Secretly

Julie was happy. She had a great job, a great apartment in a beautiful, sprawling city, and she had wonderful friends and neighbors.

On top of all that, she had a boyfriend who had a regular profession. All the pieces were starting to fall into place. Her puzzle was really coming together, and it was looking like a pretty picture.

Well, except for a few little kinks in her relationship with Andrew. But what relationship didn't suffer a few bumps along the road now and then?

Like, the fact that he was a criminal defense attorney. As in, he defended criminals. And not just any criminals, either, but the really big ones. The kind that lived in penthouses and whose wives were on Mob Wives.

But that was okay, because he was just making a name for himself, and as soon as he could, he'd open up his own firm and help the good, innocent people.

"But you're already famous," Julie had pointed out. "You have that big billboard sign up and your face is plastered all over buses." Not to mention, the biggest criminals seemed to have his number on speed dial.

Andrew then explained very clearly that he was well know with the bad people, and needed to be well known with the good people. Which made sense.

If you thought about it.

Then there was that other little speed bump. And that came in the form of a very tall, very attractive and very sweet hockey player who, even though agreed to be her friend, was proving to be a very bad one.

Not because he had tried anything, but because he was such a distraction. And he wasn't even doing it on purpose. It was all Julie's fault, and she knew it, too.

When they were together (usually joined by Patrick) she couldn't keep her eyes off of him. The way his brown hair framed his face. And those warm, chocolaty eyes. And how his arms flexed because he'd reached for a beer.

Innocent things that drove Julie crazy.

She tried hard not to think about him, but that made her think about him even more. Even when she was with Andrew, it was like she couldn't even control her brain and tell it to stop being so obsessed with the Captain of the Blackhawks.

Especially when Andrew was off fighting a case, defending some Italian mobster, Julie couldn't help but remember all the smiling faces and cheering crowds that echoed throughout the stadium when Jon and his team stepped out onto the ice.

Sure, he was a hockey player. But he made regular people without a criminal record and their own hit list happy.

It made Julie wonder if he could maybe make her happy, too.

…..

“So, you and this Andrew guy are like, dating now?” Patrick asked not so subtlety. They were having lunch at their favorite café during Julie’s lunch break. It should have been awkward, since this is where they often came when they were dating, but it wasn’t. Their relationship now was ten times better than it was when they WERE dating.

Not that he didn’t make a pass at her now and then. After everything, he still wanted to get her into bed.

“I guess you could call it that,” she responded, taking a huge bite of her sandwich.

Patrick was silent for a second. “What else could you call it?” He prodded. Julie had a feeling this wasn’t for his benefit, but Jon’s. It was no secret Jon liked her, and she definitely had feelings for him.

Strong ones.

It would be so easy for them to slip from their friendship into something more. So easy, that Julie wouldn’t have to say a word. Another kiss like the one they shared a couple weeks ago and it was a done deal.

But she was afraid.

What if after everything, he just up and left her, moving on to somebody else. Or multiple somebodies. Patrick was so goofy and easy going that they were able to make the transition from couple to friends seamlessly, but with Jon, Julie didn’t think it’d be so easy if he decided that he was done with her.

Sure, it was hard at first with Patrick, but after a while, she realized that they were never a good couple. In fact, they sucked as a couple.

“I know we sucked as a couple,” Patrick went on nonchalantly. “But I actually know a guy who would be great for you.” Julie couldn’t help but roll her eyes at that one.

Jon WAS great. He was perfect. So perfect, in fact, that she was convinced it would work out for them.

But what if it didn’t? A little voice asked, bringing Julie back to reality. If he dumped her, she wouldn’t be able to hurdle over it like she did with Patrick. She liked him too much. And what if they couldn’t even be friends anymore?

Forget it, she scolded herself. It was too risky.