Ray’s. He deliberately prepared their dragged out deaths, leaving them gurgling in their own crimson fluids and gasping for air only to be choked in their last moments.
My hand pressed against my throat and shivered as I pictured my own throat being torn from me.
Ray was a friend, but when it came to the law, he had no pity on criminals.
Then I thought of those luminescent eyes gleaming down at me and that alabaster colored skin that glowed in the milky rays of the moon and that one corner of his lips curling up into a one-sided smile while locks of ebony fell against his cheeks…
“Fuck.” My eyelids snapped closed and my head shook as I sighed. “Jesus fucking Christ. Ray, kill me before this goes further.”
lacerated clearity;;
If only Madonna could see me now. Oh god, I didn’t know how I would be able to explain all this to her. Of course, I couldn’t keep this kind of incident from her. I was a master at keeping secrets, but not from her. There were two ways I predicted Madonna would react. One: she’d squeal like a school girl and demand every detail, most likely expecting a story about my sex scandal. Two: she would be furious. I’ve been friends with Madonna for years and I know every agonizing trick she pulls. If she were to take this the wrong way, she would be warning me of all the dangers I was putting myself at risk [like what a good friend should most likely say in the first place] and demand I stop. I’d probably receive the cold shoulder for a few hours as well.
Honestly, I wouldn’t blame Madonna for reacting so angrily. A part of me was asking myself why? Why are you pulling this shit with someone like him?
But to be completely honest, I wasn’t exactly doing anything with Gerard.
The same day Gerard had re-bandaged my wounds, I left. Gerard has insisted I wait till early morning just before dusk so he could escort me out of the town without being spotted. “I know every part of this town,” he had claimed. So, he snuck me out just before the sun rose. We had been rushed so Gerard could make it back home before any rays of the sun could creep up and catch him. He had held my wrist firmly the whole time, running quickly down dirt trails that looked as if they hadn’t been used for years. I smiled and closed my eyes as I ran through the woods with Gerard. The cold morning air stung my cheeks and my hair flapped behind me. My lips couldn’t help but pull back into a wide smile, it felt so perfectly natural to be running through the deep part of the forest where no one could spot us. I felt free as twigs snapped and crunched under our feet and pine needles brushed past our numb cheeks and filling my nostrils with the serene stench of honeysuckle.
Finally, Gerard had stopped abruptly and tightened his hold on my wrist to snap me out of my high. A small smile flickered across his lips and I began to notice just how nervous he was. I, who had never been afraid of the sun and actually enjoyed it’s warm beam, didn’t know the terror that seemed to be bred into him. But I tried to understand and squeezed his fingers comfortingly. Our breaths were heavy from running, his more then mine, and blew visibly up into the crisp forest air to disappear before one another’s faces.
“This is fine. I can find my way out,” I assured him.
“I wish I could take you further but I have to be getting back. This is as far as I can go,” Gerard exclaimed but I just dismissed his apology.
“You better get going. I’d say the sun’ll be coming out in about an hour,” I said and let go of his hand expecting him to release my wrist in return. Gerard just stared at me for a moment, our eyes connecting but nothing being passed towards each other; we were too stressed to exchange anything. He gave up and let go of me.
“Tomorrow night, at midnight, meet me at West Hudson Park,” he said, his voice almost a command. My eyebrow had instinctively arched and I shook my head.
“No, no. Gerard, I appreciate you taking care of me—“
“Meet me there.” My hand had grabbed out to snatch his wrist to talk sense into him but he had already begun to run. I bit my lip and hoped he would make it home in time.
The sun had indeed risen in an hour and basked the forest in it’s rays of light. Beams of sunlight divided themselves through the leafless branches of the trees to streak the air. Slowly, the small frost on the ground and twigs defrosted and the air warmed up to give feeling back in my face. The forest truly was beautiful, even in the ugliest of stages the trees went through during the cold seasons of winter. I felt sad that Gerard couldn’t see this. He could never witness the sun rise and begin the new day or the life it started. Birds began to awake, their sweet chirps filling the air and cause my heart to flutter.
I still wasn’t sure what happens to me. Ray had told me it was the wolf in me when I had confided my natural addiction to the wilderness. It was a reasonable explanation. My nose tingled from all the strong scents around me. I could smell every bird in every tree or bush and every squirrel that climbed up each branch. I could hear every leaf flutter and every crunch of the ground when an animal scurried across the floor. My toes curled in my shoes as I restrained the urge to twirl and start into a run. Every sense in me was bursting and I could barely contain myself. I wanted to feel the dirt between my toes and the rush of the wind against my face with the adrenaline of a full sprint through the woods. My body was craving but I restrained my change by keeping in mind the pain I would experience trying to transform so soon after the last full moon.
Instead of lingering longingly in these woods, I found my way out instead. It was depressing to witness the beauty of the forest slowly diminish into tainted soil. The birds lost their voices as I neared the end of the forest towards the town on the border. The scuttling of the squirrels ceased and left an uncomfortably stilled silence in the air. Sadly, the natural forest floor began to produce more gravel until a full road formed to lead me back into the world where cars polluted the air and roared through highways. I sighed as I took my last step from the forest onto the street pavement, my shoes crunching on the floor designed by human hands.
I left the woods that had once stretched much farther a hundred years ago.
For the rest of the day, my thoughts had left the tainted forest and were now fully focused on the night ahead of me. Now, one thought had been blaring through my head and every time it repeated I grew even more frustrated. What the fuck was he doing? A part of me was already putting my foot down on this meeting he had scheduled so abruptly. There was no way I should even be considering it. It’s forbidden. I had broken so many laws in the last few days and gotten away with it—I didn’t like pushing my luck.
And why would he want to see me again anyways? First time was enough. He was a kind vampire with an actual soul. So what? I said my thank you, and like any other reasonable werewolf, was willing to drop the situation. It was embarrassing enough to be helped by one of his race. But part of me wasn’t embarrassed. Just like how I wasn’t embarrassed to visit Madonna every few weeks.
This was shameful, I concluded and rubbed my temples wearily. If I were to explain this to Ray, I could already see his disgusted frown and hear the scorn in his snaps. A part of me even wondered if Ray would turn me in. I shivered to think of myself executed by the slash of his fangs across my throat like I witnessed on several occasions. I often had nightmares about this; hearing the discouraging roar of the crowd around me egging on my brutal slaying as Ray, in his forever intimidating build, crept his way towards me. Those narrowed yellow eyes burned into me with hatred and the need to inflict the punishment I deserved upon my trembling body that attempted to go down fighting like s many before me. I could practically feel his heated growl against my face as he neared me, preparing to sink his fangs deep into my esophagus and tear my windpipe from my throat to let me choke on my own blood. I had seen it all before, I knew all his cruel tactics. Every one of his victims went down in some crafted strategy of Ray’s. He deliberately prepared their dragged out deaths, leaving them gurgling in their own crimson fluids and gasping for air only to be choked in their last moments.
My hand pressed against my throat and shivered as I pictured my own throat being torn from me.
Ray was a friend, but when it came to the law, he had no pity on criminals.
Then I thought of those luminescent eyes gleaming down at me and that alabaster colored skin that glowed in the milky rays of the moon and that one corner of his lips curling up into a one-sided smile while locks of ebony fell against his cheeks…
“Fuck.” My eyelids snapped closed and my head shook as I sighed. “Jesus fucking Christ. Ray, kill me before this goes further.”