Disgrace

I didn’t look back as Derrick called my name. The tears I had been trying so hard to control, rushed out and I realized I was sobbing uncontrollably. I just wanted to get away from him. I didn’t want to hear him talk about my life. Knowing that someone knows those intricate details of my life was just terrifying. I didn’t want him to have power over me. Not some stranger who had stolen from me. I picked up my pace as I began to hear the footsteps behind me.

“Adalena! Please! I didn’t mean any of that!”

I just simply replied with, “Go hang yourself. I don’t wish to speak to you anymore.” But the footsteps didn’t stop. I began to run, just to get away. I didn’t want out anymore; I just wanted to be alone. Finally, I heard him recede. I stopped where I was and fell to my knees. The tears falling like a waterfall. I didn’t understand why thinking of my father affected me this much. Why did remembering my childhood make me hurt?

I sat down on the disgusting floor of the tunnel and I felt my bottom start to get wet. I pulled my knees into my chest and tried to get control of myself. When I heard Derrick approach cautiously, I didn't make a move to run nor did I say anything insulting, though many things came to mind. He sat down beside me and rubbed my back without saying a word.

When I finally got a handle on myself, Derrick stood up, instructed me to follow, and showed me out of the tunnel without saying another word.

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Derrick had handed me my bread and went back into his tunnel. Neither one of us said a thing, me for I couldn’t without crying and him for fear of making me cry more. I left the alley the way I had come and tried to ignore the stares I received as people looked at my swollen eyes and red face.

The market was more packed then it had been before I met Derrick. I barely looked at the faces as I passed so I hadn’t noticed they were all starring at something. Before I knew it, I was alone on a long pathway and to my left, coming my way, was the Queen herself.

“Who might you be young lady?” The Queen asked me, with a sharp edge to her voice.

Dumbfounded, I just stood there. The Queen’s gaze shifted to my right and I looked over my shoulder to see three soldiers coming my way. I said the first thing that came to my mind so I wouldn't be punished for my stupidity.

“My name’s Adalena, your highness. I come from here and I have stopped you to ask for a place to work in the palace so that I can serve my kingdom.” I quickly added a bow after my quickly said speech. The Queen looked me over once and I saw her eyes grow cold, but only for a second. She lifted her gaze to the soldiers who were now right behind me and I saw her nod. They left.

The Queen looked back at me as the crowd waited in anticipation to see what would happen to the ignorant lady who dared step in front of The Queen. A light smile played at her lips. “I shall see if we have a place for you. I am always in need of people to want to serve their kingdom as eagerly as you, Adalena. I just wish you hadn’t had to make a spectacle of yourself to show me this eagerness. But, please, stay within my guard for now as we make the trip back to the palace.” She then turned to address her people. “I am pleased to see that my people are wanting to help their kingdom. But, if anyone else wishes to work within the palace, this method shall be accepted no more. If you so wish to work please make a trip to the palace yourself and my many servants shall help see that you are welcomed.”

On that note, The Queen lightly pushed me towards her guard and she mounted her horse and rode ahead. I stumbled as I tried to keep pace. The guards were walking at a fast pace to keep up with The Queen on her horse. It was painfully fast and I wondered how well these people were trained to have to do this everywhere The Queen went. I tripped over a rock in the road and ran into the guard in front of me.

“Watch it, peasant! It’s bad enough we have to deal with this unspeakable-“

He stopped as if something was in his way and then he started coughing. A pool of black blood started to form around him. The soldier crumpled to the ground and lay there unmoving before anyone besides me even noticed what was happening. I screamed and was pushed out of the way as fellow soldiers tried to resurrect their comrade. “It had to be a Schande. But why would they target a soldier of the Queen’s?” a man who looked to be in his middle-aged years said to himself. Then he turned to me. “You!” I froze in fear. I hadn’t killed the man for being rude, nor had I even thought him dead. Was this going to be my last day on this planet?

“Yes, sir?” I asked the fear obvious in my voice.

“Don’t you worry, madam. You have nothing to worry about. We know a Schande wouldn’t risk being found out in the way you approached The Queen. But did you happen to notice anybody suspicious? Someone who might have been eyeing The Queen or Anton?” The man looked sympathetic towards me and I shook my head, not able to find the words that so desperately wanted to escape. The kind soldier stood up and ordered that his men carry Anton to the palace for a proper burial.

He then pulled me towards him and quietly said, “Keep your nose out of business at the palace. Talk to no one and let no one speak to you. You’re safer that way.”

He quickly let go and walked away briskly, leaving me to wonder what had just happened.