Status: Semi-Active

No Such Thing as Too Young

This Is Just Me Disguised As Me

I sat with my feet in the cold sand, watching the waves come up the shore, and make its way back, over and over again in the never ending cycle. Nothing really made sense to me besides the water moving. Tony and I hadn’t spoken since the fight two weeks ago, and I honestly wasn’t sure if we ever would. As dramatic as that sounds, I’ve never fucked up this bad before. The look on his face before he walked out the door replayed over and over again in my mind. I couldn’t stop the constant replay of it, or the ache in my chest when I focused on it. “I thought I’d find you here” a familiar, deep voice spoke behind me. I felt the presence next to me, heat radiating from their body.

“Mike” I acknowledged him, glancing over at him. His tan shorts, and tank top fit him nicely, a cigarette hung from his mouth. “What’s up babygirl?” he asked, nudging me with his shoulder. I simply shrugged, afraid that if I looked at him, the truth would come pouring from my lips like word vomit. I knew if I told Mike what had been going on, he would tell Ash, and then there would be the never ending lectures, her telling my mom, and that was something I knew my mother couldn’t handle now. Not while she was going through her divorce, swamped at work, and me being a bitch at home. But maybe that was better… Maybe everyone needed to finally know.

I sighed looking over at him, deciding against clueing him in. “Nothing really Mike. How’s everyone?” I asked him. He shook his head, rubbing his eyes with his thumb and middle finger, and flicked his cigarette over to the side. “You look like absolute shit, and you’re asking me how everyone is? Dammit Shay, talk to us.” He sighed, looking at my pleadingly. I rolled my eyes, and pulled my knees up to my chest. “You sound like Tony” I said quietly, running my fingers through my dark, messy hair. He sighed, and observed me quietly as if he had some huge secret, something to tell me. As if he was waiting for me to break, or disappear any second. “What Mike?” I snapped at him. “You’re ridiculous you know that? You think I don’t know what you and Vic were talking about all those weeks ago? You think I haven’t figured out what the fuck is going on? You honestly think I buy that things with you and Tony just didn’t work out? It’s all bullshit Shay! Why didn’t you come to me. I feel like I’m the reason you guys broke up, like I’m the reason no one has seen you in weeks. Talk to me.” I stared at him, a loss for words. He looked broken, confused, and lost. I couldn’t believe he didn’t say anything before. “How did you know…?” I asked him quietly, hoping the crash of the small waves would hide the tremble of my voice. “I notice shit Shay, but it didn’t seem right to bombard you with questions, or accuse you of anything. But the way Tony reacted that day, when he yelled at me for ruining your life more. More was the key word there. And then the look on Vic’s face when I walked in, and he kept looking at you as if you were so fragile and broken.” The tears rushed down my face, “I’m sorry Mikey…” the anger in his voice was clear, and I couldn’t stand anyone else being mad at me.

I could no longer contain the sobs, “hey, hey, hey” he cooed, wrapping his arms around me. “I am broken, I’m so fucking damaged. You’re mad at me. I drove Tony away, he hates me now. Mike, my best friend hates me..” I cried. The tears ran down my cheek fast and fierce.
I buried my face into Mike’s shoulder, while he rubbed my back, keeping me close to him.
“That’s not true. He doesn’t hate you, and neither do I. I promise” Mike spoke directly into my ear, trying to calmly reassure me. I shook my head, “I was terrible to him.” I choked out. Mike gently let go of me, pulling back to look me in the eyes. “You were both angry, people say and do things they don’t mean when they’re angry. I promise he doesn’t hate you.” Mike told me sternly. I nodded, trying to calm my breathing. I wiped my eyes, seeing black on my fingers when I pulled my hands away.

Great my make-up was running. “God, I’m such a mess.” I mumbled, running my fingers through my hair. “We all are. That’s why we go so well together” he winked at me playfully. “Everyone seriously misses you though. Come round to practice tomorrow Shay” He pleaded with me. I bit my lip, “I don’t know if I’m ready to face Tony yet..” I whispered, looking over at him. He shrugged, “You’ll have to see him sooner or later.” he reminded me. I rolled my eyes, “well, I pick later”

I knew if I went tomorrow I would end up talking to Tony, and I wasn’t exactly sure where that would lead, or even where I wanted it to lead anymore. “I say soon, which means be at my place by noon, or Jaime and I will come drag you there ourselves” He told me, flashing me a cheesy smile. I nodded my head. “Alright, I’ll be there” I told him, leaning over to rest my head on his shoulder. Now or never I guess.
♠ ♠ ♠
I AM SO SORRY!

I lost the motivation to continue, and I literally had no idea where to take the story. I was just lost. But then a few days ago I decided the direction I wanted to go, despite not really liking where I had taken things before.

I am also sorry that this chapter sucks, I started it probably like 6 months ago, and its been changed so many times.
Once again thank you all! Give me some feedback, and even some suggestions on what you would like to see happen, or things you are starting to suspect.

Love you all!