Melodies
Chapter 63: Sydney
The holidays are supposed to be about being warm, happy, and with people you love.
I spent the 4 days after Christmas with Kell, so I guess I was with someone I loved. And I was warm, mostly. But there really wasn't any reason to be happy.
Kell called me at 3 in the morning (ish) the day after Christmas. He couldn't get any words out at first, and I didn't know what to do. When I finally got him to speak, he couldn't do so coherently. I listened to him crying over the phone because I didn't know what else I could do to help him. He finally told me that Jamie had just been taken to the hospital.
Half an hour later, Kell was in the passenger seat of my car, his eyes red and watery, his entire frame trembling and unsteady, his hair a mess. He'd thrown a coat over what he'd been wearing in bed and had met me in front of his house. When I saw him, all rumpled and distraught, I immediately knew how the rest of my break would be spent. I only minded for his sake.
We drove around without really talking or anything, but it was okay. At some point, he did manage to tell me, between shaky inhales, what had happened, that something was wrong with Jamie's heart. He told me how unfair he thought it was that this had happened right after Christmas. I couldn't help but agree with him.
Up until December 31st, Jamie was kept in the hospital for observation and to secure any risks. I spent most of that time with Kell, trying to keep him either asleep, busy, or just distracted. Mostly, he slept. I was glad for that, really. He'd been so behind on sleep for so long, it was nice to see him catch up. I just wish it had been under different circumstances.
December 31st, Jamie came home. I thought it was a little weird that he wasn't going to be going anywhere for treatment, until Kell explained that they would be doing a family oriented treatment, and that Jamie would still be going to therapy and group sessions to help his recovery.
Kell kept me with him all through the first night of Jamie being out of the hospital again. I didn't mind, seeing as I'd hoped to spend New Year's with him anyway. We weren't out at a party, or shouting out numbers as we counted down with the rest of the world. We weren't dancing or drinking or blowing noisemakers. We were hardly even smiling, watching the ball drop on Kell's laptop screen.
But we were together, Kell in my arms, wrapped up in a thick blanket. Jamie was downstairs with Willa, and Kell and I were upstairs, in a shell of privacy and a shallow warmth. Kell turned to look at me as the crowds on his laptop screamed in celebration of the new year. He smiled just a little, but it was more than I'd seen in days. And he kissed me, and I knew that I would be sacrificing a lot of time and patience for him throughout Jamie's treatment.
I also knew that I was completely okay with it.
I spent the 4 days after Christmas with Kell, so I guess I was with someone I loved. And I was warm, mostly. But there really wasn't any reason to be happy.
Kell called me at 3 in the morning (ish) the day after Christmas. He couldn't get any words out at first, and I didn't know what to do. When I finally got him to speak, he couldn't do so coherently. I listened to him crying over the phone because I didn't know what else I could do to help him. He finally told me that Jamie had just been taken to the hospital.
Half an hour later, Kell was in the passenger seat of my car, his eyes red and watery, his entire frame trembling and unsteady, his hair a mess. He'd thrown a coat over what he'd been wearing in bed and had met me in front of his house. When I saw him, all rumpled and distraught, I immediately knew how the rest of my break would be spent. I only minded for his sake.
We drove around without really talking or anything, but it was okay. At some point, he did manage to tell me, between shaky inhales, what had happened, that something was wrong with Jamie's heart. He told me how unfair he thought it was that this had happened right after Christmas. I couldn't help but agree with him.
Up until December 31st, Jamie was kept in the hospital for observation and to secure any risks. I spent most of that time with Kell, trying to keep him either asleep, busy, or just distracted. Mostly, he slept. I was glad for that, really. He'd been so behind on sleep for so long, it was nice to see him catch up. I just wish it had been under different circumstances.
December 31st, Jamie came home. I thought it was a little weird that he wasn't going to be going anywhere for treatment, until Kell explained that they would be doing a family oriented treatment, and that Jamie would still be going to therapy and group sessions to help his recovery.
Kell kept me with him all through the first night of Jamie being out of the hospital again. I didn't mind, seeing as I'd hoped to spend New Year's with him anyway. We weren't out at a party, or shouting out numbers as we counted down with the rest of the world. We weren't dancing or drinking or blowing noisemakers. We were hardly even smiling, watching the ball drop on Kell's laptop screen.
But we were together, Kell in my arms, wrapped up in a thick blanket. Jamie was downstairs with Willa, and Kell and I were upstairs, in a shell of privacy and a shallow warmth. Kell turned to look at me as the crowds on his laptop screamed in celebration of the new year. He smiled just a little, but it was more than I'd seen in days. And he kissed me, and I knew that I would be sacrificing a lot of time and patience for him throughout Jamie's treatment.
I also knew that I was completely okay with it.