Ever After

The concert was over, along with the mad rush for merchandise. Kali was packing the remnants into their proper boxes and taping them back up. She’d managed to force a smile and happy demeanour during the rush for Marianas Trench merch, but now that it was over she was still feeling twinges of anger in her body. She’d end up over-thinking things, which only got her angrier, which only made her blood boil. A few times she’d gotten so caught up in her thoughts she hadn’t even realized that she’d been tossing the merchandise into the boxes with vicious punches. Thankfully no one was around to see her doing it and reprimand her for it.

She didn’t even really know why she was so mad still. She was just confused at how Chelsea had acted and she was pissed at how Josh had left the stage to come find her. She’d told him not to worry about her, because frankly he’d been doing enough of it as it was. But he’d actually had the audacity to leave the stage to go find her. She just couldn’t understand that man some days. Just because she was pregnant didn’t mean she was suddenly more breakable than the good china. She could still handle herself. She didn’t even have much of a belly yet. It was more of a tiny bulge, really. Regardless, she was still getting mad about it and she wasn’t sure why. Usually she’d be over something like that by now. But maybe, like Chelsea, she was just wrapped up in stress and frustration. Or maybe it was the pregnancy screwing around with her hormones already.

Kali tossed another shirt into its box and groaned.

“Are you still mad at me?” Josh’s voice asked softly from behind her.

Kali’s body stiffened a little but she didn’t turn around to face him. She knew once she did she’d see those big blue eyes and melt instantly and all would be forgotten. She hated doing that when there were issues that needed to be resolved.

“Are you still completely anal about my safety?” she asked bitterly.

“Yep.”

“Then I’m still mad at you.”

Josh laughed coldly. Kali could just picture the looks he was shooting her back.

“What’s the problem here, Kali? Because, honestly, I’m really fucking confused.” He asked in a tired voice.

“The problem here is you’re bordering on suffocation, Josh,” Kali sighed. She finally turned around to face him but kept her eyes on the ground. She leaned against the merch table. “I like that you look out for me, I do, but leaving a show right in the middle of it because I had something to do…that’s a little extreme.”

“I didn’t know what you were doing,” Josh argued. “All I saw was you walking away from some reporter guy. What was I supposed to think? That all was well and you were just going to get some Vitamin Water and Skittles?”

“It would’ve been easier for the both of us,” Kali said in exasperation.

“Would you rather me let you get hurt?” Josh stepped closer and anger was becoming evident in his voice and face.

“I turned out fine, didn’t I?” Kali snapped back.

“I don’t know, you were pushed to the ground. I wouldn’t classify that as fine.”

“Well you really should. You need to give me some space, Josh. Just because I’m pregnant doesn’t mean I’m suddenly in high danger everywhere I go. Just let me fucking breathe—”

“I do let you breathe!”

“Not lately!”

Josh laughed in disbelief. “This actually bothers you so much you’re willing to fight with me about it?”

“I didn’t want to fight with you about it! But yes, Josh, it fucking bothers me!” Kali screamed back.

“Well I’m sorry I fucking LOVE YOU!” Josh yelled in her face. Kali backed up and stared at him. “I’m sorry that I’m not a shit husband and I actually worry about you, Kali. I’m sorry I want our baby to come out whole and healthy. I didn’t realize those were such fucking sins!”

“Well keep yelling at me then, maybe I’ll give birth prematurely because of your bullshit.” Kali said darkly.

“My bullshit? No, Kali, this is all your bullshit!”

“Don’t you dare try to pin all this on me.”

“Not everything is my fucking fault, either.”

“Your worrying is all in your head, Josh. I told you not to worry about me, you promised—”

“I said I would promise as long as you didn’t give me anything to worry about, and you did.”

“Ha, I guess I should’ve caught that little loophole, huh? You’re acting crazy because you’re so dizzied up worrying about me. You need to stop.”

“I can’t stop, Kali! And do you want to know why?” Josh got even closer to her. “I can’t stop worrying about you because I love you with all my heart and I have for so long now. If anything were to happen to you and I wasn’t there to stop it, I don’t even want to think about how that might feel. I’m sorry it bugs you, and I’ll try to ease up some, but listen to me and listen good: I will never just stop worrying about you. You are always on my mind and I will do everything in my power to keep you safe as long as I call you my wife. Do you understand?”

Kali stared up into those stormy blue eyes that were shooting so much authority back into her own. She definitely felt like she’d lost the argument now that he had her pressed up against a merch table with such a look on his face. So, all she could do was nod stiffly and keep staring at him.

“Don’t ever do this to me again,” he said in a much quieter voice. His eyes softened a little.

“Don’t ever stop a show in the middle of it for me again and I won’t.” Kali said, regaining some of her strength. She had to win at least a little something out of all this.

“As long as you don’t give me an excuse to.” Josh said back. His eyes were still intense, never falling from her own.

Kali couldn’t resist tempting him. “I’ll think about it.”

Josh raised one eyebrow. “Oh, you will, will you?” he asked.

Kali nodded and straightened her back, only pushing herself against his front even more.

“Interesting how all our fights seem to end up this way,” he murmured. And it was true. For the most part, whenever they’d fight, they’d always makeup soon after in very…intimate ways. Josh hadn’t decided whether it was romantic or just convenient, but he didn’t really care, either.

“End up what way?” Kali asked innocently. “I just told you I’d think about it, that’s all.”

“You’d better think about it good.”

“Or what?”

Josh shoved all the boxes to the side of the table with one sweeping motion of his arm and lifted Kali onto it instead. He put his hands down on the table on either side of her thighs and rested his forehead against hers, staring straight into her eyes.

Kali laughed softly and played with a piece of his hair. “You wouldn’t do this in the merch tent,” she said. “You haven’t got the guts.”

“You want to fucking try me?” Josh dared.

“Mm, I have, many times.” Kali slowly licked his bottom lip with the tip of her tongue and smirked. “Yummy.”

Josh smiled devilishly and shook his head at her before kissing her slowly. Kali’s fingers brushed through the back of his hair and held it tight. This only prompted him to kiss her harder. Slowly, one of his hands travelled up her exposed thigh to the hem of her dress. He was just starting to move his hand higher when a gasp forced him to stop.

“Whoa! She’s already pregnant, Ramsay, control yourself!”

Kali and Josh pulled apart and stared like two deer in the headlights in the direction of the voice. It was Mike, Sam, and Matt. Both Mike and Matt had their eyes covered while Sam was giggling behind her hand.

“And to what do we owe this unpleasant interruption?” Josh asked, helping Kali down from the table.

“We heard a bunch of screaming, thought we’d come see if everything was alright,” Matt answered in a much-too-quiet voice. “Clearly things are peachy out here.”

“Oh, no, you see, he made me mad so we were fighting and screaming and what you saw was us making up,” Kali explained matter-of-factly. “See? There’s a reasonable explanation to it.”

“Right, totally reasonable,” Mike said with a grossed-out face.

“Hey, Matt, where’s Chelsea?” Kali asked softly.

“Oh, she’s in the bus,” Matt replied, kicking at the ground with his feet. “She’s still really upset at herself for pushing you. I tried to comfort her but she wasn’t having it.”

“Ouch, rejection,” Mike exclaimed, “Ramsay wouldn’t know what that feels like, apparently.”

Josh rolled his eyes but grinned.

“Well, I’m going to go talk to her and snap her out of it,” Kali said before reaching up to kiss Josh’s cheek. “See you guys later.”

After Kali was gone, Mike, Sam, and Matt all gave Josh the same look. One eyebrow raised and a smirk on their faces.

“What?!” Josh asked when he noticed.

“The merch tent?” Sam asked. “Really?”

“Look, it’s not my fault!” Josh argued in his own defense. “Things were all heated and we were at each other’s throats and then they kind of died down and she gave me this look and it was really hot, so I—”

“Alright, we don’t need a play-by-play,” Mike interrupted. He walked over to Matt and put his hands on the sides of his head. “Virgin ears, man!”

“What?” Matt demanded. “I’m not a virgin!”

“Says the one who got rejected instead of getting hot and heavy in the merch tent.” Mike joked, putting his arm around Sam and walking away.

“Shut your pie-hole, Ayley,” Matt grumbled as he trudged after them.

Josh watched them go with a sort of amused look on his face. He ran a hand through his hair and blew the air from his cheeks. He was still kind of regretting blowing up at Kali like he did. He always regretted it, because each time she got the same look on her face. The look that said “You’re scaring me now” followed by shocked silence. He hated that part the most. But sometimes, even though they loved each other, they got on each other’s nerves and blowing up in each other’s faces becomes something that has to happen. He just hoped through all the screaming and yelling that he’d gotten his point across. He would never stop protecting Kali, no matter what. Because for one tiny second during their fight, he’d imagined something completely terrible happening to Kali. She was hurt, and he wasn’t there to protect her or take the hurt away. For that one tiny second, he’d experienced the worst pain of his life. If he felt that just from a passing thought, he was terrified to feel the real thing. So he vowed that no matter how angry she got with him, he wouldn’t quit trying to protect her from anything and everything.

I can’t ever lose her. I just can’t…