Destined to Explode

*Bellani*

“Uh . . . I was just wondering if I could talk to Bellani . . . alone?” He questioned. I felt Alex’s hand squeeze mine and I just smiled at him softly and gave him a slight nod.

“C’mon, Ry. Let’s give them a little time alone,” Alex grabbed her hand and began pulling her out the door. She glared at Zack and body checked him as she walked out the door. He stumbled back into the wall before steadying himself and walking towards me. I slide as far away from him as possible while staying on the sofa.

“I deserved that,” he mumbled before actually taking a seat on the sofa. I willed myself to look up at him and actually took in the sight that was before me. Zack was a mess. His shirt was ripped slightly at the collar as if someone had grabbed him by it. His eye slowly darkening and swelling. I knew that was the handiwork of my lovely older brother and I felt bad for him if only for a split second.

“Yeah, you kinda did,” I replied softly almost afraid my voice would betray me. I was afraid that it would show how truly hurt I was by the fact that he had said those words to me. I had known him for so long and despite the fact that we didn’t necessarily like each other, I thought he knew me better than what he was showing. Apparently I had given him more credit than he had deserved.

“I’m really sorry. I had no idea and I didn’t mean what I said. There’s something about you that just pushes my buttons and you don’t even have to try. It’s been that way since high school and I don’t know why. I know Devon really loved you, and you wanna know how I know? Because this is not the first black eye I’ve received for mouthing off about you,” he admitted to me while trying to look anywhere but me. His statement shocked me. I never imagined Devon having a violent or mean bone in his body.

“What are you talking about?” I questioned him having a hard time believing what he just said. I shouldn’t have put anything past Devon when it had come to me though. He literally took a bullet for me.

“It was a couple years ago. Alex brought him on a couple stops on the tour. It must have been right before everything happened. I saw him pull out that ring you have on your finger right now. I don’t know why but something just snapped. I walked in calling you all kinds of names and that you didn’t deserve him. He was slowly getting angrier and angrier and I could tell, but I just wouldn’t shut up. The next thing I know, his fist is flying towards my face. And holy shit man. He could throw an insane right hook. If you ever wondered why he came home from that trip with a broken hand it was cause of me,” Zack responded. Devon had never told me that before. He came home with that cast and had told me some story about falling off the bus when he was drunk. There was a part of me that had never believed him because he was never a clumsy drunk. Even then he maintained this level of grace that I just never had.

“He never told me that. He said he fell of the bus when you guys got him drunk, but you knew him. He was always so graceful and apparently he had your back. Because I swear to God if I had known what really happened you would have had two black eyes, but why are you telling me this? What good does this do? There’s no way in hell I’m forgiving you,” I spat. The anger was slowly sinking back in. He didn’t deserve my forgiveness.

“To show you that I was wrong. That I know I was wrong and I’m sorry. You may not forgive me yet, but maybe you can someday. I’ll make it up to you every day until you forgive me. Go to sleep Bellani. Tomorrow’s a big day,” he responded sincerely before getting up and walking towards the bunks. I stared at the area he just occupied and thought about what he had said. I wanted so badly for him to do what he said he would. But as I got up and walked to my bunk, I couldn’t help but let the doubtful side to me win. Because that’s all life was, a constant disappointment.

The following day I woke up to none other than Ryla crammed into my bunk with me. We had gotten used to sleeping in the same bed, granted it used to be an eastern king and now it was this tiny bunk. Slowly I began to try to decide how I was going to get out of bed finding all of my plans useless. I settled with my last choice and roughly pushed Ryla out of the bunk and onto the floor.

“Holy shit! You little fucker, what was that for?” She asked rubbing her eyes from just waking up. I laughed slightly before stepping over her and gathering my stuff to take a shower and get ready for the first official day of tour.

“Because you were in my way, bitch,” I responded laughing and locking myself in the bathroom before she could respond or come towards me. By the time I had showered and dressed, along with doing my hair and makeup, Ryla was in the front of the bus completely ready as well.

“Took you long enough, princess,” Ryla shot at me from where she sat right next to Alex. They were sitting so close to each other they were basically in each other’s laps. And they always wondered why people thought they were so in love with each other. Without even meaning to, their body language mirrored each other. It was cute in an almost creepy way.

“Perfection takes time, my friend. Maintaining this beauty, requires effort,” I laughed and sat down next to them with my legs stretching across their lap. They both just looked at me like I was slightly insane and dropped it.

“So did anyone actually tell you who we are touring with right now?” Rian asked while wearing a mischievous smile. I got slightly nervous before I shook my head and looked towards the other people in the lounge, which included Matt, Jack, Ryla, and Alex.

“Oh my God, you are gonna flip your shit when you hear this,” Ryla spoke smiling a thousand watt smile. The more they prolonged it the more nervous I got.

“Will someone just tell me already?” I yelled which resulted in a laugh from everyone including Matt which was a slight shocker. They all looked at each other smiling before screaming.

“We are on tour with Of Mice and Men!” They all yelled at the exact same time. I got so excited I literally fell off the sofa.

“Holy shit, no we aren’t! Are they here yet? Can I meet them?” I yelled as I got up and started running towards the door. Before they could even stop me I threw the door open, but it didn’t open as easily as I had expected it too. When it finally opened instead of hitting the side of the bus it slammed into a person.

“Ouch,” I heard someone mumble from the concrete, and saw long skinny jean covered legs sprawled out in front of the bus.

“Oh my! I am so sorry! Damn it! I just got so excited and I ran out the door, I didn’t even think that someone would be here. God I cannot say sor . . . Holy shit, you’re Austin Carlile! Guys I killed Austin Carlile!” I screamed back onto the bus after I had stumbled out and found an injured Austin laying on the cement outside our bus. I fell to my knees next to him with my hands covering my mouth while the rest of the people on the bus came running out.

“Holy shit, Bell. You did kill Austin,” Ryla spoke with slight laughter in her tone. Austin was trying to gain his composure and was rubbing his head and smiling slightly.

“I’m not dead, don’t you worry your pretty little head, I’ll be just fine,” he muttered while sitting up to look at all of us. I was still kneeling right beside him and blushed slightly at his compliment.

“God, Bell. I knew you were excited but shit. I didn’t think you’d maul the poor dude,” Alex laughed while helping me up. Rian was offering his hand to Austin and pulling up the incredibly beautiful and tall man.

“Guys, really I’m fine. But I don’t believe I’ve met you before, I would remember someone as beautiful as you. What’s your name, pretty girl?” He asked as he reached his hand out towards me. I reached out to shake his hand while my left hand went up to my face to cover my smile. That’s when he saw the ring on my finger. I could tell he was instantly regretting hitting on me.

“Well shit. That’s not what it looks like, I promise.” I began, but he just smiled.

“Don’t worry about it. Sorry for hitting on you, I didn’t know you were taken. But he’s a lucky man,” he spoke softly shaking my hand.

“Was. He was a lucky man.” I replied and a look of understanding crossed his face. And with that he didn’t need any other explanation. Looking into his eyes felt so right but also slightly wrong. I was so intrigued by his beautiful brown eyes I didn’t notice the other pair of eyes, glaring from the bus. And just when I thought things were getting better.