Hello

The thing about having the entire gang over for dinner is that they don’t have nearly enough seats at the table for everyone to sit. There are five, one for each of the Curtis boys and the two which their parents used to sit in. Luckily we don’t usually all eat over—they have a very limited income so generally we fend for ourselves. The other thing that makes this a rare occasion is that it’s a school night, which means that usually nobody is allowed over (except for sometimes Johnny and I) until Ponyboy is finished with his homework and then they have to clear out by eight o’clock. I’m not exactly sure what got into Darry tonight but for some reason he broke this rule and sure enough had cooked dinner for all eight of us.

After Darry, Soda, and Pony had taken their seats at the table Two-bit and Steve barged over and took the two remaining seats. Johnny wasn’t the type to fight over a seat, or anything really, Dally didn’t care enough to try, and it all happened to quickly for me to even realize what was going on. If I had I for sure would have pushed both the boys out of the way to fight for one of those last seats, anything to avoid the awkward dinner which was about to take place.

Johnny shrugged and walked back into the living room with his plate, sitting in front of the couch and resting his back against it while Dallas and I sat side by side on the couch. So here I am eating dinner and sweating like a fat man in the Sahara desert, trying to fane interest in whatever happens to be on TV while Johnny and Dally are deep in conversation about something or other and the boys in the other room make lots of noise. I’m intensely aware of Dallas’s leg pressed up against mine just the tiniest bit and just that small amount of contact is driving me crazy.

“I’ll be right back,” Johnny says, pointing towards the bathroom and then heading off in that direction.

I swear I almost impulsively grab the back of his shirt to keep him from walking off and leaving Dally and me alone. Dallas sighs, placing his now empty dish on the arm of the couch and leaning back, his arms behind his head. “So… Allison, what’s your problem lately?” he asks bluntly in his thick New York accent, simultaneously causing me to want to pee my pants and swoon.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about Dallas, I don’t have a problem.” I do a surprisingly good job of getting the words out and acting completely natural.

“Yes you do, you’ve barely said a word to me since I got out of the slammer, or really anyone while I’m around. You always get all sweaty around me and do that thing with your hair,” he says pointing to my hand which is wrapped firmly around a strand of straight jet black hair and twirling it around my index finger. I instantly drop the hair and put my hands in my lap, eyes wide. “I think I know what’s up, so either you tell me or I tell you, which is it?” he says this in that authoritative voice which leaves no room for argument, the same voice which has scared many a person into doing what he tells them to in the past.

“You… do?” I ask, not wanting to tell him first because really, how could he possibly know when I haven’t even told anybody yet?

He shakes his head in frustration. “Of course I do Al, you’re upset with me because I got myself arrested…” he takes out a cigarette and offers the pack to me, I push it back to him and he shrugs, going back to lighting his own. After taking a long drag he continues on, “Honestly, you have a right to be, that stunt I pulled was one of my stupider ones, I should have known breaking into the police station to take my files wasn’t a good idea. And I should have been here to look out for you and Johnny, but you were fine, right?” He wraps his arm around my shoulders and pulls me to him in a one armed hug.

I look at him blankly and allow a small smile to creep up on my face, it’s almost funny how wrong he is but letting him believe that he is right is by far the easiest thing to do. “Yeah, I guess so…” I say sadly. “I just missed you is all.” I shrug, not having to fake the blush which spreads across my cheeks.

“Missed you too kiddo,” he says, punching my arm lightly and handing me his cigarette just as Johnny walks out from the bathroom, returning to his seat. I take a drag off of it, I never smoke on my own, only when the boys are—which granted is a lot of the time, but I definitely need one right now. I smile, experiencing the familiar light feeling of the smoke entering my body and exiting through my mouth again. I always get a little light-headed when I smoke which may not be a great thing but it’s not a bad feeling either. I hand the cancer stick back to Dallas who smiles and gets back into his conversation with Johnny.

Now that Dally thinks everything is resolved between us I’m going to have to try to stop acting so nervous around him again, because I know without a doubt if I continue on like this he will find out the real reason eventually. He’s been with a lot of girls before and knows how to tell if one is into him.



I lay in bed, unable to sleep or get my mind off of Dallas Winston, I want to slap myself. This is wrong, I’m not supposed to like him like this and I just want more than anything to be able to suck it up and have things return to the way that they used to be. Back when I used to be able to tell him things and he told me things in return, it’s weird to think that that was only six months ago. It feels like a lifetime.

Darry kicked everybody out at nine, which was later than usual but early enough for Ponyboy (and the others who have school in the morning) to get a good night’s sleep. For the rest of the night I managed to have conversations with the other boys close by Dally to prove that I was able to talk in front of him, even if I still couldn’t bring myself to say another word to him.

Once the gang was gone Pony, Soda, and Darry went to their respective rooms. I took the couch and Johnny lay down on the floor in front of me with one of the blankets and pillows Darry had brought out for us. We take turns sleeping on the floor whenever we spend the night here. Johnny was out right away and pretty soon the entire house was filled with a deep silence, the kind where you can hear every small noise in the house, and every single cricket chirping outside.

As I lay here I think about going out for a walk, maybe the cool air will wipe away my unwanted thoughts and when I come back inside I’ll be ready to get some sleep. But then I think about how Johnny and Pony had a close call with some socs a while back because they thought they were trying to pick up on their girls. Bob Sheldon and Randy Anderson, total douche bags. Besides, I like to believe my brother and his best friend have much better taste than Cherry Valance and Marcia Porter. They’re both in a few of my classes and while Cherry is sort of pretty she’s also one of the fakest people I have ever met, she likes to pretend she treats everyone equally but really she’s just like every other soc out there. And Marcia is just Cherry’s little lackey, very few redeeming qualities from what I can see. Anyway, after that event which resulted in Ponyboy almost being drowned and Johnny stabbing Bob (who unfortunately survived) I haven’t had any strong urges to go outside late at night.

I’m about to go outside and sit on the porch for a little while when Ponyboy comes out of his room to use the bathroom, he stops at the entrance after turning the light on and looks at me. “You still awake Allison?” he whispers just loud enough for me to hear.

“Yeah, I’m having some trouble getting to sleep, don’t worry about me,” I say, my voice slightly hoarse for some reason.

“Want to come in the room with Soda and me?”

“Thanks for the offer Pony, but I’d rather not get murdered by Darrel,” I chuckle, patting the spot beside me on the couch. “Just come sit with me for a few minutes, I could use some company.”

I sit up to make room for him and he walks over, taking the seat beside me and pulling the blanket over himself. “So why can’t you sleep, is it because of Dallas?” he asks, looking at me with a raised eye brow as if this was common knowledge.

“What do you mean?” I ask a little too sharply, causing Johnny to stir in his sleep.

“Shh… don’t worry Ally, no one else knows.” He puts a hand on my shoulder and gives me a reassuring look. “But I know that you like him, I think it comes from reading a lot or something but I can just tell certain things about people. But the rest of the gang couldn’t be more clueless about this.”

I smile, part of me is happy I have somebody to talk to about all this with. “Yeah, well, what do you think I should do?” I ask. I really must be getting desperate now; this is almost like asking my little brother for relationship advice.

He thinks for a moment, chewing on his bottom lip. “I don’t know, it’s Dallas so it’s nearly impossible to foresee how he might take things. He’s mean and everything but he definitely loves you and Johnny so he won’t be mean to you or anything. But honestly Allison, and this is gonna sound rough, but Dallas kind of thinks of you in the way that you think of me, like a younger sibling. I don’t know because I’m not him, but I’m not sure he’d want to start a relationship with you or anything. I’m sorry, don’t cry Ally,” he says, wrapping his arm around my shoulders and pulling me close to him.

“I’m fine, you were just being honest,” I say wiping away tears with my wrist and shaking my head. “Besides you’re probably right, it’s just a silly crush which I need to just forget about ever happening.”

“I really could be wrong Allison, I wouldn’t give up all hope.” He’s trying to take back what he said, but it’s too late, I know what I have to do. “Listen, go to the bathroom that’s what you came out here for anyway.”

“I can wait, really.”

“Go,” I say, trying to show a bit of a smile to him so he won’t think I’m that upset. “I demand you pee,” I say jokingly.

He laughs and does as he’s told, walking over to the bathroom door—flashing me one last smile and shutting it behind him. Leaving me once more in total darkness.



“The kids such a fucking freak,” Lisa Michaels exclaims, at her lunch table which incidentally is directly behind mine. I share a table with Pony at lunch because Johnny, Two-bit, and Steve are all in different lunches then us. My attention peaks as I hear her high pitched voice and I turn halfway towards her table in order to hear better.

“Who is?” her friend Carly, who obviously wasn’t in the conversation, asks curiously.

“That Johnny Cade kid, he’s in my history class and he like literally never says a word. Plus yesterday Paul came up behind his desk to talk with Kaitlyn, they obviously have a thing going on by the way but I’ll tell you about that later, so anyway—the weirdo fricking jumped ten feet in the air. I swear it was like watching a side show.” My face starts turning bright red in anger and I clench my hands into fists, my nails digging deep into my palms.

“Ignore them,” Pony mouths to me, shaking his head. He knows how bad my anger can get, especially when you’re messing with my friends or family. But what really upsets me about this is that that stupid soc girl doesn’t even know what Johnny’s been through to make him the way he is, not to mention that it was one of them who made him like that. He was fine until Bob jumped him while he was walking home one day, he had scars for months.

“He sounds weird, what’s his problem anyway?” Elizabeth, the girl Lisa had originally been talking to asks.

“I have no idea, but…” she’s looks around herself, and sees me sitting at the table behind her, a small smile spreads across her face and she makes a show of looking at me and whispering as she talks. “I hear him and his sister are a little too close, if you know what I mean.”

Carly lets out a squeal, oblivious to the fact that I’m right behind her. “That’s seriously nasty, she’s fricking disgusting.”

“I know, but honestly, that’s the only pussy he’ll ever get.” They all burst out laughing and with that comment I have finally had it. I stand up, fists clenched at my side and start walking over to them, Pony tries to pull me back but to no avail.

“Do you have something to say to me Lisa, why don’t you say it to my face?” I hiss at her. She instantly turns around—her smile stretching into a full blown grin.

She stands up and steps over the bench so we’re face-to-face. “Oh dear, I don’t have anything to say that you don’t already know,” she says, putting a hand in front of her mouth as if she were perfectly innocent.

“And what is that Lisa?”

Her grin suddenly slips away and her face gets dead serious. “That you and your brother are pathetic loser greasers who fuck each other because nobody else would go near you with a ten foot pole.”

It happens before I even make a conscious decision, one second I’m standing their glowering at her stupid perfect face and then the next my fist is slamming into her nose. “You bitch!” she shouts, grabbing me by the hair and pushing me backwards so my head slams down on the bench behind me. She has one leg on either side of my waist and goes in for a punch which I manage to catch in my hand and pull her up by her hair. Before either of us can make another move Mr. Forester my math teacher has my arms pinned behind my back and is pulling me away while Mr. Lang the vice principal has Lisa.

“In my office, now…” he says firmly, though he’s only looking at me as if all of this is solely my fault.