But I Swear to God I'm Gonna Change the World

**A few weeks later**
"Dad, I hate this place. I've been here for three weeks now and I don't have any friends. now it's Winter break and I'm most likely going to spend it stuffing my face with cookies and hot chocolate. I'm gonna be even fatter and I definitely won't have any friends." I was sitting on the couch of my Dad's friends house with a cup of hot chocolate in hand.
"Oh come on, Selene. It's not that bad. You have a friend. You have Phil," my Dad said, flipping through channels on the TV which was too big in my opinion.
"Phil? Really? I've talked to him twice. Oh yeah, we're real good friends." I rolled my eyes and sipped my hot chocolate, which was basically just chocolate milk now. I had been hiding my thoughts for three weeks now, but I can't just pretend I love it here when in reality I'm crying into my pillow every night. People hate me here and I have no one to talk to about it. I mean, Vic's ignoring my calls, so the one person I can usually count on to be there, isn't there. It's not fun and I want to go home.
"You and Phil are going out tonight. Not necessarily as a date, but you guys have plenty in common. You will be great friends."
"Dad... You know how I feel about people.." I sighed.
"You'll be fine, I promise," he reassured me. I stood up and walked to the kitchen. Once I rinsed my cup, I walked upstairs to bedroom my dad and I shared, him on the bed, me on the futon. I glanced at my phone, sat on top of the nightstand. I sighed, picked it up and dialed Jaime's number, knowing Vic wouldn't answer.
"Hello?" Jaime's voice rang in my ear.
"Um. Hey.." I replied, nervously.
"Sel? Hey! How're you doin' in Ohio?"
"Not very good. I hate it here. The people hate me and I hate them just the same. It's so hard not being around you guys, it's not normal to wake up and realize that I can't talk to anyone as I please."
"I'm so sorry. You know I am always here, Selene. I'm not as good as Vic with advice, but I can try."
"About Vic.. Do you..do you know why he's not replying to my texts or answering my calls? I just need to know why and then I will be fine. But, if he thinks for one second that I moved away for myself, that's not true. I would do anything to move back. I never stopped loving him, and I don't plan on it soon..." I choked the words out.
"He's going through a tough time, tougher than anyone expected. I keep trying to talk to him, but he just keeps saying 'I loved her, she left, I miss her' and the such. He knows that it was your Dad that made you move, but he doesn't want to be reminded of you right now, not that he doesn't love you, it would just make him fall deeper into whatever state of mind he's in."
"I love him so much, Jaime.. I..I just don't know how long I can go without talking to him, y'know? And I hate my Dad for it, I do. But, there's nothing I can do about it. If my Dad doesn't want me to move back to San Diego, fine. If Vic doesn't want to talk to me, fine. I just want them to know that it's tearing me up on the inside." I bat my thick eyelashes, knocking away the tears swelling in my eyes, and tried to choke down the sob building in my throat.
"It's okay, Sel. Everything will be okay, I promise. There's no way Vic can go longer than a few weeks without talking to you. And as soon as you turn 18 you can legally move away from Ohio and come back to SD with us. You just have to hang in there, okay?"
"Okay.. thanks Jaime, really," I said, sincerely.
"Anytime. Now, I have to go because my Mom want's me to help her."
"Alright. Bye Hime."
"Bye, Selene." I sat my phone on the bed and laid down, resting my head on the bed and covering it with a pillow. Yeah, Jaime explained why Vic wasn't answering, but it still wasn't a positive reason. I stopped holding it back, I just started crying. It was more than just the fact that I moved. It's that I lost my boyfriend; my best friend, actually. It's the fact that I can't function right without him. He was my rock, the only thing I could fall back on when everything has crashed and crumbled at my feet. He was my Vic. I had hurt him by moving, and that had made it hurt me even more. It wasn't meant to hurt him, but it did and I couldn't do anything about it. A hole had been ripped through my chest, where my heart should be. Now it is emptiness, nothing. There's no need for a heart without him. What to pump blood and keep me alive? Why would I want to stay alive without him? What is my point in life without him?

I lay there for about 4 hours; crying, sleeping, having nightmares, and just staring at the ceiling. I hoped my father would hear my cries and just let me go home, but instead, he knocked on the door harshly.
"Get dressed. Phil's home from band practice and you're going to dinner. Be ready in 15!" he yelled from the other side of the door. I climbed off the bed and went over to my box of clothes. I picked out a random shirt and some jeans, not really caring what I wore. I pulled out two socks that didn't match and put them on too. Standing in front of the mirror, I wiped at my swollen eyes and stared at my red nose and puffy lips. It was obvious that I had been crying, so I just took a brush to my hair and made it look presentable. I slipped on some shoes and walked downstairs. Phil was sitting on the couch next to his dad and my dad was sitting in the chair, watching the football game. His eyes didn't even leave the screen as he told me to have fun and to be careful. Phil walked me out to his car and we rode in silence to the mystery restaurant.