Could You Love Me Just A Little Bit More

I'd been sat outside for about an hour, the cool air doing me a world of good. I'd drank three bottles of water and went for a walk around the bus a few times to clear my head and get my balance back.

Ella had been out a few times, making sure I was OK, being the overly protective mother type she was and told me to go to bed and wake up refreshed, but I wasn't yet ready to go to bed and I knew I'd feel ill if I lay down too soon.

Annabell was out to see me also, taking a walk around the bus to clear her head with me. She was, as she'd put it, off the planet drunk. She didn't know how to string a sentence together, she couldn't walk in a straight line and Jack eventually had to carry her back onto the bus.

Jesse had been out to congratulate me on winning and gave me a hug, an actual genuine hug. Jesse and I rarely had moments where we were sensible, it didn't come naturally to us to be sensible but when he was drunk, our insults and play fighting seemed to be non-existent. It was nice actually, to just hang around with him and not have to be thinking of clever things to say.

I was currently perched on the curb alone at this point, I could hear everyone inside laughing and joking and talking about the tour, but it was nice having some down time, away from the loud chatter and pressure to make conversation.

'Hey, Darcy. You feeling better now?' I heard Kellin ask. I turned my head to see him coming towards me, a bottle of water in his hand.

'Yeah, I'm good. Sitting out here is doing wonders for me.' I told him. I patted the side of the curb next to me, asking him to take a set. He did so happily, knocking into my arm a little as he sat.

'So, do you drink like that often? Your stomach seemed to handle it pretty well.' Kellin piped up then took a sip of his water.

'Not really, I just couldn't let Jesse win. Us Geordie's are meant to be able to handle our drink, or so we're told, so I guess I'm just a natural.' I smiled, but Kellin looked slightly confused.

'What's a Geordie?' He asked and I mentally kicked myself again for not really explaining much to him.

'It's what people from Newcastle get called back home. Apparently we're all meant to be real big drinkers and are able to handle what ever is thrown our way, I'm not like that at all, I'm a lame Geordie.' I laughed a little to myself as I told him.

'You aren't lame, you just don't conform to your name. People think because I'm in a band I must drink all of the time and get absolutely hammered, that is not true. I rarely drink, I don't conform either. We'll just be lame together if that's the case.' He grinned at me.

I smiled at him and it was quiet for a moment, just sitting with Kellin was making me feel happy and safe and comfortable, I couldn't image leaving in a few month and not having him or any of the guys there any more. Sitting thinking brought out my emotional side, a side I liked to keep hidden but never really succeeding.

'You know, I really appreciate how much you've looked out for me since I've been here.' I started, sentimental side coming out too. 'You've all made me feel like part of your little family. I had big fears about being left to the side to fend for myself, but its been the total opposite, so I'd just like to thank you for that.' I told Kellin, hoping he'd believe me and wouldn't accuse the alcohol of making me talk stupid.

'I would never do that, even if you turned out to be a snobby bitch, I still wouldn't leave you out. You're here to do a job and I'd do my best to try and help you, as much as I wouldn't really want to. I'd also let Jesse be really mean to you if I didn't like you, but I do, so he can only be playful.' I smiled at what Kellin was saying, then it sank in what he'd just said. He liked me? Did he mean he liked me? Or was he admitting that he liked me liked me?

I was confused and my head started spinning a little, I didn't know whether to blame the alcohol I'd consumed or the conversation we'd just had. We sat for a moment in silence, I stared at Kellin, not knowing what to say then after a few minutes longer he started to lean into me, his face inched closer to mine, I could smell the alcohol on his breath that we'd both consumed. I knew if I wasn't such a committed girlfriend, I would have kissed him...but I just couldn't.

'I think I need to go lay down. I suddenly feel really ill.' I said to Kellin, pulling away from him and holding onto my head. I pushed myself up from the ground, Kellin following.

'I'm not letting you stay on the bus alone so I'll stay with you until you fall asleep.' He stated, holding onto my arm, noticing my balance was off again. I wanted to object to what he was saying but I couldn't, I couldn't tell him to leave me alone and go and join the rest of the guys because I wanted him there.

He walked me onto the bus and sat me down on my bunk. He pulled back the cover that I'd neatly tucked into the sides and pushed my shoulders down so I was on my back. I didn't know why he felt so much need to help me into bed, I only felt a little dizzy, I wasn't an invalid.

'I need to get changed, I cant go to sleep yet.' I whined, pushing myself back up off the bed. The sickness was really taking over now, the fresh air and walks around the bus had seemed to help nothing.

'Darcy, just sleep in your clothes for tonight. Much more movement and you're going to throw up. Just lay down.' Kellin said, pushing my shoulders back down.

'I think I'm going to be sick.' Was all I could say before pushing Kellin off the side of my bunk and making my way for the tiny bathroom.