I'll Be Okay

The sun shining through the window woke me up the next morning. Before I could even open my eyes, I felt my head pounding painfully. With a really loud and unfeminine groan, I rubbed my hands over my face to rid the sleep from my eyes. One eye cracked open, though, when I felt the uncomfortable fabric clung to my right hand. And suddenly, all of my memories from last night flew at me like a ton of bricks and I closed my eyes again, letting out another loud groan. I fucked up. Big time.

It took me a good 20 minutes to get up out of bed and wobble into the bathroom, fishing around for some aspirin. Grabbing my phone from the floor, I sulked into the kitchen and filled up a glass with water, downing the pills instantly. Dropping the cup into the sink, I rubbed my hands over my face once more before I picked up my phone to unlock it. Just as I was typing in my password, Jenn’s face showed up with an incoming call and music filled the room. I quickly pressed answer as I felt my head pound even harder in my head.

“Fuck, Jenn.” I muttered, holding the phone up to my ear. Running my hand through my messy hair, I leaned against the counter and sighed loudly.

“Good morning, sunshine!” She exclaimed, causing me to wince.

“Please, for the love of God, keep your voice down.” My voice rasped, causing her to laugh softly through the phone.

“Sorry, I forgot about how bad your hangovers are.” She talked in a low voice but considering my head was pounding wildly, I felt like she was yelling right in my ear. Wincing loudly, I hopped up on the counter, holding my head.

“And I forgot you don’t even get hangovers.” I muttered, running my hand through my tangled hair. I pulled the ends of my hair out in front of me and began running my fingers through it, to try and get rid of the horribly tangled hair. My phone started making a loud beeping sound and I pulled it away from my face. An unknown caller was calling me? Furrowing my eyebrows, I pressed ignore and started listening to Jenn again. If it was something or someone important, they’ll leave a voicemail.

“I’m just that lucky.” She giggled, causing me to roll my eyes in annoyance. “But I did call for a reason. Two reasons, actually. First, do you remember anything from last night?” She sounded worried, causing me to lean my head back on the cabinets above the counters. Groaning lowly, I nodded my head; even though she couldn’t see me.

“Sadly.” I whispered, causing her to giggle once more.

“Then I bet you remember your very impressive right hook.” I groaned in response. “That’s what I thought. And in case you want a reminder, it’s all over YouTube. Gio sent me a link this morning. Apparently someone videoed it that was in one of the stalls or something? Anyways, apparently you are growing popular online.” She giggled once more and I felt my face drain of all color.

“There’s a video? Are you kidding? Danny is going to be so pissed. Shit. Jenn, this is not good.” I spoke out in rush, holding my head in my right hand, ignoring the throbbing.

“Chill. The video was taken down. Not before I saved it, of course. It was only viral for like 20 minutes.” I breathed out a sigh of relief. “Oh yeah, the second reason I’m calling is because I wanted to know if you wanted to go check out Uni today. I mean, I know we were both accepted and we took the virtual tour together, but I kinda want to check it out in person.” Jenn’s voice started to rise with her excitement and I took a deep breath, trying to hold in a groan.

“Yeah, yes, sure. Just please, stop talking.” I whispered, causing her to giggle on my behalf. I hung my head, holding the water bottle against my forehead. “What time do you want to leave?”

“Probably closer to 1.” I looked over at the clock beside the stove and slipped down from the counter. 10:30.

“Alright then, come over when you’re ready. I have a date with my shower.”

*`*

“So I think the English hall is this way.” She pointed somewhere to her right and I just followed her, looking around at my surroundings. Considering its mid-October, the wind was spiraling around us and I kept pulling my jacket tighter and tighter around my chest. We’ve already walked around the campus for a few hours, and our last tour is to the English hall. I looked at my watch and it read 5:20.

“Is this our last stop? I’m starved.” While rolling her eyes, Jenn pulled out the broacher and held it out to me. Checking over the map, I nodded. “Yeah, you crossed off everything else. When we’re done, can we please go get food?”

“Stop whining. I forgot you were five years old.” Huffing in annoyance, I crossed my arms over my chest and kept walking. “Example number 2.” She muttered, causing me to bump my arm into hers. Laughing loudly, she stuck her tongue out at me.

“Yeah, I’m the five year old!” I grinned, causing her to laugh loudly once more. After checking out the English hall, Jenn wrapped her right arm through my left and pulled me out into Central London. After wondering down a few streets, we came upon a small, cute diner and she pulled me inside behind her.

“So, have you talked to Danny today?” Jenn asked, putting her menu to the side. After deciding on what I wanted, I put my menu to the side as well and played around with my hands.

“Well, I mean…not exactly…” I breathed. Raising her eyebrows, Jenn leaned forward. “I mean, I texted him at like 12 to ask what show he was playing today. But all he said was the name of the venue and that he had to go.” I shrugged, playing around with the salt shaker. “Do you think he got in trouble or something?” I looked up at Jenn and she was biting her lip in thought.

“Hm, I talked to Harry earlier and he didn’t say Danny was angry. I asked about what management said about last night and he didn’t really say much; just that it was a dreadful conversation. He really wouldn’t go into much detail because they had to get ready for a show.” The waitress showed up at that moment to take our order and Jenn smiled softly at her. “I’ll take the chicken sandwich please, with water.”

“I’ll get that as well.” I mused, handing over our menus.

“Alright, it’ll be right out!” The waitress disappeared through the kitchen doors and Jenn pulled out her cell phone, unlocking the screen.

“I still haven’t heard back.” She mused, tapping her bottom lip. “We’ll call them after dinner, I suppose. Or, I mean, you’ll call Danny and finally ask him what’s going on.” She gave me a pointed look, causing me to nod my head with a roll of my eyes. “How’s your hand, anyways?” I looked down at my right hand and I groaned, holding it up for her to see my bandaged fist.

“You don’t even understand how much it bloody hurts. And I can’t exactly move my fingers without feeling the pain shoot through my swollen knuckles.” I complained, rubbing my hand softly. “It definitely didn’t hurt this much last night.”

“Well you were pretty smashed last night so I can imagine how numb you were.” Raising an eyebrow, I leaned on the table and took a deep breath. “Seriously though, she totally deserved the punch. She’s been a crazy bitch for weeks now and it was bound to happen. I’m glad I got to witness it. But I am kinda sorry I couldn’t help.” She frowned at that and I felt my smile slip through.

“Well thank you for getting me out of there. I was slightly smashed.” I giggled, causing Jenn to grin. Taking a deep breath, I ran my left hand through my hair. “I just hope I didn’t get Danny in big trouble.” I grimaced.

“You’ll find out soon enough, I’m sure. For now, let’s eat!” Just as she said that, the waitress came walking over carrying our dinner.

*`*

“You still haven’t heard from him?” It’s been a few hours and we’ve retired to mine and Danny’s flat. I looked around at Gio, Emily, and then Jenn, who had just spoken, and I shook my head sadly. “Not even a text?” She asked, causing me to shake my head once more. I threw my head back on the couch and Gio leaned over, patting my arm.

“I’m sure he’ll call you soon.” Gio mused, nodding her head enthusiastically. Emily agreed from my other side, smile encouragingly, but sitting across from us on the recliner; Jenn hummed loudly.

“I’m just wondering why he hasn’t at least tried to Skype you yet. Don’t you usually Skype around this time?” I looked over at the clock next to the kitchen and I nodded once more. Five minutes ago. “Well then get your laptop out. Hurry up, now. He might have been trying to Skype you for the past hour for all you know.” I sent her a small smile before I jumped up, running into the bedroom to grab my laptop. After taking my seat once more between Gio and Emily, I felt Jenn lean on the couch behind us to take a look at my screen.

“I’ve been signed on this whole time and there’s nothing. Not even a missed chat.” I spoke in a soft whisper, closing my eyes briefly before opening them, hoping I had seen it wrong. Still nothing. “He’s not even signed on.” With a heavy sigh, I leaned forward and placed my laptop on the coffee table. “Have you guys talked to them today?” I asked, turning to look at Gio and Emily. They both nodded silently. “And they didn’t say anything about last night? Or talking to management?” I pushed, raising my eyebrows. Once again, they shook their heads. “And nothing about Danny?” I barely got it out, his nape caught in my throat. Sadly, they shook their heads a final time. Nodding my head once, I stood up and made my way into the kitchen with them following two steps behind me.

“Lindsey, I’m sure everything’s alright-”

“But you don’t know, do you?” I cut Jenn off, spinning around to face her. “No body knows anything about what’s going on with Danny and he won’t even pick up the fucking phone and answer me. I have called him numerous times and he just sends me to voicemail, I have texted him day in and day out and all I got was one reply saying that he had to go, and he didn’t even attempt to call me for our Skype date.” I ranted, running my hand through my messy hair. Jenn leaned on the counter beside me and Gio took a seat beside Emily at the breakfast bar. I stepped back, leaning on the counter across from the three of them. “How am I supposed to talk to him if he wont even answer me?” I whispered, holding my phone up. “All I wanted was a call this morning telling me what was going on so I could finally react to all of this. I have been holding on by a tiny thread for hours and I don’t even know what to do with myself. Should I make a statement? Tell people what really happened? Should I drive up to Danny and talk to him in person so it’s impossible for him to keep ignoring me? Or should I just forget about it and move on? What the hell am I supposed to do because I can’t just stand by my phone all day and wait for it to bloody ring! If that’s the case, then I am going to go insane. Maybe even more insane then I already am right now.” I took a deep breath, running my hand through my hair once more. “What. Do. I. Do?” I whispered, looking around them for help.

“There’s nothing you really can do.” Emily muttered, shrugging her shoulder. “I mean, the only way to contact him is calling him and that doesn’t seem to be working.” She stopped short, and if it were possible, a light bulb lit up above her head. “Wait, I’ll call Dougie and I’ll ask to speak to Danny and I’ll give you the phone.” She quickly pulled out her phone and I stepped up beside her. I could hear the dial tone because of how close I was and as soon as she pulled the phone up to her ear, I felt a breath leave my lips.

“I hope he answers.” Jenn mused. And just like that, he answered.

“Doug, hi.” Emily muttered, a smile instantly appearing on her face. “I’m good, how are you? How was the show? Really? Wow, that’s awesome! Hey, listen, is Dan there? Well, can I talk to him real quick? Thank you!” Before she could even finish the last sentence, she was handing the phone to me and I quickly pressed it to my ear.

“”ello?” Instantly, I felt one hundred times better; just hearing his voice.

“Hi.” I whispered, causing the other side of the phone to go completely silent. All of the background noise I had heard a second ago completely disappeared and I heard a door close. Looking up at my three best friends, they watched with nervous looks on their faces as I brought my right hand up to my chest.

“Linds.” He breathed, sounding almost relieved. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. “Hi, how are you? How’s your hand?” He asked nonchalant. My eyebrows furrowed even more.

“Fine, bandaged up and feeling better.” I muttered, taking a seat at the breakfast bar beside Emily. Three pairs of eyes were on me as I looked behind Jenn and at the empty wall. “H-How are you?” I stuttered, running my hand over my pounding heart.

“Brilliant, brilliant. I’ve been meaning to call you, actually-” I cut him off, instantly feeling all of the frustration from earlier pile on.

“That’s funny.” I spoke abruptly, causing him to stop talking instantly. Jenn, Gio, and Emily stared at me wide eyed. “That’s funny because I’ve been calling you all day and you’ve been sending me to voicemail.” Somehow, my voice didn’t waver and I started feeling calmer. “Why have you been sending me to voicemail?” I whispered, leaning my arms on the table as I ran my free hand over my face.

“I-I haven’t.” He stuttered out. Instantly I grew confused because he almost sounded…offended? “Why would I send you to voicemail?” He asked.

“You tell me.” That definitely came out harsher than I intended.

“I would tell you if I was actually sending you to voicemail. But I haven’t. I didn’t. My phone’s been off since this morning when I dropped it at rehearsal. The whole screen shattered and I’ve been up Matt’s ass asking him to go get me a new one. Everyone’s been on their phones all day so I tried calling you earlier on the phone at the venue but your phone just kept ringing. Did you get my voicemail?” Smacking my forehead, I groaned loudly. “I take that as a no.” He chuckled, and for the first time in hours, I smiled an actual genuine smile. “Did you really think I was ignoring you?”

“Yes.” I muttered, laughing softly at myself. I looked up at my three best friends and they looked over at me hopefully. Giving them thumbs up, they all sighed in relief. “I thought you were still mad about last night-” Danny cut me off with a chuckle.

“Linds, that’s already been settled. I talked to management and they’re going to take care of it. I’m not mad. Actually, Gio send me the video she saved and damn, baby, you have a better right hook than I thought.” A laugh fell through my lips. “I’m impressed and proud. It’s good to know that you know how to take care of yourself.” He chuckled and I felt my smile fall into place.

“That’s right, don’t mess with me.” I grinned, and he chuckled once more. “I still have my knuckles bandaged up, though. They’re pretty swollen.” I mused, looking down at my right hand. “I think I hand an imprint of Rachel’s fake nose between my knuckles.” I looked up at Jenn, Gio, and Emily and grinned widely as Danny laughed loudly over the phone.

“I love you.” He whispered and I felt my face heat up. Smiling shyly, I ran my hand through my hair and sighed.

“I love you, too, Danny.” I sighed. “Is it November 3rd yet? I want you back home.”

“Only 21 more days, love.”

“That’s too far away.”

“You’re telling me.”

“I am telling you, and I’m going to tell you again: that’s too far away.”

“I miss you,” he breathed, and just like that, I knew we were going to be okay.