Wretched and Divine

When Lena woke up the next morning, nothing felt right. She looked over at a slumbering Jake and felt guilt rising in her body. She knew that none of this would have ever happened if she hadn't been here. She had completely destroyed not only her own life, but Jake's life as well.

She stood carefully, making sure she didn't wake Jake up. That was the last thing she wanted to happen. From the kitchen, she grabbed a pen and a piece of paper, carelessly scribbling a semi-heart felt note to Jake to leave on the counter for him to find.

She only had a few belongings but it didn't matter. Andy would send them to her or she would get new clothes. All she knew was she had to go. Ohio was calling her back.

In the midst of her brief packing, she called a taxi cab to come pick her up at Jake's house. She wasn't about to wake him up and ask him for a ride there. She knew what would happen. He would convince her with his soothing, sweet words to stay with him because he could make everything better. But the truth was, he couldn't. No one could ever repair the damage Lena had inflicted on all of their lives.



Jake woke up to find Lena's side of the bed made, empty, and cold. He groggily got up and shuffled his way into the kitchen, thinking maybe she would be in there getting breakfast. But all he found was a note written in her handwriting.

Jake,

I'm sorry I had to do this to you but I'm leaving. I'm going back to Ohio so I can't fuck up your life any more. All I've done is ruin your life and I know if I stay, I'm just going to keep doing it. I'll always love you, but it's time I said goodbye. By the time you read this, I'll either be at the airport or already on the plane headed home. I'm sorry, but this was the only choice I had.

-Lena

Jake immediately came to his senses and woke up fast. He grabbed his phone from the counter and dialed Lena's number, in the hopes that she was still on the ground.

Lena felt her phone vibrating in her hand. She looked down at the screen and saw Jake's name and picture begging her to pick up.

"Hello?" She answered.

"Lena, thank god you picked up. You can't do this. What the fuck are you thinking? You can't just leave like this." Jake sounded panicky.

"Jake, it's the only way I can protect you and myself. I'm sorry, but I have to go." She went to hang up but heard Jake's pleading voice.

"Lena--"

"My flight is boarding, Jake. I have to go."

"Lena, no--"

But it was too late. As she hung up the phone, a small tear escaped, rolling down her cheek and splashing on her dark wash jeans. Ohio was where she was meant to be, and where she was meant to stay. She could settle down for a bit, and figure out what she was going to do. She had left everything behind in L.A: Her career, Andy, Jake, the boys, everything.

When she found her seat on the plane, she put her carry on bag on the floor by her feet. Her phone had six texts from Jake, a couple from CC, a few from Ashley and Jinxx, but none from Andy. They all wanted her to stay, but Andy didn't. And that was what made leaving easier. She had been torn between the wretched and the divine. Neither won in the end.