If I Could Change Your Mind

“This is our last song, “ Alex clears his throat as he always does before he sings ‘Dear Maria Count Me In.’ “I got your picture, I’m coming with you, dear Maria count me...”
The Kansas City crowd was more reckless than the last time the band, All Time Low, had been there. It was the sixth show of the Rise and Fall of My Pants Tour and Alex was already pooped out, running on pure adrenaline and the high energy of the fans. It was exhausting, but this was his life, and he loved every second of it. He wrapped his right arm around Jack’s shoulders and smiled singing the last line, “There’s a story at the bottom of this bottle.” He then embraced Jack into a quick hug and yelled to the crowd, “We’re a little band called All Time Low! Goodnight Kansas City!” With that, they ran off the stage while the crowd chanted “Encore, encore!”
As soon as Alex was backstage, he high fived Jack and the rest of the band members, then embraced a pretty little blonde girl named Kelsey in a hug, kissing her softly. “You did amazing tonight, honey!” Kelsey exclaimed, smiling up at Alex. “So did you, love.” Alex looked down into Kelsey’s warm chocolate brown eyes, noticing her beautiful bright smile and the way the blue streaks in her hair shimmered in the dimly lit backstage. Alex and Kelsey had been dating for over two weeks now, and were still in the honeymoon phase, where they were practically connected at the hip. Alex knew Kelsey because she the lead singer of Purple Vomit, their opening act.
Jack, who was standing on the other side of the room with Alicia, the guitarist of Purple Vomit, and Rian. Zack, who was always shirtless and got super sweaty after a show, had already hit the showers. “Isn’t that right, Jack?” Alicia asked, noticing a frowning Jack. “Helloooo?” Rian said, waving his hand in front of Jack’s face. Jack not contributing to the conversation had become more and more frequent since Alex and Kelsey started dating and Alicia and Rian started to take notice.
“What?” Jack questioned, snapping out of it. “Are you okay?” Concern filled Alicia’s eyes. “Oh uh, yeah I’m fine...” Jack lies, his eyes flickering back to Alex and Kelsey, who were making out in the corner. A pang jealousy suddenly fills within him, but he tries not to show it. Alicia and Rian follow his gaze to Alex and Kelsey, Alicia commenting “Yeah, it grosses me out when they’re like this too.” “We should leave these two lovebirds alone.” Rian says loudly, saying it more to Alex and Kelsey than to Alicia and Jack. Alex gives them the finger while smiling into his kiss with Kelsey, while Alicia laughs and both her and Rian started walking away. Jack glares at Alex and his annoying little girlfriend for a moment longer before dragging his feet after them.
Later on the tour bus, Jack is playing mindless video games, trying not to think about his best friends constant makeout sessions with that stupid girl. Just then, Alex opens the door of the tour bus and waltzes in, a gigantic lopsided grin on his face. Jack could feel the happiness just radiating off him, which was like another stab in the heart. “Hey Jack! Come here buddy!” Alex bounds over to Jack and takes him into a hug. “I love you.” He says, holding onto him tightly. Jack hugs him back but when Alex said those words, his heart sank. “I love you too...more than you know...” He mumbles inaudibly. “What?” Alex questions, pulling back. “Nothing, nothing...” Alex cocks his head to the side, but doesn’t press for more. “Gosh, Jack, thank you so much introducing me to Kelsey, I’m totally crazy about her.”
Jack and Kelsey had quickly become friends when Jack introduced himself at one of Purple Vomit’s concerts. He introduced Alex to Kelsey soon after, and Kelsey had mentioned her band. Alex automatically her to open for them because he wanted to spend more time with her. Jack instantly saw their attraction after this and knew they were going to end up dating. Because of this, he didn’t act on his feelings for Alex, hiding them from everyone. But lately it was getting harder and harder to keep them contained and he needed some kind of out lit.
“Wow, that’s great Alex.” Jack says half heartedly. “Yeah, it really is...” Alex’s smile grew and Jack knew he was thinking of Kelsey. Alex sighs “Gosh, she’s just so perfect! She’s totally gets me, she knows exactly how to make me laugh. And she’s so amazingly talented, all her songs are so deep and full of meaning; she actually cares about what she’s singing, unlike a lot of bands we’ve toured with.” “Yeah, I get it Alex.” Jack says, pretending to be uninterested. “You know, it’s funny...I think, I think I actually love her. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.” “I get it Alex! Just stop!” Jack shouts unintentionally. He avoids Alex’s eyes and continues to play his video game. Alex looks at him for a moment before asking “Dude, what’s been up with you lately? You okay?” “Yeah. I’m fine, just leave me alone.” Jack snaps, not taking his eyes off the screen. “Fine then, I’m just gonna go to bed. Night Jack.” Alex gets up from the couch and stomps over to the fridge, grabs a beer, then heads off towards the bunks. Jack doesn’t watch him go, but once he’s gone he pauses the game and throws the controller, annoyed.
After a few minutes of pouting, Jack hears footsteps coming his way and he secretly hopes its Alex coming back to say he’s not mad. When Rian appears, he looks away, but Rian can tell how depressed Jack looks. “Jack, what is the matter with you?” Rian asks. Jack opens his mouth to reply, but Rian cuts him off. “Don’t tell me it’s nothing, I’m not stupid. Even Alicia started asking questions, and she’s kind of oblivious. What’s wrong?” Jack lets out a long breath and stares out the ground before he answers. “I just...I don’t like Kelsey and Alex together.” “What? Why? They’re great together! Don’t tell Alex,” Rian takes a pause before finishing his sentence, “ but I think that she’s the one for him.” “Eh, I don’t see it.” Jack grumbles. Rian gives him a funny look. “Really? Is it because Alex totally ruined your friendship with Kelsey? You three should hang out sometime, I think it would change your opinion about them...?”
“Oh yeah, maybe...” Jack yawns. “I think I’m going to go to bed now, it’s been a long day. Night Ri.” He gets up and starts toward the bunks as Rian calls concerned “Night Jack...”
Once in the safety of his bunk, Jack pulls out a small little box from under his pillow. He fingers around the box before he opens it, revealing a small razor blade. Jack sighs. He can’t get the words Alex and Rian said out of his mind, “I think, I think I actually love her. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.” They’re great together! Don’t tell Alex, but I think that she’s the one for him.” He’s thought about cutting many times before, but this time he felt like he needed to. All his emotions were bottling up, he wanted Alex to be happy... happy with him. Jack finally picks the blade up, dragging it across his wrist, instantly wincing at the pain he caused as little blood droplets appear. Jack let out a few tears before he repeated the process several more times. When he was finally satisfied he put the blade back in it’s hiding spot and decided he’d tried to sleep. He wanted to let his cuts bleed and he’d hide them tomorrow with his Blink-182 bracelet and no one would notice, he thought. Tomorrow was their day off, and that means he’d have to deal with a lot more Alex and Kelsey action, he’d need as much sleep as he could get.