Checkmate

“John, you’ve been spending a lot of time with Melissa,” Beth stated with an unfamiliar emotion.

I focused my eyes on the woman sitting cross-legged on my couch. Her wavy chocolate brown hair was thrown up in a ratty knot on the top of her head, with long tendrils framing her delicate face.

“I’m glad I have her back in my life. We’re fixing each other,” I spoke with a slight smile.

Beth’s eyes held something I had never seen before. It was as if she was upset over my happiness. A wave of reassurance rushed over her features, and she mustered up a faint smile before nodding.

“Don’t fall too deep, John. You’re vulnerable.”

“Beth, I’m not a child.” Her condescending words struck a bitter nerve in my body. I was a 37 year old man who was falling back in love with the woman he had given his heart to so long ago.

She sighed. Seven years my junior, and she was playing the role of my mother.

“You know I would never try to keep you from something good, J. I’m just... I don’t know.”

I accepted her statement and continued to watch the VH1 Classic special on the large plasma screen in front of me. It might have just been my rushing blood, but I felt Beth’s stare burn on my skin.

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“You’re with Melissa again?” my mother asked me.

I nodded, but stopped myself, with a pondering expression on my face. “Sort of. We’re sorting things out, mom.”

My mother smiled at me, her warm eyes and soft smile manifesting her hidden thoughts.

“Have you told Beth?”

“Of course.” Beth was the one who suggested I search out Melissa in the first place.

“How does she feel about you being with Melissa?” My mom’s silver hair framed her face as she tilted her head questioning me.

“She’s been distancing herself from me, but I’m not sure why. She was the one who originally suggested I catch up with Melissa for closure.”

A knowing look appeared in my mom’s eyes.

“Ah, of course. John, you are so blind,” she said, eyes twinkling with mischief.

Her statement went in one ear and out the other as I heard the front door open.

“Son, you’re home.” A grin settled onto my father’s gray bearded face. “What brings you home to mom and pops?”

“Just catching up,” I spoke sincerely.

He smiled once again and nodded. “John, we love you, but you need some company. You need to find yourself a pretty lady and settle down. We’re still waiting on grandkids.”

My mom spoke up. “Well, John’s seeing Melissa again,” she said with a cheery tone as she raised her eyebrows at my father.

My dad’s eyes opened up in shock. “Is that so? Well, I sure missed the girl. How is Anna Beth, though?”

“Beth’s doing alright, dad. She broke up with her boyfriend a while ago. I wonder if she’ll ever settle down with just one.”

My dad mumbled something. “Maybe ‘cause that ‘one’ is you,” he muttered to himself.

“What?” I asked, curiously.

He smiled wide and my mother elbowed him playfully. “Nothing, John.”

“You guys are still strange,” I laughed as I got up from my seat. “Well, I’ve got to go meet Melissa for dinner soon. I’ll see you guys soon.”

“Bye, my precious boy,” my mom cooed as she took me into her slender frame and planted a kiss on my cheek.

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I glanced at my reflection in the mirror. I smoothed out the wrinkles on my grey button-down and tucked it into my old skinny jeans. I sprayed one last bit of Acqua Di Gio and figured that I may as well be done trying to look nice. Melissa had been inviting me to accompany her more and more often. As surprised as I was about her willingness to reconnect, I was not going to complain. Being in her presence made me feel like I was in high school again, frequenting pizza parlors and singing songs around a bonfire at midnight. Melissa was a breath of fresh air in my life, ironically, because I had already had my taste of her earlier. When you give your heart to a person for the first time, they will always hold a piece of it, whether they return it or not. It’s like an attachment, per se.

I picked Melissa up at her front door and walked her out to my car. She looked dainty in a simple white dress that ended right above her kneecap. Her hair was pinned back on one side so that I could see her entire profile. I liked when girls kept their hair out of their face-- it made them seem so much more beautiful. Blush adorned her cheeks when I took her hand in mine and led her around to the passenger side. When I opened the door for her to get in, she looked up at me with a shy smile and twinkling eyes. A smile crept up onto my own face as I soaked in the happiness that being chivalrous brought to me.

When I started the car up, the mix-tape I had made began to send sound waves through the vehicle. I sensed her smile when she realized where the playlist had come from. Oasis by Wonderwall began to play. It was the song we sang on the night of graduation when we were all in tears about parting ways. I made the playlist for Melissa when she took a road trip to California to visit family for a month. I took special note to include Oasis because of that night. We listened to the music in silence, occasionally humming along and sending smiles in each others’ directions.

Moments like these make me feel alive inside. As age begins to take over, I lose that sense of youthful liveliness. I wouldn’t call it ‘living in the past,’ but more of a re-establishment of my vitality. My music brought the past into the present, and the future into importance. One of the first songs I wrote was about becoming a person. It impacted me in such a way that I tattooed the lyrics onto myself.

‘We all have been degraded, We all will be the greatest’

We’ll all be.