Take This to Your Grave

This wasn't just a soft, little innocent kiss. It was magic, much more than I could comprehend at that moment. Things were natural; Pete kissed me softly, but with passion and intensity that sent stars flying through my head, my veins -everywhere, really.

I felt like I was falling through the sky, ready to land somewhere hard. But, as we kissed, I was ready to land softly on a cloud.

Instinct took over, my good hand curled up in his hair and tugged. Pete gave a soft groan, and then he pulled back, our lips parting. I licked over my lips, feeling how swollen they were and then I retracted my hand. I sucked in a breath as Pete looked at me, his breathing had gone heavy, "Did I mess up?" I asked him.

He shook his head, "No." He climbed off of me and sat back on the floor beside me. "You're too good at that."

I smiled a bit, "My head's still woozy."

Pete put his hand in mine, "I'm the worst dude ever."

I shook my head, "No, you're not."

"I am, Naomi. I kissed my best friend."

"So what? I kissed my best friend, too, and I still love you unconditionally."

Pete sat up, his hand falling mine, "You mean that?"

I sat up and looked at him, "Of course I do."

"I don't think I've ever loved anyone unconditionally before." Pete mumble to himself.

"You don't have to say it to me," I sat up, "I just wanted you to know how I feel."

Pete was silent, and then he took hold of my hand; "You're gonna owe me $5."

I smiled, "I'd gladly give you that $5 once I'm down that aisle and said "I do", until then, I'm waiting for Tim Roth."

Pete laughed and shook his head, "You're crazy."

"I'm mad." I told him with a small giggle.


Pete returned me home, we actually cut through the backyard, hoping over the fence. He hugged me tightly, and then kissed my lips quickly. He gave a small sigh as he prepared to leave; "Uh, when your dad lets you off probation, I'll show you my apartment. I moved in with Andy; Andy Hurley."

I nodded, "Yeah, okay."

"I'll see you at Chris's then? Soon, hopefully?"

"Yes."

Pete inhaled and then he kissed me again, "You gotta stop me from doing that."

"Nope, sorry." I patted his cheek, "Be good."

He chuckled, "Yes, mom."

I waved to him as he climbed over the fence and disappeared from my sight. I went around the side and up the front porch. As I did so, a familiar car pulled into the driveway. Amy; she climbed out of her car, these big brown sunglasses perched on her face, "Hi, Naomi." She pushed them up so they'd rest in on her head, pushing back her hair.

I made my way down the pathway, going to the mailbox, "Hi. What're you doing here?"

Amy followed me, but stood a few feet away, "Your dad wanted me to check up on you. How's your hand?"

I waved my casted fingers at her, "Just fine."

"The meds still makin' ya weird?" She smiled as she and I kept the same pace up the pathway.

"Just a little, I'm coming down. I got a little throbbin' in my hand."

"Yikes," she hummed a little laugh. "I've never broken anything before. Does it hurt?"

"Not really." I shrugged, "I've broken my arm before, that hurt a lot worse."

Amy grimaced, "Geez!"

"My dad dropped me, so it wasn't entirely my fault." I set the mail on the counter, "Actually, it was all his fault."

"What happened?" She looked intrigued.

"We went to a Yankee's game when I was 4, and he was carrying me out during the last inning, heard the last pitch, got excited and plop," I popped my lips, "Down I went. My arm was like an accordion."

Again, she grimaced, "Dang."

"The cast is somewhere down in the basement, all the kids at my pre-school signed it."

Amy hugged me, "I'm sorry your dad can be so infuriating at times."

I laughed against her shoulder, "It's okay, Amy."

She let me go, her hands holding my shoulders, "Do you need anything?"

"I'm kind of hungry."

She smiled, "Let's go get some lunch."

"Did he say I could leave the perimeter?"

Amy laughed and wrapped her arm around my shoulder, "If he doesn't like that I took you out, I'll just smack him upside the head."

"Great idea." I laughed too.

Amy let me take half a pill before leading the way out to her car. She and I had a little chit-chat before she stopped at a small diner near my dad's company. Amy didn't say anything about it, she put her hand around my arm and led me inside. We sat in a booth across from each other; my head was beginning to get fuzzy again. I was so out of it I was ready to say anything if I had wanted to.

"What's this trouble Lee's been telling me about?" Amy asked quietly after we ordered our drinks.

"Our neighbor," I told her softly. "Pete."

Amy nodded, "Yeah. Your dad told me about him. I'm not here to give you a speech about him, honey, believe me."

"What did my dad say?" I asked her.

"Hmm...he said Pete was a trouble maker. He's known him, well, he's been seeing everything for about 6 years, Naomi," Amy explained. "He knows how much Pete's been in and out of trouble, he's friends with Peter and Dale. And, he doesn't want you to end up 16 and pregnant."

"I get it, but he should know it isn't like that with Pete and I."

"What is it then?" Amy asked curiously.

I bit at my lip, thinking, truly of how to answer, "He's my best friend."

Amy's eyes fluttered and she smiled warmly, "You've never had a best friend, have you?"

"Friends, yes. A best friend, no." I answered. "Pete gets me, Amy, he's...he's like my other half...like," I was feeling at a loss for words.

"Like he's the only person who understands everything in your head." Amy finished for me.

"Yes," I exclaimed softly, "That's it exactly."

"You love him, Naomi?"

I nodded slowly, "Yes, but he has a girlfriend and I know things wont change for a long time. I'm not stupid, Amy, I will not do anything my dad wouldn't approve of."

"Why did you hide it?" Amy was so curious, confused.

"I was..." I chewed at the inside of my lip, "I...I didn't want to upset my dad, y'know? I've been so disobedient with my mom, but never with my dad. Pete, he intrigued me so much and he made me feel as if I was finding something new; I fell in love with him as soon as I saw him."

Amy's lips parted, her red lips still in a warm smile; "That's how I felt when I met Lee, Naomi. It's like a warm shower of happiness and wonder hit you in the face, right?"

I nodded, "Yes."

"Have you done anything with him?"

"We kissed, but that's it, I swear. I'm not even sure if I'd want to have sex with anyone."

Amy exhaled, "I'll be sure to explain to him."

"You don't have to, Amy, I understand his actions. I'm just upset over what he said to me."

Amy's blonde brows furrowed; she was about to speak when our waitress came with our drinks and took our orders. After the waitress waltzed off, Amy looked at me, questioning; "What did he say?"

I began to explain everything to Amy. I was so out of it, I told her the brutal truth and began to cry a bit as I sputtered out the words. Amy had gotten up, sat beside me in the booth and wrapped her arm around my shoulder. I hugged her, my arms around her middle; "It's alright, honey," she said, "It's gonna be okay, I promise."

I managed to stop my whining by the time the waitress came back with our food. Amy sat back across from me and we ate in comfortable silence. By the time we finished, the meds were slowly wearing off; she drove me home and we saw my dad was there.

We got out and Amy put her hand and led me into the house. My dad was on the couch, drinking from a can of soda and looked over when we entered; "Hey! How's your fingers?"

"They're fine." I said. "I'm still woozy. I'm gonna go lie down." I turned to Amy and hugged her swiftly, "Thank you for lunch."

She pecked my cheek, "No problem, honey."

I went upstairs, managing to kick my shoes and began to take my jeans off when I felt the creased paper in my front pocket. It was Pete's note; I pulled it out and was ready to read it. My cheeks burned as I pulled my jeans off and fell onto my bed in just my t-shirt, underwear and socks. I unfolded the note and began to read;

I've read what you wrote about me and I think it's all real. I feel as if what we got is a paradox that I can't really explain. You make me feel different, but all the same. You make my head swim you make me tired, you make me feel like I'm up. I hope this never ends even if there's a storm beginning. I hope I never lose what we got, you make me happy, Naomi. I love you and I wish I could explain the thoughts burning inside my head. You're all I dream about, when I used to dream about being alive.
xopeter

I bit down on my lip, folded the note and set it beneath my pillow. My fingers ran over my necklace, exposing it so I could touch it. I shut my eyes and let sleep over come as I fingered the crooks of my heart.