Lie To Me, Just One More Time
Too Little Too Late
I look through the apartment ads my agent gave me and settle on looking at five potential homes.
“Message received.”
My phone alerts me to a new text message. After scheduling another appointment to meet, so I could look at the apartments, I leave. I check my phone as I get into my car.
Can we talk?
It's from Eric. I sigh and slip the phone back into my pocket ignoring him. Again my phone goes off.
Kelsey, please don't ignore me. I text back quickly.
I'm busy at the moment.
Really? Or do u just not want to talk?
I'm in a meeting with my agent about apartments.
So this is real? U aren't coming back home?
What home Eric? The one where I sit on a couch while u live your dreams?
Kels...
That's what I thought Eric. U can't even realize how much it hurts to be put on the back burner of the person u love's life.
I don't do that.
Really? Who knows we were together Eric? Ur mom, sister? Hell, I would have even taken a hint that u were seeing someone. Instead I got lies and secret meetings.
What can I say other than I'm sorry? I'll tell them when I think it's a good time.
And when will that be Eric? When everyone in your family dies?
That's not fair.
You aren't fair.
Please come home.
I don't have a home with u anymore.
What if I tell my sister? Will u come back then?
Idk...
It's the best I can offer u!
Then no. Eric this shouldn't be a compromise! U should WANT to tell people about us. I shouldn't have to leave 4 u to.
I do want ppl 2 no Kels. It's just hard. We come out as a couple and my family's gonna go crazy bc of what you are.
Bc I'm Muslim? Well, I wouldn't want what other ppl think to hurt you so badly...
Damn it Kelsey! Nothing I do pleases u!
That's not true! Eric, you're hiding me bc I call my God something different, bc you're scared that you're family won't love you anymore bc I'm not Catholic, and that isn't fair to me. You knew what I was when we started this relationship. And now that I'm not putting up with your bullshit anymore you want to work it out. Too late.
Fine! Don't come back then!
Fine! I won't!
Good!
Fan fucking tastic Eric! Another relationship ruined for u! Happy? I sure hope so!
Ecstatic!
I re-read our conversation and thought about all the different ways it could have gone. I drive home and go straight to my room. I turn on my laptop and wait for it to wake up. I tap the keys angrily and read the latest gossipy tabloid. My phone starts to ring and I dread answering it.
“Hello?” I ask not recognizing the number.
“Kelsey?”
“Yes?” I ask.
“When were you going to let me know you're dating my brother?” I've never actually met his sister, I don't even know her name, not that I haven't tried for forever to get such little information.
“I'm not.” I say honestly.
“That's not what he just told me.”
“Well, he's trying to make up to me by telling you about us and I'm not forgiving him this time. Sorry you wasted the call.” I say coldly knowing Eric is probably sitting right there listening.
“Wait! Kelsey. Why is Eric trying to make up?” She asks.
“He broke my heart one too many times.” I say simply.
“What do you mean?” She asks.
“What do I mean? I mean that Eric just told you about us right?”
“Yeah.”
“We were a couple for four years.” I let her know. She's completely silent.
“Kelsey! I'm sorry, okay?” Eric says. I knew he was there.
“That's too little too late Eric. I'm done with you. With us.” I say.
“But I told her. What else do you want?” He sounds tired.
“I want you to need me Eric. I want you to wake up everyday and think of me before anything else! I want you look at me without any make-up on and still think I'm beautiful. I want a gorgeous girl to walk by and you not to look at her because I'm enough for you! I want to feel needed and not just there as a trophy. I want, I want to be the only girl for you Eric Monroe. And I want you to be proud that you have me!” I'm crying now.
“Kelsey you are all that to me!” Eric says.
“No, I'm not and I know that Eric. It breaks my heart but I understand that I love you so much more than you love me. I know that I wake up and miss you when you aren't next to me. I know that no matter what I do or say I'm only another girlfriend to you, not the love of your life.” I wipe away tears but they keep coming.
“Kelsey, I'm only twenty two, how am I suppose to know if your the girl for me? That you're the only one I'll want forever?”
“You just are. I know and if you did Eric, you wouldn't have to ask me that.”
“But I want you back.” Eric says quietly.
“I'll come back the day you wake up and hate not seeing me there with you. When you see me and your heart breaks knowing that I'm not yours anymore. Until then please don't call me. Don't text me or write.” I hate this.
“But-”
“Good-bye Eric.” I say hanging up the phone.
“Message received.”
My phone alerts me to a new text message. After scheduling another appointment to meet, so I could look at the apartments, I leave. I check my phone as I get into my car.
Can we talk?
It's from Eric. I sigh and slip the phone back into my pocket ignoring him. Again my phone goes off.
Kelsey, please don't ignore me. I text back quickly.
I'm busy at the moment.
Really? Or do u just not want to talk?
I'm in a meeting with my agent about apartments.
So this is real? U aren't coming back home?
What home Eric? The one where I sit on a couch while u live your dreams?
Kels...
That's what I thought Eric. U can't even realize how much it hurts to be put on the back burner of the person u love's life.
I don't do that.
Really? Who knows we were together Eric? Ur mom, sister? Hell, I would have even taken a hint that u were seeing someone. Instead I got lies and secret meetings.
What can I say other than I'm sorry? I'll tell them when I think it's a good time.
And when will that be Eric? When everyone in your family dies?
That's not fair.
You aren't fair.
Please come home.
I don't have a home with u anymore.
What if I tell my sister? Will u come back then?
Idk...
It's the best I can offer u!
Then no. Eric this shouldn't be a compromise! U should WANT to tell people about us. I shouldn't have to leave 4 u to.
I do want ppl 2 no Kels. It's just hard. We come out as a couple and my family's gonna go crazy bc of what you are.
Bc I'm Muslim? Well, I wouldn't want what other ppl think to hurt you so badly...
Damn it Kelsey! Nothing I do pleases u!
That's not true! Eric, you're hiding me bc I call my God something different, bc you're scared that you're family won't love you anymore bc I'm not Catholic, and that isn't fair to me. You knew what I was when we started this relationship. And now that I'm not putting up with your bullshit anymore you want to work it out. Too late.
Fine! Don't come back then!
Fine! I won't!
Good!
Fan fucking tastic Eric! Another relationship ruined for u! Happy? I sure hope so!
Ecstatic!
I re-read our conversation and thought about all the different ways it could have gone. I drive home and go straight to my room. I turn on my laptop and wait for it to wake up. I tap the keys angrily and read the latest gossipy tabloid. My phone starts to ring and I dread answering it.
“Hello?” I ask not recognizing the number.
“Kelsey?”
“Yes?” I ask.
“When were you going to let me know you're dating my brother?” I've never actually met his sister, I don't even know her name, not that I haven't tried for forever to get such little information.
“I'm not.” I say honestly.
“That's not what he just told me.”
“Well, he's trying to make up to me by telling you about us and I'm not forgiving him this time. Sorry you wasted the call.” I say coldly knowing Eric is probably sitting right there listening.
“Wait! Kelsey. Why is Eric trying to make up?” She asks.
“He broke my heart one too many times.” I say simply.
“What do you mean?” She asks.
“What do I mean? I mean that Eric just told you about us right?”
“Yeah.”
“We were a couple for four years.” I let her know. She's completely silent.
“Kelsey! I'm sorry, okay?” Eric says. I knew he was there.
“That's too little too late Eric. I'm done with you. With us.” I say.
“But I told her. What else do you want?” He sounds tired.
“I want you to need me Eric. I want you to wake up everyday and think of me before anything else! I want you look at me without any make-up on and still think I'm beautiful. I want a gorgeous girl to walk by and you not to look at her because I'm enough for you! I want to feel needed and not just there as a trophy. I want, I want to be the only girl for you Eric Monroe. And I want you to be proud that you have me!” I'm crying now.
“Kelsey you are all that to me!” Eric says.
“No, I'm not and I know that Eric. It breaks my heart but I understand that I love you so much more than you love me. I know that I wake up and miss you when you aren't next to me. I know that no matter what I do or say I'm only another girlfriend to you, not the love of your life.” I wipe away tears but they keep coming.
“Kelsey, I'm only twenty two, how am I suppose to know if your the girl for me? That you're the only one I'll want forever?”
“You just are. I know and if you did Eric, you wouldn't have to ask me that.”
“But I want you back.” Eric says quietly.
“I'll come back the day you wake up and hate not seeing me there with you. When you see me and your heart breaks knowing that I'm not yours anymore. Until then please don't call me. Don't text me or write.” I hate this.
“But-”
“Good-bye Eric.” I say hanging up the phone.