Let's Take Over the World
I'm alive...I won't stop breathing.
Just a short one right now. But, hey; three updates in 24 hours! What more could you want? ...besides Danny and Ben in your bed, of course :p
Chapter 8
We reached the hospital in no time and I followed them as they rushed Danny to the Emergency Room. They took him into a separate room and a doctor stopped me.
“I'm sorry.” he said. “You can't go in here now.” he went inside after them and I was left with my own thoughts.
I paced back and forth. There was a chair that I could have sat in, but I was too restless. Tears were still streaming down my face. They had shut the blinds so I couldn't even see inside. A nurse came over with a form for me to fill out on Danny's behalf, since we had no kind of medical insurance. It took me nearly ten minutes my hands were shaking so badly.
I broke down as James came round the corner. I collapsed onto him and he held onto me as I fell to the ground.
“It's my fault!” I cried into his chest. James shushed me and stroked my hair.
“It's not your fault.” he whispered.
“It is. I let him go. I told him to go do it and now he's in there—”
“It's not your fault.” James cut me off. “Danny was the one who took a ridiculous amount of cocaine. Danny was the one who didn't stop. Not you.”
“But...maybe—maybe if I never said a-anything...he w-wouldn't have started. If I never--” I cut myself off when I realised I was telling James things I'd never opened up to anyone about—not Sam, not even Emma.
“What do you mean?” he pulled away to look at my face.
“N-nothing.” I wiped my face and avoided his eyes.
“Okay, you don't have to answer that, but tell me this: how long have you been in love with him?” I stared at him, open-mouthed. I shouldn't really be surprised, what with the way I was acting right now.
“How—how did you know?”
“I can tell. It's quite obvious; the way you look at him and those groupies.” he chuckled slightly. I blushed slightly, dipping my head, knowing I'd been caught. “Now, how long?” he craned his neck to meet my eyes.
“Since we stayed together in York.” I whispered.
“And you've kept it to yourself all this time?”
“No. I told Emma and Sam.”
“Sam?” he frowned. “Boy Sam?”
I shook my head. “Girl Sam.” the confusion cleared from his face before returning twice as bad.
“Girl Sam? You mean...she's like your beard?”
I opened my mouth, about to protest, but gave up, knowing he was right. “Yeah, pretty much.” I consented. “More like, to pass the time; moral support, you know?” he nodded as though he understood, but I knew he really didn't. “Hey,” I said, changing the subject, “Where are Sam and Cam?”
“Oh, uh, they're trying to sort shit out with the tour manager and the venues and shit.”
“Oh.” we sat there, facing each other on the floor for about twenty minutes in companionable silence until the doctor came out and told us we could go in now.
“He's unconscious still and will need to stay here for a couple of nights, but you should be able to talk to him by the morning. He'll be back to normal in no time.” he smiled before leaving. There was still nurses hanging around, adjusting cables and wires. Seeing him there like that—so young, so fragile—brought tears back to my eyes.
I sat by him and held his hand. I brought it to my lips. “I did this to you.” I whispered, kissing his knuckles, the tattoos there. Tears started to fall; I was crying so much tonight. “I'll never leave you again. I promise.”
I didn't move for the rest of the night and fell asleep by his side. James left after an hour or so without saying a word; he left me there, watching Danny.
“Ben.” I woke up to the sound of my name. I felt someone squeeze my hand and looked up sleepily to see who it was. “Hey, buddy.” he squeezed my hand again. “It's time to wake up.” he freed his hand to stroke my face. I leaned my cheek into his palm. “I thought I'd never see you again,” he whispered, his voice breaking.
I saw tears well in his eyes and stood up and leaned over him. I kissed him softly on the lips and he kissed me back. This was different to the other kisses we'd shared; it was sugar sweet and completely perfect. It wasn't needy; it wasn't urgent; we weren't dared to kiss; it was just a short moment of perfection. He laid his hand against my neck and I stroked his beard gently.
“You scared me last night.” I perched against the edge of his bed, but didn't move my face away from his.
“I scared myself.” I opened my eyes to see his face was as wet as mine felt.
“Don't ever leave me.” I whispered.
“Never.” I stared deeply into his eyes. It was the absolute truth, I could tell. I pressed my lips to his once more before the others arrived.
They seemed happy; I assumed James had told them everything. I sat back beside Danny, linking my fingers with his. We both smiled down at out interlaced hands; they fit together perfectly. They walked to the other side of the bed.
“How you doing, Dan?” Sam asked.
“I'm doing good. It was really fucking scary, though.”
“You're telling us!” James yelled, jokingly. “You should have seen him!” he pointed at me. I gave him the finger and smirked.
“I was just worried is all.” I brought Danny's hand to my lips and kissed it again.
“So, are you guys...” Cam raised his eyebrows at us and the others followed suit. “you know...?”
I looked at Danny awkwardly; I didn't really know what to say. He shrugged and smiled. “Uh...I don't really know what we are.” I mumbled. “I kind of figured that we could have this conversation alone.” I shot a pointed look at the guys, who simply took a seat. I rolled my eyes. I'll do it later, I thought, when they're gone.
We sat and talked for a little while. The guys had packed an overnight bag with our toothbrushes, some sweats to sleep in and clean clothes for both of us. When we'd asked what was happening with the tour, they'd reassured us that it was all sorted.
“The tour's still on,” Cam explained. “the dates are all just postponed for three days, so once you get out of here, there's still another two days to recover...properly.” he shrugged.
“Yay,” Danny said, heavy on the sarcasm. “Another two days in bed.”
“You don't have to stay in bed when we get back to the RV; it's just for today and tomorrow.” I assured him. “Although, the doc will probably try and get you to stay in bed for like a week or something.”
“And,” Sam added, “Kyle says that they're gonna cover the hospital costs, since it happened while you were on tour.” his phone buzzed and he pulled it out. “Fuck,” he said, noticing the time, “we'd best get back before we get locked out of the car park!” it was Sunday, so the WalMart car park gates were locked at ten pm.
They gathered their things and left without another word.
“So...” I said, looking at him, trying to find words. “What are we?” I figured that was a good starting point.
“I don't know. But I love you; I've always loved you, and I probably always will. I don't ever want to lose you. I guess it just took me nearly dying to get me to finally admit it.” he smiled shyly. I stood and kissed him.
“I love you too.” I grinned so wide it hurt my cheeks. He looked at me and his own smile grew.
“You shouldn't. You deserve better than me.”
“Well, tough shit. You're stuck with me now.” He smiled and scooted over so that I could sit next to him. We sat in comfortable silence, our hands laced together. He rested his head against my shoulder. We fell asleep like that.
I was woken up the next morning to the sound of a door slamming shut. I jerked awake. “Fuck!” I looked around to see Danny shaking his head, looking like he'd been woken up, too. I saw the doctor standing by the doorway with a sheepish look on his face.
“Sorry. I thought you'd be awake by now.” he gestured to the clock on the wall. Four pm. Fuck. “I suppose when you get the first good night sleep in over eighteen months, it really is a good one.” I laughed. Danny squeezed my hand.
“Well, Daniel, you can go home today.” the doctor smiled at us. We both breathed a sigh of relief; finally! “But you have to take it easy for the next few weeks. Your system has been wiped clean of all toxins; if you relapse it could be deadly.”
“What about the tour? He's still alright for that, right?”
“He should be. As long as you're not getting too wasted every night and don't take anything, you should be completely fine.” he smiled and handed over the discharge forms. I filled them out as Danny got changed into some clothes and I changed out of the sweats into jeans and a t-shirt. We got a cab back to WalMart and as we went inside the bus, Danny stopped in the doorway, arms wide.
“Honey, I'm home! Feel free to welcome me back with sexual favours!” he yelled. The others came through and hugged him. I grinned to myself. Danny saw it. “What?”
“The old you is back. I missed him.” I said. Then I kissed him.
Chapter 8
We reached the hospital in no time and I followed them as they rushed Danny to the Emergency Room. They took him into a separate room and a doctor stopped me.
“I'm sorry.” he said. “You can't go in here now.” he went inside after them and I was left with my own thoughts.
I paced back and forth. There was a chair that I could have sat in, but I was too restless. Tears were still streaming down my face. They had shut the blinds so I couldn't even see inside. A nurse came over with a form for me to fill out on Danny's behalf, since we had no kind of medical insurance. It took me nearly ten minutes my hands were shaking so badly.
I broke down as James came round the corner. I collapsed onto him and he held onto me as I fell to the ground.
“It's my fault!” I cried into his chest. James shushed me and stroked my hair.
“It's not your fault.” he whispered.
“It is. I let him go. I told him to go do it and now he's in there—”
“It's not your fault.” James cut me off. “Danny was the one who took a ridiculous amount of cocaine. Danny was the one who didn't stop. Not you.”
“But...maybe—maybe if I never said a-anything...he w-wouldn't have started. If I never--” I cut myself off when I realised I was telling James things I'd never opened up to anyone about—not Sam, not even Emma.
“What do you mean?” he pulled away to look at my face.
“N-nothing.” I wiped my face and avoided his eyes.
“Okay, you don't have to answer that, but tell me this: how long have you been in love with him?” I stared at him, open-mouthed. I shouldn't really be surprised, what with the way I was acting right now.
“How—how did you know?”
“I can tell. It's quite obvious; the way you look at him and those groupies.” he chuckled slightly. I blushed slightly, dipping my head, knowing I'd been caught. “Now, how long?” he craned his neck to meet my eyes.
“Since we stayed together in York.” I whispered.
“And you've kept it to yourself all this time?”
“No. I told Emma and Sam.”
“Sam?” he frowned. “Boy Sam?”
I shook my head. “Girl Sam.” the confusion cleared from his face before returning twice as bad.
“Girl Sam? You mean...she's like your beard?”
I opened my mouth, about to protest, but gave up, knowing he was right. “Yeah, pretty much.” I consented. “More like, to pass the time; moral support, you know?” he nodded as though he understood, but I knew he really didn't. “Hey,” I said, changing the subject, “Where are Sam and Cam?”
“Oh, uh, they're trying to sort shit out with the tour manager and the venues and shit.”
“Oh.” we sat there, facing each other on the floor for about twenty minutes in companionable silence until the doctor came out and told us we could go in now.
“He's unconscious still and will need to stay here for a couple of nights, but you should be able to talk to him by the morning. He'll be back to normal in no time.” he smiled before leaving. There was still nurses hanging around, adjusting cables and wires. Seeing him there like that—so young, so fragile—brought tears back to my eyes.
I sat by him and held his hand. I brought it to my lips. “I did this to you.” I whispered, kissing his knuckles, the tattoos there. Tears started to fall; I was crying so much tonight. “I'll never leave you again. I promise.”
I didn't move for the rest of the night and fell asleep by his side. James left after an hour or so without saying a word; he left me there, watching Danny.
“Ben.” I woke up to the sound of my name. I felt someone squeeze my hand and looked up sleepily to see who it was. “Hey, buddy.” he squeezed my hand again. “It's time to wake up.” he freed his hand to stroke my face. I leaned my cheek into his palm. “I thought I'd never see you again,” he whispered, his voice breaking.
I saw tears well in his eyes and stood up and leaned over him. I kissed him softly on the lips and he kissed me back. This was different to the other kisses we'd shared; it was sugar sweet and completely perfect. It wasn't needy; it wasn't urgent; we weren't dared to kiss; it was just a short moment of perfection. He laid his hand against my neck and I stroked his beard gently.
“You scared me last night.” I perched against the edge of his bed, but didn't move my face away from his.
“I scared myself.” I opened my eyes to see his face was as wet as mine felt.
“Don't ever leave me.” I whispered.
“Never.” I stared deeply into his eyes. It was the absolute truth, I could tell. I pressed my lips to his once more before the others arrived.
They seemed happy; I assumed James had told them everything. I sat back beside Danny, linking my fingers with his. We both smiled down at out interlaced hands; they fit together perfectly. They walked to the other side of the bed.
“How you doing, Dan?” Sam asked.
“I'm doing good. It was really fucking scary, though.”
“You're telling us!” James yelled, jokingly. “You should have seen him!” he pointed at me. I gave him the finger and smirked.
“I was just worried is all.” I brought Danny's hand to my lips and kissed it again.
“So, are you guys...” Cam raised his eyebrows at us and the others followed suit. “you know...?”
I looked at Danny awkwardly; I didn't really know what to say. He shrugged and smiled. “Uh...I don't really know what we are.” I mumbled. “I kind of figured that we could have this conversation alone.” I shot a pointed look at the guys, who simply took a seat. I rolled my eyes. I'll do it later, I thought, when they're gone.
We sat and talked for a little while. The guys had packed an overnight bag with our toothbrushes, some sweats to sleep in and clean clothes for both of us. When we'd asked what was happening with the tour, they'd reassured us that it was all sorted.
“The tour's still on,” Cam explained. “the dates are all just postponed for three days, so once you get out of here, there's still another two days to recover...properly.” he shrugged.
“Yay,” Danny said, heavy on the sarcasm. “Another two days in bed.”
“You don't have to stay in bed when we get back to the RV; it's just for today and tomorrow.” I assured him. “Although, the doc will probably try and get you to stay in bed for like a week or something.”
“And,” Sam added, “Kyle says that they're gonna cover the hospital costs, since it happened while you were on tour.” his phone buzzed and he pulled it out. “Fuck,” he said, noticing the time, “we'd best get back before we get locked out of the car park!” it was Sunday, so the WalMart car park gates were locked at ten pm.
They gathered their things and left without another word.
“So...” I said, looking at him, trying to find words. “What are we?” I figured that was a good starting point.
“I don't know. But I love you; I've always loved you, and I probably always will. I don't ever want to lose you. I guess it just took me nearly dying to get me to finally admit it.” he smiled shyly. I stood and kissed him.
“I love you too.” I grinned so wide it hurt my cheeks. He looked at me and his own smile grew.
“You shouldn't. You deserve better than me.”
“Well, tough shit. You're stuck with me now.” He smiled and scooted over so that I could sit next to him. We sat in comfortable silence, our hands laced together. He rested his head against my shoulder. We fell asleep like that.
I was woken up the next morning to the sound of a door slamming shut. I jerked awake. “Fuck!” I looked around to see Danny shaking his head, looking like he'd been woken up, too. I saw the doctor standing by the doorway with a sheepish look on his face.
“Sorry. I thought you'd be awake by now.” he gestured to the clock on the wall. Four pm. Fuck. “I suppose when you get the first good night sleep in over eighteen months, it really is a good one.” I laughed. Danny squeezed my hand.
“Well, Daniel, you can go home today.” the doctor smiled at us. We both breathed a sigh of relief; finally! “But you have to take it easy for the next few weeks. Your system has been wiped clean of all toxins; if you relapse it could be deadly.”
“What about the tour? He's still alright for that, right?”
“He should be. As long as you're not getting too wasted every night and don't take anything, you should be completely fine.” he smiled and handed over the discharge forms. I filled them out as Danny got changed into some clothes and I changed out of the sweats into jeans and a t-shirt. We got a cab back to WalMart and as we went inside the bus, Danny stopped in the doorway, arms wide.
“Honey, I'm home! Feel free to welcome me back with sexual favours!” he yelled. The others came through and hugged him. I grinned to myself. Danny saw it. “What?”
“The old you is back. I missed him.” I said. Then I kissed him.