Checkmate

“Johnny, stop it!” she giggled as I grabbed her by the sides and tickled her waist.

“Come here, you,” I spoke into her ear before kissing her forehead and feeling her body relax and mold into mine. I rested my chin on her head and sighed.

“John, we graduate in two weeks. Can you believe it?” she said sadly.

“I know, love. Before you know it, we’ll be married with 3 beautiful kids. Soon after that, we’ll be watching them walk the stage at graduation.” I half-smiled at the thought of our imaginary family. I couldn’t wait to be a dad.

“Hush and enjoy the sunset. Don’t be such a downer, Johnny boy.”

---------------------------------------------------------------

I was thinking about her again. I had to stop before I actually went insane. I rolled over in bed, facing away from the dusty framed photograph of our cheeky grins at some music festival. My cropped hair was in every direction and my green eyes stared right back at me. Her long blond hair was blowing in the wind as she smiled wide and looked up at my face. My arms were wrapped tightly around her body and her hands were on mine. I would do anything to lay like that again. I would do anything to have my youth back.

------------------------------------------------------------

I let my body sink into the couch I had set up in front of my flat screen in my studio apartment. I upgraded to a nicer flat as our band had finally begun to make substantial revenue. Even though I had enough cash on me for a nice house, I did not want to live alone in a home meant for a family. I didn’t want to be reminded of my lonely status.

My phone began to buzz at I looked down at the screen. Anna Beth’s contact picture filled the screen. AB was a younger girl that I met on tour in our earlier years. She was 17, and I was 24. I took to her like a protective older brother, and she looked up at me like I was the sun. I was there for her when her boyfriends broke up with her, and she was the “little” girl who would always make me friendship bracelets and coo about how cute I was. Now, I was 37 and she was 30, and we were still the best of friends.

“John?” she said cautiously into the phone.

“Beth?”

“Oh, John, I’m so glad you’re home! I missed you so much. How are you?” I could hear the excitement in her voice and laughed a little.

“I’m hanging in here. How are you and Anthony?”

There was silence on the other end and a hesitation to answer, and I could practically see her smile drop into a frown.

“Oh, John, we broke up 3 months ago. Right before you left for tour. Don’t you remember me telling you?”

Shit. I don’t remember hearing that at all.

“Yeah, yeah, of course! I was just, uh, trying to see how you were dealing with it all. Shit, I’m sorry, Beth.” I sighed and gave up on trying to recover from my mistake.

“It’s okay. You know, I’m kind of worried about you. Have you been thinking about it a lot lately?”

I rested my forehead in my hand and let out a defeated sigh.

“All the time. She never leaves my mind. I’m a, a failure. Look at me. I live at home alone. I’m 37. I haven’t had a real girlfriend since college. I only went to college for a year and a half! I’m supposed to be married with a couple kids already. Beth, I’m going to be alone for the rest of my life.”

“Johnny, stop that! She’s still out there for you, bud. You need to quit thinking about her and find her. Look her up on Facebook. Do something! All this bullshit about being alone needs to stop. Alright?”

“I’ll try. I just, I just, I don’t know. Anna Beth, I’m scared. It’s been over ten years since I’ve spoken to her or caught a whiff of her name. She probably doesn’t even remember me.”

I heard her sigh on the other end.

“John, if you don’t go out and find her, then I will.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at her dominating personality. AB always got things done.

“I’ll see if I can find her in the phonebook right now. Bye, Beth.”

I heard the sound of her lips smack together as she blew me a kiss. “Love you, John!”

“Love you, too.” I hung up the phone and got up to stretch my tired bones.

I decided to Google her name on my phone.

Melissa Anderson.

1598 results.

A glimmer of hope-- maybe I would find her.

I scrolled through the hits, most of them being for a law firm. Upon the fifth page, I zeroed in on a webpage for a photographer. Melissa was always taking pictures when we were younger. Did she end up following her dreams? I clicked on the link and waited for the page to load.

The banner for the webpage was a set of fiery amber eyes that I knew so well. My heart began to race as I scrolled down the page looking for a contact number. I froze as I saw those 10 digits at the very bottom of the page. My thumb hovered over the call link for a moment as I gathered my thoughts. Fuck. I was doing this. I clicked on the number and put my phone up to my ear, listening to the dial tone and the rings that followed.

“Melissa Anderson photography, how may I help you?” I heard her voice and froze.

“Uh, I uh... “ I drifted off. I had no idea what to say.

“Are you interested in an appointment?”

“Yes!” I blurted out. Shit. “Yes, I would like an appointment,” I spoke in a calmer manner.

“Okay, uh, what’s the occasion?” her cheery voice questioned.

“I don’t know, really, “ I chuckled. “I’m in a band. Maybe just some shots I can use for our web page and campaigning?”

“Oh, a band! Well, how soon would you be wanting to do this?”

I heard her shuffling through papers, probably looking for availability in her schedule.

“As soon as possible. Uh... is tomorrow available?” I timidly asked.

“Tomorrow? I, uh, let me see...” she drifted off. “I can do tomorrow. Could you come by the studio at noon?”

I nodded my head as if she could see me. “I most definitely can. That’s great.”

“Tomorrow at noon it is. Can I have a name for the reservation?”

I went numb for a moment. “O’Callaghan.”

The other end went completely silent. “O’Callaghan? J- Would this happen to be, uh...”

“John O’Callaghan.” I finished her sentence for her.

“Holy shit. Johnny. It’s me, Mel. Holy shit. You’re still around? What happened to the big band dreams?” I could hear the bitterness in her voice, hoping for disappointment.

“I know, Melissa. My band? We’re pretty big. Haven’t you been keeping up with The Maine?”

“No, John. I stopped keeping up with your band when we were through. Well, I guess I’m happy for you and the boys. It still is the same bunch of guys, is it?”

“It’s been the same five, until the day we die. I’ll let you go for now. Keep my name in your schedule for tomorrow. You probably have a family to get home to; it’s getting quite late.”

“Right. Well. Tomorrow, O’Callaghan. See you then.”

“Right.” I heard the phone click as she hung up. Damn. 15 years. What the hell did I get myself into? Anna Beth was going to kill me for doing it this way.