We Will Never Be the Same

It had been a week since the girls were born, and after a day or two in the hospital we were able to take them home. So, now here we were, awake at two in morning, trying to stop the twins from screaming their heads off.

"She's hungry." Josh mumbled, his eyes half opened. He walked over to me, and handed me Hanna. I got in a comfy position fed the baby while looking over at Josh and then at Emilia, she had stopped crying but I had feeling that she needed her diaper changed. Josh complained a lot when he had to change diapers, which only resulted in me scolding him for about 5 minutes. It wasn't as if Josh wasn't helping me out, he was just a bit clueless. He whined about what he didn't know what to do, I tried to give him pointers but then he would go off and say he didn't need my help.

My mom said the first month with the babies was going to be the craziest, because not only were there two newborns, but Josh and I had to adjust to the babies schedules. Also, Josh didn't have any experience with babies, like at all. If it weren't for the nurses at the hospital, I'm quite sure he wouldn't know how to change a diaper or swaddle a baby.

"I changed their diapers last." He yawned.

I sighed angrily, maybe a bit dramatically, "This isn't a 'who's turn is it' situation, if she needs her diaper changed, change it!" I snapped, "You act like such a baby, it's just pee." I rolled my eyes. Josh mumbled something indubitable and if I weren't so sleepy, I would pry him about it.

"You're so snappy, Eden."

"At least I don't complain about every little thing." I replied quickly. He glared in my direction for a quick second.

"Well sorry that I'm not fond of changing dirty diapers or waking up every hour to calm down screaming babies."

"What did you think you would be doing?" I asked, "This is what having babies looks like and you better get used to it, Josh. " The last thing i wanted to be doing was to be arguing with Josh, but he had been getting on my nerves lately and I just couldn't help but be a little bitchy.

That's how exchanges between Josh and I went for the next three weeks and eventually Josh got the hang of the everything, so I had to reason to be snappy towards him, he even stopped whining about changing diapers. I'd like to think that Josh and I were on a pretty good schedule. We took turns sleeping during the day because we barely got sleep during nighttime. The girls were also on some sort of schedule, they usually took naps at the same time which was a relief. The sucky thing was, if one twin was quiet and calm it would all be disrupted if the other twin decided to wail.

"Can you believe that they're a whole month old?" I whispered, staring down at Hanna, who was sleeping in my arms, Josh was holding a fussy Emilia, he was failing at trying to feed her a bottle.

"She knows its not the real thing." He sighed, I giggled softly.

"It's seems it was only yesterday that my water was breaking at a damn restaurant. " I continued, "Hey!" I obviously started Josh because he jumped a little, not helping with attempts to put the baby to sleep

"What?" I asked, his eyebrows raised high.

"You never got around to telling me what you wanted to ask me that night." Josh was bit choked up on his words and I thought it was extremely odd.

"It isn't something like you're leaving for tour, right? Because I don't know if I can take care of both of them on my own." I quirked an eyebrow and studied his worrisome expression.

"Oh, my goodness! It is, isn't it?!" I whispered angrily.

"We aren't going on tour anytime soon, chill out." He huffed. "Oh," I said, mostly to myself, I relaxed against the couch and nudged Josh with my knee.

"Sorry," I said sheepishly, " What is it then?"

"I'm not telling you." He scoffed in a playful manner.

"You were going to not that long ago-"

"You'll find out soon enough." He smiled over at me and I wasn't sure if it was because Emilia dozed off, or because whatever he had to tell me was something important.