Status: May contain 'descriptive' scenes..
Reckless
Chapter 4 - Jaws On The Floor
After that, I went straight up to bed. I didn't bother changing into my pyjamas, or taking off my makeup, or putting my hair up in a messy bun as I usually do every night. If I had of done this I would've started to think, and I didn't want to think, not right now. That wasn't going to stop me from thinking about it in the morning though.
Dan hadn't done anything wrong. He hadn't moved to fast and he hadn't forced me to do anything. He took me out for lunch, gave me a ride home. He even laughed at my jokes. I shared embarassing stories with him, ones some of my best friends don't even know. I didn't know why I opened up so easily to Dan. It's as if Dan was so much more then a stranger I had met in a gritty old music venue. It felt like I had knew him for a life time. And I had just threw that away, all because of my stupid social awkwardness. Looking back on the night before, I wish I had of kissed him. I don't know why I didn't.
I picked up my phone. I felt greasy and suspected I smelled bad. There was no texts from Dan. Suprise. Was he angry at me? Had I lead him on? Jesus Christ, Louise.. a kiss wouldn't have killed you. It's the least you could have done for the kid. He was so nice to you that whole day. Oh and he saved you from being trampled on a day before. He didn't have to do that for you, he could have just let you stay unconscious on the floor. And before I knew it, I was calling Dan.
My heart rate increased rapidly. I wasn't good with phone calls and instantly regretted calling him. But something kept me on the line listening to the ringing that never seemed to end. Ring, Ring. Ring, Ring. And after a few excruiting 'rings', I heard his raspy voice pick up from the other end. "Hello?" he said, sounding puzzled. "Um, hi Dan. I just wanted to talk about last night. I don't.." Dan interrupted me as I tried to think of an appropriate way to say sorry for pretty much rejecting him. "Louise, it's fine. Honestly. I shouldn't have asked, I'm stupid to think you even liked me, never mind that you'd kiss me." "But.." "No, Louise, I'm sorry for wasting your time. I'll probably just be another one you and your friends can laugh about." "Dan, could you come over to my house?" and then, there was a silence. A silence that told me I had no idea what I was doing. Dan was obviously irritated and I didn't know how to handle it. But I knew I couldn't let it end like that, so quickly. I knew Dan was something I wanted to hold on to. "I'll be there in five." Dan said bluntly on the other side of the phone.
The next five minutes were the worst of my life. I paced around, thinking what I had done. Why had I even invited Dan over? What was I even going to say to him? These are the times were anxiety does not help, at all. I sat back on the sofa and looked at my phone. It stood there blankly, nothing on the screen. Nothing from Dan asking why he had to come over. Just a blank screen that held all evidence that Dan was on his way over. Just as I tipped my head back and looked up at the ceiling, there was a knock at the door. I stood up slowly and adjusted my shirt. The shirt I had on from last night. I made my way to the door and breathed out heavily as I stopped infront of it. I opened the door, and sure enough, there was Dan.
Dan hadn't done anything wrong. He hadn't moved to fast and he hadn't forced me to do anything. He took me out for lunch, gave me a ride home. He even laughed at my jokes. I shared embarassing stories with him, ones some of my best friends don't even know. I didn't know why I opened up so easily to Dan. It's as if Dan was so much more then a stranger I had met in a gritty old music venue. It felt like I had knew him for a life time. And I had just threw that away, all because of my stupid social awkwardness. Looking back on the night before, I wish I had of kissed him. I don't know why I didn't.
I picked up my phone. I felt greasy and suspected I smelled bad. There was no texts from Dan. Suprise. Was he angry at me? Had I lead him on? Jesus Christ, Louise.. a kiss wouldn't have killed you. It's the least you could have done for the kid. He was so nice to you that whole day. Oh and he saved you from being trampled on a day before. He didn't have to do that for you, he could have just let you stay unconscious on the floor. And before I knew it, I was calling Dan.
My heart rate increased rapidly. I wasn't good with phone calls and instantly regretted calling him. But something kept me on the line listening to the ringing that never seemed to end. Ring, Ring. Ring, Ring. And after a few excruiting 'rings', I heard his raspy voice pick up from the other end. "Hello?" he said, sounding puzzled. "Um, hi Dan. I just wanted to talk about last night. I don't.." Dan interrupted me as I tried to think of an appropriate way to say sorry for pretty much rejecting him. "Louise, it's fine. Honestly. I shouldn't have asked, I'm stupid to think you even liked me, never mind that you'd kiss me." "But.." "No, Louise, I'm sorry for wasting your time. I'll probably just be another one you and your friends can laugh about." "Dan, could you come over to my house?" and then, there was a silence. A silence that told me I had no idea what I was doing. Dan was obviously irritated and I didn't know how to handle it. But I knew I couldn't let it end like that, so quickly. I knew Dan was something I wanted to hold on to. "I'll be there in five." Dan said bluntly on the other side of the phone.
The next five minutes were the worst of my life. I paced around, thinking what I had done. Why had I even invited Dan over? What was I even going to say to him? These are the times were anxiety does not help, at all. I sat back on the sofa and looked at my phone. It stood there blankly, nothing on the screen. Nothing from Dan asking why he had to come over. Just a blank screen that held all evidence that Dan was on his way over. Just as I tipped my head back and looked up at the ceiling, there was a knock at the door. I stood up slowly and adjusted my shirt. The shirt I had on from last night. I made my way to the door and breathed out heavily as I stopped infront of it. I opened the door, and sure enough, there was Dan.