Take This to Your Grave

Graduation came rather quickly, and it seemed to pass by me in a blur. I wasn't really thinking, I was just living each day in what seemed like a haze. Though, I found most nights missing that rapping at my window. I missed seeing Pete, I hadn't seen him in a few days and it bugged me. Just a small glimpse would've been okay, but so far, not a thing.

While we sat and listened to our principal drone on and on about futures and other annoyances, I looked around at the parents in seats behind us, some on bleachers; we were out on the football field. My eyes scanned everyone; I saw Amy and then my dad; I saw Mike's parents and then my eyes stopped on a familiar face. I held my breath, believing I was seeing things, but I wasn't; he waved at me. He sat at the top of bleachers, by himself, he stuck out a bit. I waved back and turned back in my seat.

Finally, the time came for our little senior class to get our diplomas. I was almost last, way in the back; I swore the principal got tired by the time he got to the V's. As soon as I crossed that stage, I looked up at the bleachers again, seeing Pete still perched there. I gave a small, tiny smile and returned to my seat. The last set of names were called and then we were congratulated; kids threw up their caps, while I went off to find Pete.

I maneuvered through caps and kids, parents, laughter and cries. My eyes scanned the bleachers, but I didn't see him. My body jolted when I felt a hand latch onto mine and pull me along; my feet followed the hand, knowing exactly whom it was. Pete led me towards the bleachers, beneath them and as soon as we were out of sight, he pulled me into his arms and kissed me. My heart thumped in my chest, adrenaline and pure joy soared through me.

He pressed his forehead against mine, the two of us breathing a bit fast; "I'm sorry." He said in a pant.

"I'm sorry, too." I muttered.

He kissed me again, "I wanted to see you before everyone else did. I'm proud of you, you know."

I laughed softly, "Thanks."

He pulled the cap off my head, dropping it on the grass and then combed his fingers through my hair, "Can you see me tonight?"

I shrugged, "I dunno."

He looked around, "Call me, alright?"

I nodded and he kissed me one last time. My hand lingered on his arm as he hurried away; it was as if I had imagined the entire thing. I picked up my cap and started away from the bleachers, looking for my folks.

My dad spotted me immediately and gave me a curious glance. I met up with them, smiling, "Sorry."

My dad didn't question where I had been, he only gave me a hug, while Amy had started to tear up. I blushed slightly, hearing them tell me that they were happy and proud of me. Amy took pictures of me; one with my dad, her; and when Mike joined us, we took one together. I felt that terrible feeling again; I knew that I couldn't live in the dark any longer. I would have to come clean, to some extent, to Mike.

We had gone to eat, but I didn't have much of an appetite. My dad had noticed how out of it I was; "You alright, kid?"

"Yeah, just fine." I replied with a small smile.

My dad smiled back and kissed my head. I forced myself to eat, engaging in conversation with everyone. Once we left, I tried to gather my thoughts; I wasn't sure what was going on in my head.

"Naomi?" Mike waved his hand in front of my face, "You alright?"

I looked at him, "Just fine. Just thinkin'."

He shook his head with a small smile, "You wanna go to a party tonight?"

I looked around and noticed that we were in front of my house; my cap and gown were gone and some loud metal music was playing on his stereo. I blinked, looking at him now, "What party?"

"Just some thing Billy's throwin' for everyone."

"Oh, yeah, okay. Do you want me to meet you there or do you want to pick me up?"

"I'll pick you up." He answered.

I swallowed, "Okay. I'm sorry I'm so out of it...I just can't believe that we graduated."

I was lying. I hated to lie, but I had to. Telling the truth would break his heart.

"It's cool, babe," he kissed my cheek, "See you tonight."

I returned his kiss and climbed out the car. I waved, heading up the pathway and opened the front door. I entered the living room, seeing my dad sitting on the couch; "Hey, I thought you would be out with Mike."

"Tonight we're going to a party. Is that alright?"

He nodded, "Of course, have fun, but don't drink."

"I know." I rubbed the back of neck, "I'm gonna go shower, I have a kink in my neck."

"Alright, kiddo."

I paused upon turning; I turned back, "I'm gonna go see Kate after I shower, but I'll be back so Mike can pick me up."

"Why not meet him there?"

I tweaked my lips, "Yeah...yeah, I'm gonna call him."

I went upstairs and began to undress to shower. I wasn't going to see Kate, of course; I was going to go see Pete. I grabbed my phone just as I wrapped a towel around myself and called Mike. I said that I'd meet him at Billy's -I told him, too, that I was gonna go see Kate. Mike believed me, not questioning it one bit.

I hurried to the shower; I thought about my lie and tried not to let it bother me. It didn't, not really, and I wondered why; it most certainly should have, but it didn't.

Still unsure as to why.


I sat in my car just outside Pete's apartment, biting hard on my lip. There was something holding me back from going in, going up to the door and knocking. I inhaled and made myself get out the car.

I walked up the apartment block and up to his door; I knocked swiftly and waited. A moment later the door opened, slowly; my heart rate picked up when I saw Pete there in just his sweats. My eyes scanned his body, staring at his tattoos; "Hey." I said softly.

Pete's hand stuck out and took my arm, tugging me inside. Without a second spared, his lips were on mine and his hands were on my hips, pulling me closer to him. I couldn't help but to nearly melt against him, my own hands holding onto his arms. His tongue slipped into my mouth, exploring, as if he tried to get as much of me as possible. I didn't mind it at all, my body was his and I didn't care, not one bit.

He pulled back, picking me up, "Wrap your legs around me." He ordered in a soft pant.

I obeyed, not speaking a word; I wanted him back on me, to kiss me. He was back at it, carrying me away to his bedroom; inside, he skillfully kicked the door shut behind him and carried me to the bed. He set me down, but didn't move back, he moved atop of me, his hands pushing up my blouse, his hands rubbing and touching my stomach and slowly making his way to my breasts. His mouth fell from my lips, trailing down my jaw and straight to my neck, kissing and sucking; "You'll leave a mark." I told him, breathlessly.

Pete pulled back, his eyes meeting mine, "I don't care. You're mine."

My stomach fluttered, I did not care at all anymore. It was the lust talking, but I didn't care; I knew it, but the love and lust were too great. His mouth was back on my neck, my hands holding the back of his neck, letting out soft moans, and my fingers massaging his scalp.

I was gonna do it this time. I wanted this.