We Will Never Be the Same

I held baby Charlotte for the most of the night, she was such a happy, calm baby. She fussed a bit when I went to change her diaper but after that,she bounced around in my lap and played with strands of my hair.

"You're so good with her." Amanda commented, taking a seat next to me on the couch. I looked over at her and smiled,

"She's such a good baby," I looked down at Charlotte and pressed a kiss to her small nose.

Amanda nodded, "She is," She was quiet for a moment, "So I wanted to ask you a favor." I nodded quickly, waiting for her to go on.

"I have a job interview tomorrow, so I was wondering if you could watch her for a couple hours." Amanda had went to nursing school and got her degree but she didn't go straight into getting a job, she got engaged right after graduating and then got pregnant with Charlotte.

"Wow,that's great! I'm happy for you," I grinned, "And you know you don't even have to ask, I'm more than willing to watch her. I need the practice."

"Thanks, Eden." She gave me a side hug, and kissed my cheek, "You're the best!"

I shook my head, " Oh stop." She laughed and shoved my shoulder playfully. I ended up spending the night at Amanda's, and in the morning she got ready for her interview and drove Charlotte and I back to my place.

"So,have fun!" Amanda smiled, handing over Charlotte's bag and Charlotte, who was in her carseat. I said goodbye softly, trying hard to not wake the baby. I made my way up the stairs and unlocked the door quickly.
To my surprise, Josh and the rest of the band were over, being rowdy and playing video games. They all turned to look at me when I closed the door shut.

"Don't be loud." I said quickly before they could mutter anything else. They all shut their mouths and opted to wave. I walked passed the living room and into the bedroom, setting the carseat on the bed and the bag on the dresser. I didn't have a problem with any of the guys but it was a bit annoying that Josh just brought them over.
It wasn't long before one of their loud voices woke up Charlotte. I took her out of her seat and made her a bottle, she drank it while I changed her diaper.

I could go out into the living room but I felt as if it would be awkward.

"Eden! Come out, I missed youuuuu." Dan's voice said from outside the door. He opened the door and smiled brightly.

"Look at you! You're showing now!"

"I'm fat."

"Shut up, Eden." He glared. He walked in and hugged my quickly, looking down at Charlotte who was chewing on one of her toys.

"Who's this cutie?"

"My niece, Charlotte."

He nodded "Hey baby." He cooed, she looked up at him and smiled. Dan smiled right back before looking back at me, "Don't you wanna come out? The guys haven't seen you in a bit, I'm sure they've missed you, too."

"I guess." I shrugged. I scooped Charlotte into my arms, before following Dan out the room.

"Eden!" They all said in unison, minus Josh. It startled Charlotte and she started to whine,fussing around in my arms. I looked over at her and bounced her lightly, trying to calm her.

"Hey, " I said quietly.

"That isn't your baby, right?" Matt joked.

"No," I giggled, "this is my niece, Charlotte."

"Ah, getting some practice in, huh?" Chris said. I nodded.

Charlotte loved all the attention she was getting, she was giggling and making all types of noises.

"Seems like you've got the hang of things, Eden." Dan pointed out.

"Yeah," Matt agreed, "You should be worried about Josh, though." He laughed. I hadn't paid much attention to Josh, only because I knew he wasn't worrying about me. He was probably transfixed on the tv screen.

"Hey!" Josh interjected.

"Dude, have you ever even changed a diaper?"Max asked , raising an eyebrow.

"No."

"Made a bottle?" Max added.

"No."

"Good luck with him, Eden." Max laughed. I was enjoying the time with guys, I hadn't seen them in a bit and it was great to catch up. It wasn't long before they left and I was absolutely dreading being alone with Josh. I had not one thing to say to him. I wasn't even going to ask where and why he left. I wasn't going to talk about the house situation either. I seriously had nothing to say anymore. I got off the couch, with Charlotte in my arms. Amanda had just called me and said she was on her way back.
Charlotte fell asleep in my arms, just right before Amanda called and told me she was outside. I set Charlotte in her carseat and grabbed her bag, heading outside.

"She just fell asleep." I said, putting the carseat into the car and buckling it up.

"Yeah, its her naptime. Thanks again for watching her, Eden."

"No prob!" I smiled.

"Josh back?" Amanda whispered. I nodded, "I don't wanna go back in.

She laughed, "You have to, Eden."

'I don't having anything to say to him!"

"I know, I know. Maybe he'll come to you.

I scoffed, "I highly doubt it."

"So pessimistic," She rolled her eyes, "I'll call you tomorrow, okay?" I nodded and retreated back up the stairs and into the house. I knew Josh wasn't going to talk to me first, so I knew I had to as stupid as it sounded.

"I have an ultrasound tomorrow, you can come if you want." I said, leaning against the edge of the couch. He looked over at me, for the first time today.

"You're an asshole, you know." I added quickly. He sighed and looked away from me.

"I'm fucking having your baby and you think it's okay to just leave and not tell me where you're going-"

"You didn't even fucking come home last night, Eden."

"I was at Amanda's." I defended.

"Yeah? And how would I have known that?" He questioned, raising his voice.

"Whatever, don't try and turn this around on me." I mumbled. He let out a groan and ran his hands through his hair, looking quite stressed.

As if on queue, "You stress me the fuck out,Eden."

I let out a tiny gasp, as girly as it sounded, "What the hell? I stress you out? You're kidding, right? " I laughed sarcastically, "I fucking have a full time job,and I'm the one who's worried about moving into a house and you leaving and avoiding me isn't really helping, Josh."

"I have a job too, Eden."

"Yeah? For a couple of months..." I mumbled.

He raised an eyebrow, "What's your point?"

"My point is I'm the one who's stressed out and you have no reason to be," I said all in one breath, my breathing was uneven now, "I fucking worry daily about the possibility of losing this baby, and all this other crap I have to deal with isn't making me feel any better." With that I left the living room and retreated to the bedroom. I shouldn't be mad right now, I needed to stay calm and relaxed. I made sure to slam the door for dramatic effect. I even locked it, even though I had a feeling Josh wouldn't even bother to try and come talk to me.