BLUE

CHAPTER ONE

Leaving the old oak door swinging in the wind I stepped into the night. I left it open for my father to find, so he would know when he woke that I had escaped him. I would never return to him, ever. My old tennis shoes squeaked on the damp grass as I walked, body aching. Usually the aches would have crippled my movements. But now? This was my time. I stood tall - well, as tall as was possible with my small stature, and moved onward. A few minutes ago, after rifling through my dad’s things I found a little over twenty dollars. That's all I could get but I hopped into the cab in hopes it would take me far enough.
My ribs still hurt from the last beating only days before making me gingerly hold the seatbelt from my body. I rubbed my side when the driver suddenly spoke up.
"Where you headed kid?" the man asked.
"As far away as I can get for 20 bucks" I whispered. He took one look at my face in the rear view mirror and went pale. I knew I what I looked like...
Bruised, starved, and sleep deprived. But it didn't matter. I just had to get away. That much was clear...
"Are you ok?" He asked.
"Yeah, just get me away from here..." I said angrily. He frowned.
"Do you have a place to stay?"
"Sure" I said after a pause.
I couldn't get my friends or family mixed up in this... Dad would kill them. But I didn’t want this guy getting into my business. I was trying to enjoy this freedom, I wasn’t interested in chatting.
"No you don’t" he sighed.
I looked up at the driver. His eyes held a faint wisp of pity in the hues of green that lay flecked with blue. Deep brown almost black hair splayed over his head in wavy tufts. His lips looked soft and held the slightest quirk of a sweet smile. I shifted uncomfortably under his gaze. I turned away quickly.
Damn it I'm supposed to be on the run! I can’t swoon at a time like this! Jesus!
"They hurt you bad didn’t they?" the driver asked.
"Dude, just drive! That is what you do right? Or did I hop into the wrong car? Let me guess, big flashing lights are going to pop on and you’re going to start in on me about the capital of Russia or something? Get going Adam Growe" I snapped. He looked at me with critical eyes then finally broke the uncomfortable silence.
"Well at least you kept something of a personality… couldn't get to that could they, eh?" he asked with a dimpled grin. I blushed and his grin widened.
"Shut up…" I muttered, picking at my shirt. The car started forward and I settled in. my back relaxing slightly, eyes fluttering shut, stomach whining, and my mind finally calming.
"They tried to beat it out of you didn't they? Your mom and dad I mean" he asked suddenly, his face serious. I sat upright slightly and rubbed my eyes, trying to stay awake.
"I don't know what you’re talking about buddy... Just drive" I said, turning away.
"Need a place to stay?"
"No..."
"Yes you do"
“Leave me alone man, I don’t know who you are or what you want, but bugger off!” I snapped. He rolled his eyes but didn’t seem annoyed, more amused than anything else.
"Want to get something to eat?"
"What the hell is your problem!? Just leave me alone and DRIVE! Get the point, I’m NOT interested"
"Sorry..." He started driving again and I curled up on my good side.
"It wasn't my mom..." I whispered he cocked his head to the side in confusion, glancing up at the mirror to look at me.
I rubbed my eyes.
"How did you know anyway?" I asked.
"Huh? Oh, well you’re not the only one who went through it kid..." He said sadly.
"You?" I asked.
"Naw, sorry man, I don't play for that team" He chuckled.
"Then how-"
"My sister..." He said bluntly and looked back to me. I sunk deeper into my seat.
“Oh…”
"Yeah, but unlike you she didn't get away..."
"She's still with them?" I asked.
"They starved, beat, and mutilated her... She died 2 years ago..." The engine revved and the driver swore at someone who cut him off. I covered my face with my hands and rubbed it tears that edged their way out.
"I'm sorry..."
"Yeah... So am I..."
"What?"
"I watched it happen for eight years..." Another awkward silence filled the small confines of the car and I shifted, not sure what to do.
"Hey man, be honest, have you got somewhere to go?"
"No..."
We came to a stop and he wrote something on a sheet of paper.
"Call me if you get into trouble; just ask for Mark, I get off at 10 if you need to talk, ok?" He said and winked.
"Thanks..." I whispered, blushing slightly. This just made him laugh.
"Now get! I drove you far as I could on 20 dollars so GET!" He said smiling. I grinned and hopped out.
"Hey! What did you say your name was?"
"Uh... I never told you..."
"Well? Tell me! Better later, than never!"
"Well then, I guess I'll tell you later!" I said running down the street with a huge smile. He honked and I laughed.
It felt good. Laughing... Smiling... It’s kind of surprising. I suppose I forgot how good it felt to smile. I can blame that fuzzy good feeling on endorphins… or something…
It was downtown Toronto, around 9pm and I was already frozen to the bone.
Damn you January!
I gripped the paper like it was my last life line (Hell, it probably was!) and tucked it into my pocket. I huddled into a corner on the street. My clothes were already grubby and nobody bothered with me. I sat on the filthy pavement and held a hand out. I smiled at a little girl who handed me 2 dollars.
Wow... Awesome! Right on the first go to! I smiled at her. Her cheeks lit up with a scarlet burst. I chuckled and she ran back to her mother who glared at me like I was a piece of crap.
Hey, I know I'm 'cute' for a five foot six blonde headed twerp... I get it. I look like a typical 'Pretty' boy.
I wasn't being a pervert or anything. I just smiled is all... So what was that ladies problem?
Whatever...
I got about 3 more dollars in quarters, nickels and a dime, after that and that's it...
"FUCK! It’s so freaking cold!" I hissed and ran across the street. A pay phone booth shone brightly in the dim lighting of the night. I popped the quarters into it and Mark answered. As soon as he heard me - even through the phone, I could tell he was smiling when he spoke.
"Hey man, aren’t you cold?" he teased.
"My ass is freezing!"
"Sucker! Hey,"
"What?"
"You never told me your name"
"Oh"
"It’s later? So what is it?"
"Not late enough so... Pick me up and I might tell you" I said smiling.
Yep... It definitely feels good to smile...
He snickered and spoke to someone. I heard a banging noise and someone swore.
"Damn it Talon! You know how hard it is to get beet juice out of a white shirt!?"
"I don't think you can sorry dude" Someone said from the other end of the line.
The voice was full, deep toned and made my body feel leaden and stiff. I heard the voice laugh and heat raced up my spine, settling into my cheeks.
What the hell!?
"Hey! I'm running on quarters here!" I said quickly trying to deter my mind from the heavy velvet voice.
'PLEASE INSERT 75 CENTS TO CONTINUE'
"Shit man where are you? I'll pick you up" He asked. He was acting a little too friendly, I was just some stranger of the street, what did I matter to him?
What a weirdo... A nice weirdo... But a weirdo none the less.
"Uh... You know where you dropped me off?"
"Yeah? Your still there ok don't g-" What the…
That S O B pay phone cut him off!
CLACK
I slammed the phone down and stood outside of the booth with a sigh. The bench that sat next to it was occupied by an old dude in rags.
"Hello" I said smiling he swore at me.
"This is my bench! Ye' can't have it!" He cried angrily.
"What? No I'm not going to take your bench sorry sir, I was just saying hi" I said and he slouched back into his seat.
"You’re new ain’t ye?" He asked.
"New?" I asked. What the hell did he mean ‘New’?
"To the streets, you’re new! You just ran away or got kicked out or some shit"
"Uh... Yeah..." He pulled the rags closer to himself. I stopped and pulled off my winter coat. It’s a piece of crap but its waterproof and better than the stitched together clothes he wore...
I set it over him and he jumped.
"What the hell are ye' doing boy?" He asked scowling.
"You look cold..." I muttered he looked at me for a minute.
"Yup, New"
"Thanks?"
"You can sit here for a minute or two but I need my sleep! It’s going to rain and I don't want to be awake when it does..." He growled. I smiled. He moved a bit and I sat down. The bench was freezing!
"Good god old man, how in hell aren’t you a Hobo Sickle!?"
"What? Don't call me old man! I ain’t a Hobo Sickle! And I'm not the one that's shivering kid..." He snapped.
I was cold yes but I was fine. He was old and probably felt chilled to the bone. I didn't like the thought of him ill. He was already homeless why would he want to be sick to?
"You’re just like my Grandpa... Grouchy, rough around the edges, and you stink!" I said laughing. He glared at me and kicked me off the bench. I groaned picking myself up.
"Hey! It’s kind of nice having something close to home, especially right now, I didn't mean anything by that..." I said honestly and he grumbled scooting over a bit. I sat back down and we talked for a while about his life be-fore the streets. He was good company. I liked him already...
"So kid, ye' got a name?" He asked. I looked down.
Faggot. Waste of space. Fairy. Worthless.
"I... I have a few..." I said faintly feeling my emotions flow uneasily.
"Eh? Oh... Well? What do you WANT to be called?"
"What?"
"You don't have to keep your OLD name, if you don’t like it... Just changed it"
"To what?"
"I don't know it’s your life... My old name was Curtis but I go by Jerry now... Curtis was... Well he's not around much no more" he said, shaking his head.
"Uh, my name is Ben Falls"
"What do you want to call yourself?"
"I don't know"
"Awe come on! Just muster one up in that thick skull ‘a yers" he said smiling a patchwork tooth grin. I groaned and leaned my head back. A sigh escaped my lips as I remembered my Mom and I smelled the damp earth faintly. I knew my mind was already made up for me...
"Rayne"
"Rain? Well if you want to sound like a girl then sure but, Rain? Really who the hell wants to be named after the weather?"
"Not Rain, like R-a-i-n"
"What?"
"Rayne, as in R-a-y-n-e"
"What's the difference? They both sound the same to me"
"Rain, R-a-i-n is like you said - the weather. And then you have Rayne, R-a-y-n-e… Its special and sweet, gentle and caring, it’s weak and defenseless... It’s so fragile and easy to break... But strong willed all the same... That's R-a-y-n-e"
"What are you some kind of a psycho eccentric? You’re not going to last long out here on the streets if you keep up that girly talk shit" He said sarcastically, rolling his eyes.
"It’s my Moms name..."
"Oh... Uh what happened to her?"
"She left me behind when Dad started... To drink..."
"Oh"
"Yeah but that's the past... I forgave her the day she left, I'm free now, and that’s all that matters..." I said tilting my head back as the sky opened.
It thundered above me and I was washed by the stormy sky. They began to tug each bit of numbing pain from my body. The rain, unlike the air around me, was warm. I smiled. The water dribbled over me, beading on my shoes and the metal of the bench. I lifted my arms up and out above my head.
"Rayne... That's who I am... What I am..." I said and looked over to Jerry. He was shaking his head, eyeing me wearily.
"Yup, you’re a freak- probably a pansy to, am I right?”
“HEY!” I snapped.
“Let me finish boy!" he sighed.
"You’re the first person out here to show an ounce of interest towards a filthy old man like me since I was thrown into the streets" he laughed heartily.
I smiled.
"Can I call you Gramps?"
"What? Why?"
"I don't know you just seem more like a Gramps to me..."
"And you seem more like a midget Fabio wannabe, but that's just my opinion"
"Who?"
"Never mind... The point is it isn't what we look like-"
"You’re not going to go all 'don't judge a book by its cover' are you?" I groaned. I hated lectures but 'don't Judge' was one of my least favorites... Sure they all sounded different but they all ended in the same way...
Don't judge, be kind to others, Blah, Blah, Blah...
"Well!" He huffed "So what if I was!?"
I grinned and tugged the hat down over his eyes. He fixed it and grumbled.
HONK
"There's my ride! Sorry Gramps I’ve got to go... Hope you like my jacket"
"I do! I think it makes me look pimp!" I nearly fell over laughing when he popped the collar and made a motion like he was scratching records.
He frowned and stuck his nose up in the air. I stood and handed him the last of my change. It wasn't much but I hoped it helped. He smiled.
"Newb... don’t go giving away your money! Not that I mind but… still!"
"See you later Gramps"
"And stop calling me that!"
"NEVER!" I cried and jumped into Marks car. Gramps sat looking grumpy once again but the slight twinkle in his eye made me smile.
"Smart ass..." He grunted just loud enough for me to hear and lay down. He got comfy under the waterproof coat and smiled at me. I gave him a thumbs up and he rolled his eyes.
"Who was that?"
"A friend I think..."
"Cool"
"So where are we headed?" I asked Mark.
"Nowhere until you tell me what the hell your name is!"
"Is it really that important?" He frowned and looked pissed.
"Well I-"
"Rayne”
"What?"
"My name, its Rayne... Rayne Falls" I chuckled finally realizing what my full name was now.
That's kind of stupid but whatever...
"Really?" He asked giving me a cocky smirk.
"Just drive! So now will you tell me where the hell we are going?"
"My house"
"Cool" my stomach grumbled.
"When was the last time you ate?" Mark asked. His voice spelled out worry plain as day so I lied.
"Uh... Last night?"
Yeah right... Try four days ago...
"Change of plans... Food first then house"
"What? No I can't ask you to feed me!"
"I’m not asking, I’m telling" He said giving me a look that reminded me of Mom...
I rubbed my empty belly and got comfy in the worn car. I closed my eyes for a second and the next thing I knew I was asleep.

❧
SNAP!
I was being hit by Dad. The broken bat slicing into my back as I screamed in agony. He hit me again and again...
Tears streaked their way down my cheeks marking the floor with little pools of clarity. Blood intermingled with the tears and I cried harder.
The bat cracked across my lower back and I hit the dirt coated floor. He grabbed my hair.
"Faggot lick it!" He growled shoving me towards the red mess. I refused and he hit me harder. I screamed and begged him to stop but he refused.
"IT’S YOUR OWN DAMN FAULT!" He bellowed.
A hand took hold of my arm as I was shaken. The hand stopped shaking me and it drifted down to my hand. Something hot was pressed to it and I remembered the time Dad decided to burn me with an old fry pan. It got hotter and hotter and I faintly heard his crackling voice laughing-

❧

"Dad NO!" I wailed and kicked out at him. I opened my eyes and saw a startled Mark.
I covered my face and felt tears run through my fingers. Mark leaned forward putting a hand on my back.
"Whoa Rayne, hey little guy… You ok?" I smelled French fries and pulled away from my hands, he was holding the food. My stomach growled louder and he handed me a large container of fresh fries. I saw a coffee in his other hand and he smiled.
"Nope this one’s mine, sorry dude" he said taking a sip. I plowed through the fries. Every burning hot greasy bit of the delicious salty food was heaven in my mouth... Mark sat back in the seat and turned his head to look at me.
"What was the dream about?"
"Nothing..." I felt my cheeks redden and become wet. He reached into the front and handed me a Kleenex. I took it and wiped my eyes.
I'm such a frigin wimp...
"Never mind its fine, I've got to get you back to the house though, I told my roommates I'd be back in twenty, it’s been a lot longer" he said cheerily and I nodded.
He got into the front seat as I licked my fingers clean. We drove to a huge building with a big sign hanging just above its entrance. The lights under it were blown out and there wasn’t enough light to make out the words on it.
I glanced at it and then back at Mark. He just shrugged and got out. I was pulled through the door, up a flight of stairs and into a giant living room in a matter of minutes.
A smaller room that I assumed was the kitchen sat off to the side and I heard a clattering of dishes.
"Hey Talon! Get your fat ass out here and meet Rayne!"
"I'll have you know that my ass is a picture of perfection!" The creamy deep voice from on the telephone called out.
"Hurry up!" Mark called grinning.
"Talon? The guy’s name is... a birds... foot?" I started to laugh quietly and Mark rolled his eyes. He kicked off his shoes and I was still in the process of taking mine off when a guy came out of the Kitchen. My breath caught in my throat as I took him in.
"Stupid beets stained my shirt!" He cried yanking his top off. The grey shirt slipped off revealing an angel. I sucked in a breath when I took in the image of his shirt-less self.
It was perfect. He was perfect. Smooth dark chocolate skin seemed to ripple over his muscles. He wasn't overly buff, but he was lean.
He carried a sarcastic air about him. His eyes were a caramel tint that seemed almost like ambers. His lips parted to form the perfect smile as he laughed at something Mark said. I tried to tear my gaze from him but he looked over at me and his eyes captured mine. He stared at me and the goofy grin faded into a small gentle smile. Everything seemed to disappear.
"RAYNE!" Mark called. The angel/guy shook his head and the huge smile returned. Mark snapped his fingers in front of my eyes and I jumped back, falling over the arm of the couch. My feet flying up and my other shoe soared through the air landing in the kitchen.
"Ouch..." I grunted.
"MY BEETS!" The angel yelled. Beets? Wait, what?
"Beets?"
"Sorry... He's obsessed with food... I think your shoe landed on the counter or something, do you like Beets?"
"Yeah... Food is food, I'm not picky" I said. I rolled off the couch and groaned. Mark laughed and the other boy-Talon came out smiling. His hands gripping my shoe.
Oh... This isn't fare...
"What's not fare?" Mark asked.
"Eh?"
"You said 'that's not fare' so, what's not fare?" Talon asked with a smirk.
"I... I said that out loud?" I asked stupidly.
“Yup! Now, what’s not fare?” Talon asked.
"N-Nothing!" I froze as he stretched teasingly. He winked at me and I turned away.
"Even your little friend here thinks I'm hot..." He said smiling my way. I knew I was blushing like an idiot but I couldn't help it.
The phone rang.
"I'll be right back" Mark said quickly and left the room. I kept trying to say something when Talon walked over; tossing aside the shoe he grabbed me.
"Hey!" I yelped trying to pull away.
"What are you doing-!?" a hand was clamped over my mouth and Talon stood me up strait.
“Chill out babe” He chuckled like it was frigin hilarious!
He lifted me up and turned setting me down on the couch on his lap to look me over. When I tried to get up he kept a firm grip on me. He let go of my mouth and I kept getting flashbacks, The Bat, The Pain, He was controlling me like Dad! I just escaped this! Not again! I can’t do it again! I CAN’T!
"GET AWAY FROM ME!" I screamed. Tears started to spill over and hands dragged Talon from my trembling body.
"Hey man I was only joking around no harm done!" Talon said with a confused look.
Mark was holding me still as I fought against him, desperately trying to get to the door. Finally I collapsed into his arms sobbing. He held me tight to his side, whispering reassuring words occasionally.
"What's wrong with him?"
"Remember what I told you about my sister?"
"Yeah what's that have to do with anything?"
"You know how she died? Yeah well... he got away…" Mark said under his breath.
“That’s shitty but what does it have to do with me?”
“I’ll explain later, alright?” Mark waved a hand for him to leave and the defeated looking Talon sulked away.
"I'm sorry" He whispered as he left.
"He didn't mean to scare you..." Mark said with a gentle smile. I squeezed my eyes shut and breathed in. He smelled. Not bad. Just heavy...
I felt him lifting my body up. He walked down a hall and set me down somewhere soft.
"Sleep. I'll be back in the morning" I heard Mark murmur as I drifted off...