Better Than Me

Riley had called her mom while sitting on a bench and staring out over the calm water. She hadn't talked to Mrs. Winters since she'd visited her parents with Jacob.

Riley finally spilled her guts about her personal life, at least in regard to the Andy situation. She wasn't about to add in the complications that Jacob had brought to the table.

Mrs. Winters did what Moms do best--she listened. She didn't try to advise her daughter because she knew Riley didn't want advice. It was the way their relationship had always worked: Riley would talk herself into a plan of action, neither needing nor requesting Mrs. Winters' input. Mrs. Winters had learned early on that she had to let Riley do what Riley thought was best. Her role was to be there to celebrate Riley's successes and to comfort her in the aftermath of her failures.

Two hours later, Riley hadn't discovered a solution to either of her problems, but she still felt better. Pouring out any portion of the drama that was her life was like extracting poison from her veins. There was a sense of relief that yet another person she could trust was helping her to bear the burden. She wished she could give her mom a portion of her Jacob problems, too.

Best not pile it all on in one conversation, she thought. She said goodbye to her mom, pocketed her cell, and stood up. She had no idea what she should do, she only knew that she couldn't sit here all day.

Riley tread the increasingly familiar path to the hotel where she, the Lynam guys, and their crew were staying. She wondered if Jacob would be in her room. He'd had the key when they parted ways earlier.

Riley's heart was pounding nervously as she approached the door. She licked her lips and knocked lightly.

The door was pulled open. Riley was glad to see that it was Jacob on the other side; however, she was also filled with reluctance at the sight of him. She was losing control in this relationship, her attraction to Jacob growing despite how she fought it. She didn't like being at the mercy of her emotions.

"We need to talk," Jacob said, turning away from her and walking deeper into the room.

Nothing good ever follows those four words. Riley forced her feet to move, stepping across the threshold. She shut the door quietly behind herself.

Jacob was leaning against the wall on the far side of the room, right beside the balcony door. His arms were crossed over his chest, as usual. Riley perched on the edge of the nearest bed. This left plenty of space between them.

"I'm sorry," Jacob said after a long pause. "I shouldn't have lashed out like that this morning, especially in front of David and Cody. What I told them...it wasn't mine to share, and I apologize."

Riley waited, sensing a "but" coming.

"But," Jacob continued, his eyes fixed steadily on her face. "I'm not sorry for being angry and frustrated, and I'm not sorry for how I feel about you."

"Jacob--"

"Don't, Riley," he cut in, grimacing slightly and looking away from her. "You don't understand what it's been like. I knew you were taken that first night and that knowledge should have prevented even the most mild attraction from developing. I don't waste my time on people I can't have. But you took me by surprise and before I even realized it was happening, I wanted you."

Riley winced as her nails dug into her palm. She had clenched her right hand into a fist without even being aware that she was doing it. The fingers of her left hand were fidgeting restlessly with a loose thread on the comforter.

"You called me last Monday and I was excited to hear your voice," Jacob said, still not looking at her. "I answered the phone, only to hear a heartbroken female that needed a friend. It was my own fault, though. I had kept the friendship alive. I had vowed to myself that I wouldn't interfere in your relationship. I had convinced myself that I could be that friend."

His tone was bitterly amused, as if he was mocking his own ignorance. Riley wanted to make him stop speaking, but she figured if he could handle admitting all of this, the least she could do was listen.

"And then, you show up here," he went on. "I had to remind myself that you had just ended a relationship, that even though you were single, I still couldn't have you. I had to be the friend. I had to be the shoulder to cry on."

He sighed, his gaze finally returning to her. "I didn't sleep at all last night, Riley. You were laying there with your hair spread across the pillow and a small smile on your lips--a smile that I put there--and it was torture. The possibilities kept me awake, the temptation to feel you against me and hold you in my arms." He frowned. "I don't think I can do this."

Riley lifted her eyebrows. "Is it my turn now?"

Jacob nodded.

"I only ever viewed you as a friend while I was with Andy. I mean, I noticed things about you, things that would have been appealing if I'd been in the market for a romantic involvement. I couldn't deny that you had some kind of affect on me, but...I convinced myself that it was nothing." Riley bit her lip. "This morning, it really hit me. I'm single. Andy and I are over. I can fully appreciate all of those things I noticed about you."

Jacob was watching her, a guarded expression masking his lovely features.

"Jacob." Riley gave him a pleading look. "I can't. You're my friend and I don't want to ruin that. You would only be a rebound."

"What if I don't care?"

"It would be worth ending the friendship for something that we know isn't going to last?"

"It doesn't have to be like that, Riley. We know we get along. We have a lot in common. We're attracted to each other. This isn't a random mistake you're stumbling into blindly. We've been heading for this for a while." He pushed away from the wall and came toward her. "Tell me you didn't enjoy what happened at Cori's birthday party."

"I didn't know it was you."

"But once you found out it was me, did it take anything away from those minutes in that hallway?" He was standing over her now and she stared up into his startlingly blue eyes, recalling the breathless anticipation he'd stirred in her in the dimly-lit hallway.

"No," she murmured.

Jacob reached for her hand and she let him tug her to her feet. "We're at an impasse. I know we can't be 'just friends,' and you know we can't be anything more. The question is, how would you rather crash and burn?"

Riley's pulse kicked into overdrive as his hands rested on her hips. She knew what he was asking: were they going to do nothing while the friendship disintegrated, or were they going to give themselves over to the fire threatening to consume them?

"It's your decision, Riley, but I get to show you why my way is better."

Riley was almost certain she'd quit breathing. Jacob raised a hand, gripping her chin and tilting her face so that he could capture her lips in an urgent, heated kiss.

Riley hesitated. All of the reasons not to do this raced through her brain. In this case, however, her senses won. She didn't give a damn why this was wrong. His mouth was firmly against hers, one hand holding her chin and an arm sliding around her waist. His feather-soft hair tickled her face and he tasted like toothpaste.

Riley shifted to fit their mouths together more comfortably, tangling her fingers in his silky jet-black hair. She parted her lips, tentatively sending her tongue to meet his. Jacob made a sound deep in his throat and kissed her even more forcefully.

Riley had every intention of dragging him onto the bed and submitting to him completely, allowing this to go wherever he would take it. But a knock on the door interrupted them.

"Hey, Bluegrass," David called. "We need to get to the club pretty soon. It's already after six and we've gotta put in some extra time since we're never in Ohio."

"I'll be ready in a few minutes!" Jacob called back, trailing his fingertips along Riley's jaw line.

"Okay. Is Riley back yet?"

"Yeah!" Riley replied. "I'm here."

"Good. I hope y'all have made up."

Jacob quickly covered Riley's mouth with his hand as a giggle escaped her. Grinning, he addressed David. "We're working on it."

"I'll leave y'all to it, then. See you in a bit."

Jacob uncovered Riley's mouth. "Way to almost get us busted."

Riley shrugged. "You know David won't care. In fact, he and Cody will probably be thrilled that you and I are getting along so well."

Jacob bent down to give her a peck on the lips. "Come back to Alabama with us."

"If you insist." She smiled as he kissed her again before letting her go and walking into the bathroom.

For once in her life, she wasn't going to overthink everything. She was just going to let it ride and see where she ended up.

She jumped, startled, when her cell suddenly emitted "Die For You."

Andy. She dug her cell out. His name and number were on the screen. Riley briefly considered answering it. Then, she hit the "ignore" button and tossed her cell onto the bedside table. Humming, she began rummaging in her suitcase for something to wear tonight.

**********

Corinne was in the kitchen, contemplating the contents of the freezer and attempting to choose something for dinner. Nothing that she had was really appealing to her, but she didn't want to go out, either.

She let the freezer door swing shut. She could always call Sammi or Piper and ask them to come over and bring food. If Riley had been in town, Corinne knew she could have her favorite Chinese dish here in forty-five minutes or less. But Riley was in Ohio and judging by the last conversation the two girls had had, Riley was having a magnificent time. She definitely wasn't dwelling on Andy.

Corinne smiled. She was glad Riley was relaxing and enjoying herself. According to Christian, Andy was doing the same thing: he'd gone out with Ashley for the last couple of nights.

"And you know why Ashley hits the clubs," Christian had said dryly. "I'm sure he's encouraging Andy to take up his favorite hobby."

Corinne hadn't told Riley this, of course. Even though they were broken up, it would still bother Riley to hear that Andy was messing around with groupies/bar sluts. Corinne was encouraging Riley's attraction to Jacob. Once Riley was involved with someone else, she wouldn't care as much about what Andy was doing with his freedom.

Corinne shook her head to clear it of these thoughts and reached for the freezer door again. She really needed to pick what she wanted to eat.

Her concentration was shattered when her cell rang. The song was "Rock Star" by Nickelback, which was the ring tone she'd set for all of the members of Black Veil Brides that weren't Christian.

Corinne went into the living room and grabbed her cell without checking to see who it was. "Hello?"

"Hey, Cori." Andy's voice was low and mildly apprehensive.

Corinne was a bit surprised to hear from him. "Um...hi, Andy."

"How are you?"

"Fine. You?"

"Eh, I'm alright." There was a pause, then Andy said, "So. Have you talked to Riley lately?"

"I talked to her last night. Why?"

"I was just wondering if she was okay. I tried to call her earlier and she didn't answer."

Corinne rolled her eyes. "What did you expect, Andy?"

"We didn't end on a bad note," he said defensively. "I thought we could at least be civil. Plus, I need to talk to her."

"About what?"

"That's none of your business."

"Whatever. Is that all, Andy? I'm in the middle of making dinner."

"Has she seen Jacob since we broke up?"

Corinne had the urge to hang up on Andy. "That's really none of your business."

"Cori, tell me the truth," Andy said. "Did she ever mess around with him while we were together?"

"NO!" Corinne snapped, practically yelling. "She didn't! She loved you and only you. But you fucked that up by not trusting her!"

"What was I supposed to do, Cori? It was written all over his face that he wanted her! It wasn't impossible that he had seduced her. He's exactly the kind of guy she likes."

"It was impossible, you fucking idiot! She had you! It doesn't matter what kind of guy Jacob is. She quit looking at other guys the instant she met you. Why do you not get that?"

Andy sighed. "I just...I lost it. She's so perfect. I was scared of losing her."

"And now you have."

"Will you please persuade her to call me? She'll listen to you."

Corinne gritted her teeth. "I'll give it my best." But not until she gets back from Ohio, she added in her head.

"Thanks, Cori."

Corinne mumbled something and hung up. Andy had totally ruined her mood. Now, she wanted a drink more than she wanted food. She hurriedly dialed Sammi's number.

"Yes, lovely?" Sammi said on the second ring.

"Let's go get drunk tonight."

"Okay. The normal place?"

"Yup. I'll call Piper and I've got to eat something on the way. I'll see you there in, um, an hour?"

"See ya."

Corinne slipped on her shoes, found her keys, and strolled out of the house.