Better Than Me

"Hey!"

The shout rang out over the other sounds surrounding them, causing both Corinne and Riley to look up. David was smiling as he weaved through the people heading for the exits with Cody on his heels. Riley had sent David a message via Facebook from the plane, ordering him to be at the airport to get them at six-fifteen on the dot. And here he was.

Riley felt an answering smile on her lips. She ran forward and leaped into David's arms. With her arms linked around his neck and her legs wrapped around his waist, she was left vulnerable to the smack that Cody aimed at her ass.

"Cody!" she squealed in protest.

Cody grinned and darted away. David and Riley watched as he practically tackled Corinne, his enthusiastic greeting sending them into a man in a business suit and earning them an annoyed glower.

"Sorry," Corinne apologized, scowling at Cody.

David, still carrying Riley, ambled up beside Corinne and Cody. "Hi, Cori."

"Hi, Dave."

"Are y'all ready?" Cody questioned, picking up Corinne's suitcase.

The girls nodded.

"I can't wait to see Bluegrass's face when we show up with y'all," Cody said, hoisting a duffel bag that belonged to Riley over his shoulder. "He is going to freak."

"Can I put you down now?" David asked Riley.

She clung more tightly to him, resting her head on his shoulder. "No."

"I've got to help--" he started, but Corinne interrupted.

"Cody and I can manage," she said, lifting the only remaining piece of luggage--Riley's suitcase.

David shook his head. Riley smiled sweetly.

"You shouldn't act so disappointed, Davo," Cody said. "I'd trade positions with you any time."

"Let's go," David urged. "I told Jacob we'd be there by seven. It's lucky we're playing at Zydeco tonight, or we'd be fucked for load-in."

The four of them walked out to David's 4-Runner. The girls' luggage went in the open space behind the backseat, alongside some pieces of David's kit. Riley was given the passenger seat because David insisted he'd rather have a hot girl up front than Cody.

"If y'all are hungry, we'll go eat as soon as we finish loading in," David said, twisting around to check behind the vehicle before backing out of his parking space.

The drive to downtown Birmingham didn't take long. They were pulling in to the back lot of Zydeco a mere thirty-five minutes later. The van was already there. As David removed the key from the ignition, Jacob emerged from the van. He was obviously irritated.

"Sorry we're late, man," David said, stepping out of his 4-Runner and closing the door. "We had to go get some friends."

Jacob muttered a response that Riley didn't catch. Cody had joined David and Jacob. He said, tone teasing, "Don't act so thrilled, Bluegrass. They only came all the way from California to see us."

Jacob's attention shifted to David's SUV. Riley and Corinne climbed from the vehicle. At the sight of Riley, a smile graced Jacob's lips. He approached her and bent slightly to slip his arms around her waist. Riley rose to her tiptoes, encircling his neck with her arms. She discreetly pressed her face into his silky jet-black hair.

"Hello, Cori," Jacob said, hesitantly releasing Riley and hugging Corinne. Joseph and Todd pushed through the back door of the club, ready to help with load-in.

"There's a patio in the front," David informed the girls. "Y'all can hang out there if you want."

Riley and Corinne rounded the building and ascended the wide stairs to the well-lit area that was outlined with an intricate metal railing. There were only a few wrought-iron tables in the expansive space. The girls chose the one farthest from the front entrance.

"You okay?" Corinne inquired.

Riley nodded. Last night, after Andy had vanished into the darkness, she had returned to the hotel. She had stayed up for hours and Andy had never shown up. Her night had been filled with a restless sleep and much tossing and turning. She had still been alone in the room this morning when she'd received her wake-up call at eight-thirty a.m.

She hadn't really been surprised. She had given Andy no choice. He didn't know exactly what was going on with her, but he was backing off to let her sort it out on her own, realizing that he couldn't help.

Luckily, Corinne had been inclined to be sympathetic today. She hadn't sided with Andy. She hadn't scolded Riley about how stupid she'd been, or demanded to know why Riley had done what she'd done. Corinne had accepted the same thing that Andy had accepted: Riley had her own personal shit she was dealing with and there was nothing she could do. Corinne wished that Riley would talk about it, yet she knew that she wouldn't. Not for a while, at least.

Riley and Corinne sat in companionable silence, occasionally making idle comments about nothing in particular. They wondered aloud what songs Lynam would do tonight and Riley remembered that she'd been going to request that they play "Letting Go."

Finally, the band members filed out of the front door.

"Cody and I are going to eat," David announced. "Are y'all coming?"

"I've already had dinner," Jacob explained as both girls glanced at him, Riley's brow lightly furrowed. "I had to do something while they were on their mystery errand."

"I'm gonna go with David and Cody," Corinne said.

"I'm...not that hungry," Riley said, determinedly avoiding Jacob's eyes. This wasn't entirely true; however, she really wanted the time with Jacob.

Cody and David headed for the stairs. Corinne paused. She hugged Riley and whispered in her ear, "I'll bring something back for you."

God, Corinne knows me so well. Riley gave her best friend a hard squeeze. "Thank you."

Corinne waved to Jacob and hurried after David and Cody.

"Lying to get me alone?" Jacob said, quirking an eyebrow.

"It wasn't a lie." I seem to be saying that a lot lately, Riley observed miserably.

Jacob lowered himself into the chair across from her. He was studying her face and she had the sensation that he could read every thought and emotion as if they were his own. She fidgeted.

"How are you?" he queried.

"Have you ever had a period in your life where everything went wrong at once?"

"What happened?"

"I just don't know what I'm doing anymore." Riley raked her fingers through her hair and sighed. "My career is right where I want it to be and I thought my relationship was, too."

"But it's not."

"No, it's not. Every since you and I had that talk about the future and marriage, I've been trying to figure out what I want, where my life is going. I've been asking myself over and over if I can spend the rest of my life with Andy."

"Riley." Jacob's voice was gently reproving. "You can't plan for everything. Sometimes, you just have to live and let things happen as they happen."

"I know."

"So, why are you over-thinking your relationship with Andy?"

"Because..." Riley ducked her head to hide the tears that were stinging her eyes. Something at the back of her mind had been nagging her for days, something that she had barely admitted to herself. How was she supposed to say it out loud? Once the words were out there--once someone else knew--that made it real.

"Riley?" Jacob took her hand, linking his fingers with hers. "What is it, darlin'?"

"I was asking myself the wrong question," she murmured, staring at their clasped hands. She reluctantly met his eyes. "I was asking if I could handle a future with Andy."

"What's the right question?"

"Can I handle the present with Andy?" A couple of tears slipped down her cheeks. "I'm not certain I even want to be with him anymore."

Surprise flickered across Jacob's face.

"He was so mad when he found out Cori and I were coming to Alabama." Riley used her free hand to wipe away her tears. "I knew he would be, so I didn't tell him until last night." She sniffled. "It looked bad. I had to be in Houston on Tuesday to interview Myles Kennedy. My boss had given me the rest of the week off. I flew to Missouri Tuesday afternoon. The girls and I were going to stay with the guys and go back to L.A. on Sunday."

"But you changed your mind."

Riley nodded. "I had the time off from work and I wanted to see you, David, and Cody. I talked Cori into coming with me. She told Christian and he spilled the beans before I'd told Andy." She shifted guiltily. "I was going to leave without saying anything about Alabama. He would have assumed I was going home to work on transcribing the interview."

"Cori's honesty got you caught."

"Yeah. She was right to tell CC, though. I should have told Andy." Riley frowned. "I didn't want to hear him accuse you..." she trailed off.

"He's still set on the idea that I want you?" Jacob said.

"Yep. And now, he's accusing me of acting suspiciously. Apparently I've been acting differently since the weekend of the reunion."

"Have you?"

"Not that I'm aware of."

"Well, he believes that I'm the problem, so it would make sense for him to pinpoint the moment that everything changed as the moment when you and I met again."

Riley again focused on her small hand cradled in Jacob's larger one.

"You have to talk to him, Riley," Jacob said softly. "You have to tell him everything."

"I know."

"Try to let it go for tonight," Jacob encouraged her. "I don't want one of our rare opportunities to see each other to be spoiled."

"Alright." Riley smiled at him. "On one condition. You have to do 'Letting Go' tonight. Oh, and 'Sister Babylon.'"

"Jeez, you're so demanding!" Jacob stood and pulled Riley to her feet. He dropped her hand, draping an arm over her shoulders instead. "But you've got it. Anything for you, darlin'."

**********

"You don't have to be beautiful to turn me on/I just need your body, baby, from dusk till dawn/You don't need experience to turn me out/You just leave it all up to me/I'm gonna show you what it's all about," Cody sang, helping Jacob with one of his cabinets.

"We don't need a repeat of your performance, Prince," David called, setting one of their stage lights into an equipment box.

"You don't have to be rich to be my girl/You don't have to be cool to rule my world," Cody continued.

"Cody!" David barked, firing a piece of one of his drumsticks at Cody's head. "Shut. Up!"

Corinne yawned and rested her head on Riley's shoulder. "Wake me up when they finish."

"Which will be never if they don't quit yapping," Riley said loudly enough for the guys to hear.

She earned three middle fingers for her trouble.

"I did both of your songs for you," Jacob said. "So hush."

"Now I wish we'd rented a car," Corinne complained.

"What hotel are y'all staying at?" Jacob asked.

"We're not staying at a hotel," Riley said. "We're crashing at Dave's."

"Unless y'all take so long loading out that we have to go straight to the airport from here," Corinne added.

"Is she always like this?" Cody queried of Riley.

Riley grinned. "You should see how fast BVB's crew can load their shit. It's like watching the crews at a NASCAR race."

"Time is money," Corinne said.

"If y'all are that worn out, we can go as soon as I get my kit loaded into the car," David offered.

"Yes, please," Corinne mumbled through a yawn.

David and Joseph had soon finished breaking down David's kit and had stashed it back in the 4-Runner. While they worked, Riley went over to say goodbye to Jacob.

"I should be in L.A. again in a couple of weeks," he said.

"Fantastic."

He hugged her and brushed a kiss across her cheek. "Remember what I said. If you need me after you talk to Andy, you know how to get ahold of me."

Riley nodded.

"C'mon, bitch!" Corinne called from the doorway. "I'm ready for bed!"

Riley hugged Cody and walked briskly to David's SUV. Corinne was dozing when they turned into the driveway of his home. He scooped her into his arms and toted her inside.

Once Riley was curled up in David's guest bedroom with Corinne asleep beside her, she began thinking again.

Jacob's words were replaying over and over in her mind: "You can't plan for everything. Sometimes, you just have to live and let things happen as they happen."

He was right, of course. She did need to consider her future, but at the same time, she couldn't let what might happen rule her present. She had told Jacob that she wasn't sure she wanted to be with Andy anymore. Was that true? Or had she reached that conclusion based solely on the stress of attempting to figure out if their relationship had a future?

Riley had always held the opinion that a relationship that was going nowhere was pointless, a waste of time. But how can you know whether or not the relationship is going to go somewhere? If Riley convinced herself that she didn't want to marry Andy, or that Andy would never want to get married, she was also convincing herself that they were done. She could be wrong. She didn't know what she wanted and she couldn't read Andy's mind.

"You can't plan for everything," Jacob had said.

She couldn't decide that her relationship with Andy was over until it was actually over. And who knew when that would be, if ever?

I need to fix things with Andy, get our relationship back on track, Riley realized.

She had freaked out after the marriage discussion with Jacob. That hadn't been Jacob's intent. Obviously, the idea of marriage had been hovering at the back of Riley's mind, just waiting to make its grand appearance and wreck her life.

I'll apologize to Andy next time I see him, Riley decided. The apology had to be delivered face to face. It meant more that way, and Andy deserved nothing less after a year and five months. Riley wasn't going to hide behind a text or a phone call. That was cowardly.

The apology will make everything normal again, and I'll be able to see the truth, she reasoned. If I'm still unhappy with him, then my doubts about us are NOT just a knee-jerk reaction to the talk with Jacob and all of the recent arguments with Andy. If I'm as happy with him as I've always been, I'll quit worrying about the future and just let things happen as they will.

Now that that was settled, Riley closed her eyes and let herself fall asleep.