Hold On Till May

Aurora leaned up against the van with a cigarette hanging out of her mouth. All she had done for the past fifteen minutes was smoke three cigarettes and stare at the hospital building with a furious look in her eyes. The guys gathered around her, unsure of what to do and how to react to the situation. None of them knew what was wrong with Mallory, but right now it didn't matter. At least she was safe in the hospital in the presence of Aurora's other families.

"Are we just going to sit here all night, or are we going to actually go in?" Rian's voice was patient, but he was getting tired of sitting on the concrete waiting for the girl to finally get into motion.

"I bet you all $40 that she overdosed and regretted it." There was absolutely no emotion in her voice, but she knew what her mother had done without even being told. She could just feel it in her bones that that's what happened. The guys looked at each other with sad, awkward looks. None of them knew what to say.

Alex scooted a few feet over towards Aurora and pulled her head into his chest. He knew all too well that she was ready to bust out into tears. And that's exactly what she did. If the guys didn't know how to react before, they defiantly didn't know now.

"She was going to leave me to be an orphan." Aurora cried into Alex's shirt. "Selfish bitch." Alex took the cigarette out of her shaking hand and stomped it out so he could get a tighter grip on the girl that he thought was about to collapse from all of the emotions running haywire throughout her tiny body. He rubbed her back and placed a kiss on her head thinking that it would calm her down, but it didn't. All of the boys were thinking the same exact thing: she didn't deserve anything bad that's happened in her life. "Why doesn't she love me anymore?" The girl was sobbing in a weeping fashion, making everyone cringe from her pain. No one wanted to see her like this. "I mean, she wonders why I do what I do to myself, but she can't understand that she's a huge part of that problem."

Aurora pulled out of the boys grip, wiping off her face with her sleeve.

"Wait," Rian spoke up, "what do you do to yourself?" Shock had taken over his entire being, thinking that he knew what she was talking about, but hoping that it wasn’t what he thought it was. Rian was the only one out of the boys who didn’t know that Aurora had taken up her nasty habit again, but maybe the stress was now making her forget. Either way, everyone had gone wide eyed.

Aurora tried to shrug it off in a nonchalant manner, praying that he would believe her. “Nothing, Ri.”

“All of you know something that I don’t,” Rian sighed. He was now getting frustrated; the patience that he held just a few minutes ago had now vanished into thin air.

“She’s…” Jack shook his head, not wanting to speak the words. “She’s… you know what-ing again.” He sneered through his words; he didn’t want to say what she was really doing because it hurt them too much. Rian looked too sad for Aurora to even handle. She was ready to drop to her knees and apologize for her childlike behavior and assure him that she was going to handle it and get help, but that would make the situation much worse than it was.

Rian looked like he was going to punch something or break down and cry. “Is this true?” In his head, he was having flashbacks to nights that he was pretty much sure that she was going to die right then and there, in front of all of her friends, because she couldn’t stop this addiction from eating her alive. The demons were too big for her to fight back then and they obviously came back, trying to take over her body and eat away at her mind like they used to.

Aurora bit her lip and nodded her head. She looked like a guilty little kid, she knew what she was doing was wrong, but there was no way to stop her anymore. Not even her friends, not even Alex could stop what was hidden underneath her clothes.

“Are you trying to kill yourself, too?” Rian scoffed and grabbed his head in disbelief. Today wasn’t summing up to be good whatsoever and all of them were hoping that this was going to be the last of the bad news because if there was anymore, they’d all explode in an instant.

She looked down at her feet and started to play with her hands. “No.”

“Can you look at me?” Rian asked with a stern tone. After a few seconds of hesitating, she looked him straight in the eye. “Please don’t leave us.” It was almost a beg that fell out of his mouth, a silent sob and a plea for her life.

“I don’t want to.” Rian walked over to the girl and placed her face in his hands, kissing the top of her head, making her feel safe and at home with her family of friends. Rian had always been the mature one of the bunch and even if he didn’t know what action to take, he always made the right move in their eyes. He finally hugged her and sighed. “Are you mad at me?”

Rian laughed softly. “I’m not mad, Princess. I’m just a little hurt and disappointed, but you know that we’re here to help you.” With those words, tears silently fell from the girls eyes.

+++

Another fifty minutes had passed before they finally walked into the hospital, searching for Mallory Manning and some other moms. Aurora stayed silent and just walked into her mom’s room, sitting by her bedside with an expressionless face. “Hey, mom.” Mallory woke up from her sleep and smiled at her daughter; she was far too thankful that she was there. But for once, Mallory realized that she needed her baby girl around and that things were going to change, with or without her husband. The girl needed a mother and she hadn’t realized until this very moment. “Why’d you do it? I mean I couldn't have lost you and dad. Being an orphan would suck. And as much as we fight and spew bad words at each other, it doesn't mean that I don't need you or don't love you."

Mallory's eyes were filled with tears of joy from hearing those words from her daughter. "I did it because I thought I needed to. Then when I thought of you, I called an ambulance and Isobel. They pumped my stomach and now here I am, on suicide watch, but I'm thankful that you're by my side."

Both of them had tears running down their faces in an uncontrollable fashion.

Alex listened from outside the door, smiling when their kind words were exchanged. Mallory asked how New York was and if the guys had gotten signed as if she truly cared about it. From what he could hear, Mallory leaned in close to her daughter. "I love you, baby girl.

"I love you too, mama. Don't ever leave me."

Alex walked away with a feeling of satisfactory, hoping that this was the beginning of change for his girl.