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It's Not Like It Hurt That Much

It's not like I could avoid you forever.

I continued to catch up with Chris and Lydia without interruptions, or more easily put, seeing Tony. It was 8:15pm and I decided to head back to my apartment and finish unpacking the last of my moving boxes.

"It was nice seeing you, Chris, and wonderful meeting you, Lydia. I hope we can do this again!" I receive hugs from the pair and headed off to door. On my way out, I knew what was about to happen, and I prepared myself as best as I could. Once I walked outside, I heard the door bell ring once again and soon the familiar voice was calling out to me.

"Annie?"

I turned around slowly, soaking in the face of Tony Stark. He slowly walked up to me, his eyes never leaving mine.

"Annie?" He said again, in a slow whisper.

I wasn't sure of what to say, or even do. I was paralyzed and captivated at the same time.

"Tony." I finally mustered.

We stared at each other for a few moments that felt like an hour each.

"What are you doing here?" He asked.

"I think I'm back."

"Think?"

"I'm not sure yet if I'm staying.." I said.

"Why?"

"It might be too much." I answer honestly.

"Oh." He replied. Oh? That's it?

"Yeah.." Yeah? Is that all you can do?

"So how have you been?" Tony asked.

"I've been alright, you?"

"I've been okay." He said, but I could tell by his eyes that he hadn't. I did this to him. I made him a wreck.

"I missed you, Tony." I muttered. He looked at me, shocked and unsure of what to say.

"Well I should probably get back inside.." He said finally, and I felt my stomach flop.

"Yeah, I need to be getting home anyways."

"It was nice seeing you again, Annie." He said with a hint of a smile on his face.

"Yeah, you too." I smile slightly.

We stare at each other for a moment more and head off into our separate directions. I wish I could have been able to look at him longer. It would make up for lost time. I didn't realize how much I missed his brown eyes, his messy hair, and his scruffy chin. He didn't smile though, well not a real smile at least. I wished I could have seen it. His smile was enticing and he was my own personal drug.

I couldn't bring myself to focus on unpacking so I just sat down on the couch staring blankly ahead outside my window over the busy Manhattan streets. Was Tony still at the bar with that woman? Who is she to him? Are they close? Does he love her? The questions were endless, and the uneasy, anxious feeling failed to cease. I wondered what was going through his head at the moment whether he was upset about my return, which I feared, or if he wanted to see me again. Maybe he'll want to love me again now that I'm ready to learn how. It wasn't fair of me to ask though. I had no clue what was going through his head, maybe he was angry with me, he was only acting the way he was due to the shock of seeing me again.

I couldn't think bear to wonder what was going through his head because it was all scary to me. I wanted him to find me and I wanted everything to be okay, but I know things don't work out that way and neither does Tony Stark.

I tried sleep that night, and it was the worst I'd slept since the night I walked out on him. I missed when I would sleep with him by my side while his arm was protectively placed around my waist. I felt so safe, so cared for, and so loved. I knew I was loved. It took me awhile to get back to being able to sleep alone. I became an insomniac. It was hard to sleep without the warmth of Tony next to me. I would wake up curled into his side while I felt his breath against my neck. We would lay next to each other, and it was so easy.

I woke up after getting only three hours of sleep and I realized it was all I would be getting. Getting out of bed I walked out onto my balcony and looked at the still busy streets. The city never sleeps around here, and while others found it an annoyance I liked it. It was as if you would never be without the company of another, whether it would be a conversation, or just someone sitting a few tables away at a deserted restaurant in the early hours of the morning.

I thought, once again, of Tony Stark. What do I want from him, and what should I expect? I had no clue, and all I wanted was to be wrapped up in his arms once more. I couldn't help but wonder if I could be if I didn't make the mistake of leaving him when I did. I wanted Tony back in my life, because I admit to myself for the first time, that yes, I'm in love with Tony.
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Hi guys, oh my god I am so sorry, it's been five months since I updated. I've been so wrapped up in school, sports, friends, etc. and I just forgot and whenever I think about it I'm way to exausted to write the next chapter! I'm going to try and continue this though, and be consistant! I'm hoping to publish a chapter every week or two (Along with my Captain America story, which you should all go check out!) I hope this chapter is okay, the next one will be better, I promise! Love you guys, and thanks for sticking with me!