Beauty in the Breakdown
o n e
Butterflies were present in my stomach as my best friend, Sarah Lincoln, and I loaded up her car with boxes of things we would need to take to our new house in Los Angelis, California. I wasn't sure if they were from excitement or from being nervous about moving out of the house at only 19 years old. My brother was two years older than I was and he still lived at home. I was about to move over 2,00 miles away from my house in the small town of Niles, Ohio to a much larger city.
"I still can't believe you're doing this," Warren told me as he helped load in a much heavier box that possibly held most of my electronics. "I hope you fail and have to come home."
I laughed although I wasn't sure if he was joking or not. Warren had tried moving out before, three months before he turned 20. He had moved in with his girlfriend and her parents so it wasn't like anything big. But he had failed due to fighting, constant trust issues, and lack of good meals.
"Don’t hold your breath," I replied before walking over to my parents and my Aunt Helen, who were conversing with Sarah's parents. I pulled a piece of paper out of my pocket and handed it to my mother. "This is the new address where you'll be sending the rest of my stuff. I'll call you as soon as we get there," I told her.
"It's a day and a half long drive, Tay. You'll probably have to stop and stay at a hotel, so call me from there as well." She embraced me in tight hug. I nodded, hugging her back tightly. I could feel my eyes burning but I held back the tears. When we pulled apart, she wiped her eyes and smiled softly at me.
I hugged my father next. "Be careful and no talking to any strange men, or women," He told me sternly. I nodded, smiling a bit. I hugged him as well, although he held me much tighter than my mother did. I understood. He was a father; they’re over protective of their little girls.
"I still think you shouldn't do this," My Aunt spoke up before taking a drag of her cigarette. "You're not ready yet, you're too young!"
I don't even remember inviting you to see me off. I thought bitterly, pursing my lips before saying, "Well, I just really want to get out of this town."
"Then move to the next town over! There's no need to move all the way across the country!" She exclaimed. "You know, I didn’t move out of your grandmother's house until I was twenty-four."
Yeah, well, I'm not you. I refrained from saying it out loud. Sarah came over and gave her parents quick hugs. She was never really close with them. They were always working so she never spent enough time with to become close. It was actually surprising to see them here instead of at work.
She turned to me. "You ready?" She asked, excitement present in her voice. I could tell by the look on her face, she was ready to hit the road.
"Yeah."
Sarah headed to the car as I walked over to my brother who was texting away on his cellphone. My stomach twisted into knots and the tears I held back earlier were coming back. I knew, out of everyone, I would miss him most. He looked up and put his phone away, then hugged me tightly like my father did. "Have fun, shrimp, and be careful. Don't forget to call and send pictures of your new pad."
I breathed in sharply, a slight smile forming on my lips. "I won't," I told him.
I walked to the car and waved to everyone before getting in. I slid in the passenger's seat of the car and buckled in. The butterflies from earlier doubled as we pulled out of my driveway and left my neighborhood. Sarah turned to me, grinning like a mad man. "You excited?"
I mirrored her grin. "Definitely."
This is going to be a long trip.
The trip to L.A was indeed long, much to be expected since we were driving and it would take a day and a half. In fact, it was the longest trip I had ever taken, minus the one I had went on with my brother and his friends to New York for his 20th birthday. A part of me thought time would fly due to how much fun Sarah and I had in the car but it didn't. We had taken two breaks and we were currently on our third. We had stopped at what looked like a small plaza for travelers. There was a building with bathrooms and vending machines full of snacks, along with tables covered by umbrella's outside.
"I hate driving," Sarah said as she plopped down at one of the tables and threw her car keys on the table. "I thought this was gonna be fun – and don't get me wrong, it was - until about two hours in."
"Well, think of it like this. After this we're stopping at a hotel and then we'll be in LA tomorrow night," I told her, placing a bag of Doritos and bottle of water in front of her. I sat down on the other side of the table facing her, opening my own bag of chips.
"That's still too long," She whined, putting her head down on the table. I rolled my eyes at her behavior. She knew fully well what she was getting into and now she was complaining about it like a child.
My phone buzzed loudly against the table and I quickly picked it up. On the screen it showed a notice from the Tobuscus app on my iPhone. It said that there was a new game uploaded to TobyGames and I bit my lip, my finger hovering over the View Now option.
"What are you getting giddy about over there?" Sarah asked, looking at me as if I had two heads.
"Toby uploaded a new video to his gaming channel."
"Ugh, ew, Taylor. He's old," She commented. My eye brows shot up, returning the look she was giving me two seconds earlier. She noticed, and quickly spoke up again. "I mean, okay, he's hot an all but isn't he like, thirty something?"
"He's twenty-seven," I told her.
"Okay, but that still makes him," She looked up, counting in her head, "eight years older than us."
"You're point?"
"My point," She started, "Is that we were ten when he was eighteen. When he was, like, fifteen – sixteen having sex for the first time, we were eight, playing with Barbie dolls."
"That doesn't matter, Sarah," I told her.
"Whatever, Tay. You have fun crushing on an old man while I'll busy, partying and having a good time."
I chose to ignore her statement and watch Toby's new video. I was angry at her. I had never talked bad about anyone she had a crush on and trust me, she crushed on some raging douchers.
After about a half an hour we headed back to the car. We drove to the hotel in complete silence, neither of even trying to strike a conversation with the other.
"I still can't believe you're doing this," Warren told me as he helped load in a much heavier box that possibly held most of my electronics. "I hope you fail and have to come home."
I laughed although I wasn't sure if he was joking or not. Warren had tried moving out before, three months before he turned 20. He had moved in with his girlfriend and her parents so it wasn't like anything big. But he had failed due to fighting, constant trust issues, and lack of good meals.
"Don’t hold your breath," I replied before walking over to my parents and my Aunt Helen, who were conversing with Sarah's parents. I pulled a piece of paper out of my pocket and handed it to my mother. "This is the new address where you'll be sending the rest of my stuff. I'll call you as soon as we get there," I told her.
"It's a day and a half long drive, Tay. You'll probably have to stop and stay at a hotel, so call me from there as well." She embraced me in tight hug. I nodded, hugging her back tightly. I could feel my eyes burning but I held back the tears. When we pulled apart, she wiped her eyes and smiled softly at me.
I hugged my father next. "Be careful and no talking to any strange men, or women," He told me sternly. I nodded, smiling a bit. I hugged him as well, although he held me much tighter than my mother did. I understood. He was a father; they’re over protective of their little girls.
"I still think you shouldn't do this," My Aunt spoke up before taking a drag of her cigarette. "You're not ready yet, you're too young!"
I don't even remember inviting you to see me off. I thought bitterly, pursing my lips before saying, "Well, I just really want to get out of this town."
"Then move to the next town over! There's no need to move all the way across the country!" She exclaimed. "You know, I didn’t move out of your grandmother's house until I was twenty-four."
Yeah, well, I'm not you. I refrained from saying it out loud. Sarah came over and gave her parents quick hugs. She was never really close with them. They were always working so she never spent enough time with to become close. It was actually surprising to see them here instead of at work.
She turned to me. "You ready?" She asked, excitement present in her voice. I could tell by the look on her face, she was ready to hit the road.
"Yeah."
Sarah headed to the car as I walked over to my brother who was texting away on his cellphone. My stomach twisted into knots and the tears I held back earlier were coming back. I knew, out of everyone, I would miss him most. He looked up and put his phone away, then hugged me tightly like my father did. "Have fun, shrimp, and be careful. Don't forget to call and send pictures of your new pad."
I breathed in sharply, a slight smile forming on my lips. "I won't," I told him.
I walked to the car and waved to everyone before getting in. I slid in the passenger's seat of the car and buckled in. The butterflies from earlier doubled as we pulled out of my driveway and left my neighborhood. Sarah turned to me, grinning like a mad man. "You excited?"
I mirrored her grin. "Definitely."
This is going to be a long trip.
***
The trip to L.A was indeed long, much to be expected since we were driving and it would take a day and a half. In fact, it was the longest trip I had ever taken, minus the one I had went on with my brother and his friends to New York for his 20th birthday. A part of me thought time would fly due to how much fun Sarah and I had in the car but it didn't. We had taken two breaks and we were currently on our third. We had stopped at what looked like a small plaza for travelers. There was a building with bathrooms and vending machines full of snacks, along with tables covered by umbrella's outside.
"I hate driving," Sarah said as she plopped down at one of the tables and threw her car keys on the table. "I thought this was gonna be fun – and don't get me wrong, it was - until about two hours in."
"Well, think of it like this. After this we're stopping at a hotel and then we'll be in LA tomorrow night," I told her, placing a bag of Doritos and bottle of water in front of her. I sat down on the other side of the table facing her, opening my own bag of chips.
"That's still too long," She whined, putting her head down on the table. I rolled my eyes at her behavior. She knew fully well what she was getting into and now she was complaining about it like a child.
My phone buzzed loudly against the table and I quickly picked it up. On the screen it showed a notice from the Tobuscus app on my iPhone. It said that there was a new game uploaded to TobyGames and I bit my lip, my finger hovering over the View Now option.
"What are you getting giddy about over there?" Sarah asked, looking at me as if I had two heads.
"Toby uploaded a new video to his gaming channel."
"Ugh, ew, Taylor. He's old," She commented. My eye brows shot up, returning the look she was giving me two seconds earlier. She noticed, and quickly spoke up again. "I mean, okay, he's hot an all but isn't he like, thirty something?"
"He's twenty-seven," I told her.
"Okay, but that still makes him," She looked up, counting in her head, "eight years older than us."
"You're point?"
"My point," She started, "Is that we were ten when he was eighteen. When he was, like, fifteen – sixteen having sex for the first time, we were eight, playing with Barbie dolls."
"That doesn't matter, Sarah," I told her.
"Whatever, Tay. You have fun crushing on an old man while I'll busy, partying and having a good time."
I chose to ignore her statement and watch Toby's new video. I was angry at her. I had never talked bad about anyone she had a crush on and trust me, she crushed on some raging douchers.
After about a half an hour we headed back to the car. We drove to the hotel in complete silence, neither of even trying to strike a conversation with the other.