And Love Walked In

All night as I lay on a cold wooden bench I couldn't help but smile. I was beyond thankful for Emerson taking me to dinner tonight, he feed me for the first time in almost a full month. But I couldn't shake off the guilty feeling that I just left him there expecting something from me. A kiss, but not a hug. I wanted to, god did I want to kiss him but I wasn't worthy of Emerson. After seeing the way he dresses and the restaurants he could afford to eat at and his home I felt like scum.

Dirty pathetic scum, lower than the ground he walks on which is probably how he'll view me after I tell him the truth.

Morning comes around quickly and I walk to the park's bathroom to make myself look less homeless. I wash my face with cold water and turn my shirt and under wear inside out before walking back out. I hate this, I hate living like this. I hate no being able to sleep in a bed and wake up to take a shower and eat food. I hate knowing I'll never match up to Emerson, he'll be embarrassed of m.

I get to the coffee house surprised to see Mel, the owner, already starting up the machines. Usually she just opens up and lets me take care of everything. "Mel what's up?" I ask walking in and helping her with the machines.

"Well you look like shit." she says being completely blunt. "Rough night?"

"Yeah." I sigh grabbing my apron and putting it on. "So you never answered my question."

"Just decided to stop by. How's the shop holding up?"

"Good." I say shrugging my shoulders. The first customers walk in and immediately cater to them. The day drags on, and even longer now that Mel is actually here. The shop was going to close soon and I was slightly disappointed that Emerson never showed. I thought maybe it had to do with the fact I didn't kiss him last night when he was expecting me to.

"Looks like we have one more, close up when he's out." Mel said as she slips out the shop. I look to the door seeing Emerson come in wearing a beanie and sunglasses.

"It's a bit dark out to be wearing sunglasses." I say making Emerson a cup of hot coffee.

"Don't freak out OK." he whispers as he pulls of his sunglasses exposing a black eye busing down to his cheek.

"What happened." I gasp walking to Emerson and cradling his face between my hands, my thumbs grazing over his bruise.

"I got my dad upset." he mumbles softly not looking at me.

"Emerson." I whisper softly appalled that his father would even think of hurting this boy. Emerson began to cry, tears streaming down his cheeks. I pull him into my arms and hold him tightly letting him cry on my shoulder.

"I-I d-don't want t-to go home." he cries clinging onto my shirt.

I wish I could take him somewhere, if I have an apartment I would take him home with me without a doubt. But my idea of home is a park bench, and I would never put Emerson in any form of danger. "I know. I know you don't." I whisper sitting him on a stool and handing him his drink. I watch as he drinks his coffee, we're both silent and I could see the wheels turning in his head.

"Let me stay with you." he says looking up at me with big eyes, begging me. "Please Rome, please." he's crying again and I feel guilty and ashamed that I can't help him.

"Are you done with that?" I ask taking his half empty cup and throwing the extra coffee in the sink. "You should go home now before your parents find you and get worried." I tell him turning to face him.

He's sitting there with his eyes wide and his mouth slightly open. He nods softly and grabs his sunglasses and beanie before leaving. I sigh and clean his cup before cleaning up a bit around the shop before closing up and leaving.

I walk back to the park I've grown so use and sit on the bench. I bring my knees up to my chest and wrap my arms around my legs. People walk by but ignore me, they always ignore the homeless guy. Always.