When Doves Cry


~~I've gone for too long living like I'm not alive So I'm going to start overnight Beginning with you and I~~
The next morning, one half of my brain woke up before the other half did. The half that was still awake was blissfully ignorant of anything going on around me. The half that had woken up, however, was aware of light on the other side of my eyelids and voices some feet away. Suddenly, there was a sliding sound and the light was extinguished very suddenly.
"Calm down," one voice whispered. "And lower your voice."
"Why the bloody hell should I lower my voice?" the other voice commanded rather loudly. The awake part of my brain recognized those voices, and the sleeping part of my brain suddenly woke up.
I sat up slowly, trying to piece together what was going on. The light had been the curtains around the bed opening, the shadows and sliding sound had been someone, Remus most likely, closing them hastily. And the voices belonged to Remus and Sirius, who sounded pretty damn angry.
"You should lower your voice because others are trying to sleep, Sirius." Yes, that was definitely Remus. Trying to reason with Sirius.
"I don't give a damn! You know, I really believed her when she said she wouldn't go out with me because she was worried about ruining our friendship. But now I see it was only because she's been shagging you, and she clearly doesn't want to stop!"
Oh, fuck me in the ear. Sirius had seen me sleeping in Remus's bed and had jumped to the very wrong conclusion.
"First of all, Sirius, it's none of your business who Roxi is shagging. You're not her boyfriend, and she doesn't belong to you. Second of all, she and I are not shagging!"
"Oh, no? Then why is she in your bed, wearing only a t-shirt?"
I looked down at myself, wondering how he knew that. Oh, right. I had apparently gotten too hot last night and kicked the covers off. Which meant my long, naked legs were totally exposed. All things considered, I could see how Sirius would jump to the wrong conclusion. It didn't look all that innocent.
"Why is there so much noise?" I heard a very disgruntled James growl from his bed.
"This is why," Sirius answered. I heard him stomp somewhere, evidently James's bed, and jerk the curtains open. I had a feeling I knew exactly where he'd be stomping over to next. Sure enough, I could hear his footsteps getting closer, and the curtains around Remus's bed suddenly flung open, a raging Sirius standing at the foot of the bed.
"Roxi?" James asked in shock. "What are you--? Hang on! You and Remus??"
Peter, who had also woken up from the noise, was simply gaping at me in silent shock.
"Er, hi," I said awkwardly, suddenly realizing I was in a bedroom full of teenaged boys, and I was only wearing a t-shirt. "So, I'm just gonna go and get dressed..."
"No," Sirius said. "Really, don't bother. We'll all just leave so you and Remus can have some more time alone."
Remus sighed in annoyance. "James, would you and Peter mind leaving?"
"Er, yeah, sure," James said, still looking at me with raised eyebrows. He and Peter left the dorm, going down to the common room so Remus, Sirius, and I could talk in private.
"Sirius, you're being unreasonable. Now shut up and listen," Remus said.
The look in Sirius's eyes was murderous. He opened his mouth to protest, but Remus grabbed him by his shoulders. "Look, you're being an ass and a git. I rarely ever demand that you stop talking and listen to me, but right now you really need to shut the hell up and hear this one thing I have to say!"
Sirius brushed Remus off and crossed his arms, glaring at Remus. "Fine," he said.
"Roxi talks in her sleep," Remus said.
"Yeah, well-- What? How does that explain anything?" Sirius was so confused, he forgot to be angry.
"She only said one thing, over and over last night while she was sleeping. Which, coincidentally, is the only thing either of us did."
I frowned, trying to remember my dreams form last night, and felt a slight blush tinge my cheeks. I knew, without a doubt, what I had been saying in my sleep.
"All right, fine. What did she say over and over?"
"Sirius," Remus said simply before walking out the door.
I was scratching at the back of my neck, looking around the room and avoiding Sirius's gaze. This had turned out to be far more awkward and uncomfortable of a morning than I ever could have imagined.
"You said my name?" Sirius finally asked, all traces of anger gone from his voice.
"Um, yeah," I said. "I guess I was dreaming about you."
"Oh. Er... Cool. So, why are you half naked and in Remus's bed?"
I smiled lightly and finally looked at Sirius. "Because Remus doesn't see me as a half naked pretty girl sleeping in his bed."
"So what does he see you as?"
I shrugged. "That really close friend of his, the one who might as well be a bloke for all the romantic interest he has in her. The one who likes to sleep by his side when she has a lot on her mind because he comforts her."
"How often have you done this?"
"A couple times a month since second year."
"And you two have never shagged?" he asked incredulously.
I laughed and shook my head. "We've never thought of each other like that. I mean, we went skinny dipping together, and it wasn't even awkward."
"Huh," he said, like he couldn't quite understand having a girl sleep in your bed for about four years and not shagging her. "I'm kind of shocked he let you see him naked. He's pretty insecure about his scars."
I nodded a bit sadly. "I know. He almost didn't do it. I had to tell him battle scars are sexy."
"So you went skinny dipping with Moony after calling him sexy? And you still say your relationship with him is purely platonic?"
"What, you don't think he's sexy?" I asked innocently.
"No," he said, "I think I'm sexy."
I laughed and grabbed the pillow behind me, swinging it around to hit him in the head.
"Hey, watch the hair!" he protested, flattening down his hair again.
I simply rolled my eyes. "You're such a girl, Siri."
"If I'm a girl, that makes you a skirt lifter." He smirked at me.
I smirked right back. "Who says I'm not? Maybe that's the real reason I wouldn't date you."
That caught him off guard. "You... But you said... No, you dated Mason! He's definitely a bloke! You like guys."
I laughed again. "Glad you caught on, git."
Sirius rolled his eyes and flopped down on the bed beside me. Everything was fine for a few moments, until I remembered that I was only wearing a t-shirt. And unlike Remus, Sirius was obviously interested in me as more than a friend. Sirius seemed to come to the same realization as me, suddenly turning his head away from me.
"So, er," he said, scanning his mind for anything to say. "You dreamed about me?"
"Yeah. And before you ask, it wasn't dirty."
"What's the point in dreaming about me if you don't get any fun out of it?" he asked, chuckling.
"I was dreaming about you laughing, actually," I said.
"Oh?" he said, rolling over to face me again. "Why me laughing?"
"I love your laugh. Not just any laugh, though. Not the one you give when you do a good prank, or when you're being devious. I love it when you laugh because you're genuinely happy, and things are just good."
"You notice a difference in my laughs?" he asked, shocked.
"Well... Yeah." I shrugged. "I notice lots of things. Not just about you, though. I notice things about all four of you guys. Like, Remus thinks no one notices, but it makes him really happy when we hide in the hospital wing all night after a full moon so we can be there when he wakes up. And Peter sometimes feels like he's just the excess of the group, the one we let tag along just because we feel like it. He's actually pretty insecure about that, but he'd never admit it."
"I didn't know that. Poor Petey. So what about James?"
"James feels responsible for all of us. On the one hand, he's Mister Prankster, carefree and fun. But on the other, he sort of sees himself as a father figure for all of us. He wants to be the one we can turn to for anything. But if you ever called him out on that, he'd deny it. Doesn't exactly fit with his "fun guy" image."
"Do you notice these things about everyone?" Sirius asked, looking like he was seeing me in a whole new light.
"The people I get close to. For instance, Lily does like James. I can tell. But she won't even admit it to herself while he's being a toerag. So James is kind of screwed. I've even noticed things like this about my Slytherins."
"I will never get used to you referring to those rats yours."
"Would you like to know what I've noticed about Regulus?" I asked, closely watching his reaction.
He shrugged and looked away some, feigning disinterest. "I guess. Doesn't really matter to me what he does, though."
"Hmm," I said, knowing he was lying. "Well, for one thing, he loves you more than he'd ever say. You mean a lot to him."
"Well, that's a secret he'll die with," Sirius said, looking like he didn't care. But I knew him too well. He did care. I would even go so far as to say he was glad.
"Sirius," I said, reaching out to put my hand on his shoulder. The action caused the hem of my shirt to inch up, and the motion caught Sirius's attention. Without thinking about it, he glanced down to where the movement had come from. But when he realized it was because even more of my legs had been exposed, his eyes grew very wide and he rolled over again, facing away from me faster than I had thought humanly possible.
"Um, sorry," I said.
"It's fine. But maybe you should put on some pants. Your legs are very distracting."
"Right," I said, getting up to dig through Remus's clothes. I found a pair of plaid pajama pants with drawstrings and put them on, pulling the strings as tight as I could. Remus was pretty skinny, but he was still bigger than me. "Well, they're baggy. But they'll stay up."
Sirius looked at me again, frowning.
"What?" I asked, confused.
"It's just, you still look like you slept with him. You woke up in his bed, you're wearing his clothes. I know you didn't, but it looks like you did."
I rolled my eyes at him. "Jealous, Sirius?"
"No," he grumbled, crossing his arms and not looking at me.
I made a face at his childishness.
"Bugger this," he said, getting up and walking over to his things. He rummaged around for awhile until he emerged with a pair of soft-looking gray pajama pants. "Here, put these on."
"Why?" I asked. "I'm already wearing pants."
"Because I don't like you wearing nothing but Remus's clothes. It makes me feel weird."
I considered pointing out that I was wearing my own panties, but somehow I doubted that would make him feel much better. So I grabbed the pants from him, waiting for him to turn around before I pulled off the pants I was wearing and put on the ones he had given me.
"Better?" I asked somewhat exasperatedly. Actually, I had to admit I liked the pants. They were just as soft as they had looked, and they fit me pretty well.
"Yes," he answered, looking rather content. "You can actually keep those if you want. They're from last year, and they don't fit anymore."
"Great," I said, lightly running my hands over the material. "They're so soft."
He sighed dramatically. "I know. I was so depressed when I realized I'd outgrown them."
"Sirius, are you trying to make me your beard?" I asked in a serious tone.
"My what?" he asked, confused.
"You know, er... The person you use to hide your sexual preferences behind."
My meaning slowly dawned on him and he glared at me. "Oi! Just because I appreciate comfortable pajama pants does not mean I'm a poof! I thought I made that pretty obvious when we were in that broom cupboard."
I was laughing at this point, my hands held up in surrender. "Sorry. I just had to see how you'd react."
My laughter died away when I saw the look in his eyes, that same mischievous look I was all too familiar with. I slowly stepped back from him, trying to prepare myself for whatever devious revenge he had just decided on. With a sound surprisingly similar to a growl, he leapt at me, tackling me back onto Remus's bed. My arms and legs were pinned beneath his, making escape rather difficult.
"All right, you win. I'm sorry I indicated that you might be a poof. Now let me up."
"No," he said. "I'm quite comfy here." He shifted, getting more comfortable while he laid on me, but he still kept my arms and legs pinned.
"I'm never getting up, am I?" I asked in resignation.
"Probably not," he answered cheerfully. "Now, while I have you here, have you thought about what I said?"
I stared at him silently for awhile, chewing on the inside of my lip. "Yes," I finally said.
"Yes, you've thought about it, or yes, you've finally come to your senses and have agreed to date me?"
"Which do you think?" I asked, smiling at him.
He grinned, a beautiful, genuine grin and unpinned my arms so he could cup my face. "Excellent," he said softly before he leaned down and kissed me. This time, I didn't resist or hesitate. I eagerly kissed him back.
"Oi!" a loud voice interrupted us, followed by banging on the door. "Will you two quit talking and let us in? We're gonna miss breakfast!"
Sirius got up and opened the door, glaring at James. "Great timing, mate. I finally got her to agree to go out with me, and all you can think about is food."
There was a cry of delight as James hugged Sirius tightly before coming over to me and crushing me in his arms. "It's about bloody time you two hooked up! Hang on, you two were alone in here for awhile. Did I interrupt something?" He winked suggestively, causing me to roll my eyes and lightly shove him.
"Just a bit of snogging," I said. "And you're right, we need to get ready. Boys, I will see you in about ten minutes."
I left their room and walked into the common room, where Remus and Peter were still waiting. When Remus saw me, he raised an eyebrow inquisitively. I smiled and shrugged, causing him to grin and come over to me. He was about to say something, but James's loud yell interrupted him. "Sirius Black has been chained! Gents, it's now safe for you to leave your ladies alone around him, because he is officially in a committed relationship with Roxanne Dove!"
The common room was rather full at this point, and I suddenly found myself being stared at by every person in it. There was an overall sound of excitement and pleasure, and a few people even cheered. I smiled and shrugged, not really sure what else to do.
"You and he will be good together," Remus said with a smile. "Now, I need to go get ready. And so do you."
"Right," I said, turning and heading for my dorm. I had a smile on my face the entire time it took me to get ready. When I got back down to the common room, the four boys were waiting for me. Sirius walked over and wrapped his arm around my waist, and we headed to breakfast.