The Singer Finished Singing and He's Walking Out
chapter 21
Gerard's pov
After driving me home Ray offered to come inside and keep me company for a while but I just wanted to be alone to gather my thoughts, walking inside the house suddenly felt so big and empty.
On the floor next to the couch was a book that Frank had started to read, on the walls pictures showing us and the other guys during happier times.
I slowly walked upstairs, as I passed the linen closet I stopped remembering the morning of the accident.
"If you're up there how could you do this to me? What kind of a god would take away such a beautiful person and leave such pain!" I cried out looking upwards.
I eventually reached the door to Frank's bedroom, I hesitated slightly before pushing it open. It was just as Frank had left it, a cup that had once held coffee sat on the bedside table, clothes littered the floor, CD's were piled up around the stereo.
I picked up one of his shirts and lay down on his bed, bringing the shirt closer to my face I breathed in his scent, the scent that had drived me crazy more times than I could remember.
After an hour of just laying there I sat up and wiped the tears that had been forming out of my eyes, standing up I placed the shirt down on the bed and walked out of the room.
Walking back downstairs I made my way in to the kitchen and walked over to one of the cupboards, opening the door I moved a few things out of the way and reached to a bottle of vodka that sat at the back.
Frank and Mikey had thought that I didn't know that it was there, but I found it one day while I was looking for crackers.
Standing up I held the bottle up and looked at the clear liquid, it was as if it was calling to me.
With it in my hand I walked back upstairs to the bathroom next to Mikey's room, I went straight for the medicine cabinet and grabbed hold of the packets of pills that lay in there, I didn't look at the labels, I didn't care what they were for, I knew that they would do what I needed them to.
I carried everything in to my room and placed it beside my bed before going back to Frank's room, I took my shirt off and replaced it with his one that I'd been holding before, turning around I saw a picture of us stuck on his wall, I peeled it off and made my way back to my room.
I placed the photo on one of the pillows on my bed before sitting down at my desk, I took a page of paper out of one of my various notebooks and picked up a pen, slowly with tears in my eyes I began to write.
I'm sorry for all the pain that I know this will cause, but I'm too weak.
I know that I did it for so many years before, but now I can't live without Frank.
Please try not to be sad, remember the happy times, like how in love with each other we were.
And celebrate the fact that by the time you read this we'll be together again.
I love you all so much, I always will.
Love Gerard xx
I placed the pen down next to the paper and walked over to the bed, sitting down on the edge I picked up the bottle of vodka and unscrewed the cap, placing it back on the floor as I emptied the pill packets on to the bed.
One by one I swallowed each pill, followed by a swig of the vodka, gradually becoming drowsier and drowsier.
Once everything was gone I lay back on the bed and closed my eyes.
In the distance I could have sworn that I heard his voice calling me before everything around me turned to black.
-The End
After driving me home Ray offered to come inside and keep me company for a while but I just wanted to be alone to gather my thoughts, walking inside the house suddenly felt so big and empty.
On the floor next to the couch was a book that Frank had started to read, on the walls pictures showing us and the other guys during happier times.
I slowly walked upstairs, as I passed the linen closet I stopped remembering the morning of the accident.
"If you're up there how could you do this to me? What kind of a god would take away such a beautiful person and leave such pain!" I cried out looking upwards.
I eventually reached the door to Frank's bedroom, I hesitated slightly before pushing it open. It was just as Frank had left it, a cup that had once held coffee sat on the bedside table, clothes littered the floor, CD's were piled up around the stereo.
I picked up one of his shirts and lay down on his bed, bringing the shirt closer to my face I breathed in his scent, the scent that had drived me crazy more times than I could remember.
After an hour of just laying there I sat up and wiped the tears that had been forming out of my eyes, standing up I placed the shirt down on the bed and walked out of the room.
Walking back downstairs I made my way in to the kitchen and walked over to one of the cupboards, opening the door I moved a few things out of the way and reached to a bottle of vodka that sat at the back.
Frank and Mikey had thought that I didn't know that it was there, but I found it one day while I was looking for crackers.
Standing up I held the bottle up and looked at the clear liquid, it was as if it was calling to me.
With it in my hand I walked back upstairs to the bathroom next to Mikey's room, I went straight for the medicine cabinet and grabbed hold of the packets of pills that lay in there, I didn't look at the labels, I didn't care what they were for, I knew that they would do what I needed them to.
I carried everything in to my room and placed it beside my bed before going back to Frank's room, I took my shirt off and replaced it with his one that I'd been holding before, turning around I saw a picture of us stuck on his wall, I peeled it off and made my way back to my room.
I placed the photo on one of the pillows on my bed before sitting down at my desk, I took a page of paper out of one of my various notebooks and picked up a pen, slowly with tears in my eyes I began to write.
I'm sorry for all the pain that I know this will cause, but I'm too weak.
I know that I did it for so many years before, but now I can't live without Frank.
Please try not to be sad, remember the happy times, like how in love with each other we were.
And celebrate the fact that by the time you read this we'll be together again.
I love you all so much, I always will.
Love Gerard xx
I placed the pen down next to the paper and walked over to the bed, sitting down on the edge I picked up the bottle of vodka and unscrewed the cap, placing it back on the floor as I emptied the pill packets on to the bed.
One by one I swallowed each pill, followed by a swig of the vodka, gradually becoming drowsier and drowsier.
Once everything was gone I lay back on the bed and closed my eyes.
In the distance I could have sworn that I heard his voice calling me before everything around me turned to black.
-The End