You Can't Always Walk a Straight Line, Especially If the Line Is Crooked

Once upon a time there was a girl named Cassandra. She had a sick twitter account and liked hockey. One day, her friends, Gabi and Rachel, decided to go crazy and tweet the goaltender of the Toronto Marlies, Ben Scrivens, some appropriate (but mostly inappropriate) things. Ben Scrivens obviously didn’t like that very much and blocked Cass, Gabi and Rach. They assumed it was because of the inappropriate things, and figured they deserved it so they played it off. A little while after, Cass and Gabi’s favourite player’s brother created twitter. His name was Brayden Schenn. Gabi had tweeted him a picture and he followed her, but then blocked her all in a ten minute span. Cass thought that this was very rude of Brayden, so she tweeted him and asked him to unblock her. Brayden obviously didn’t want to unblock Gabi and blocked Cass instead. Cass got very offended by this because she thought that it was unreasonable, so she went on her secondary account and start tweeting Brayden about how he was a heartbreaker. Then, he blocked that account as well. Seeing as Cass deserved that blocking, she didn’t make a big deal. A couple months later, during the AHL’s Calder Cup Finals game 1 or 2 or 3, the Toronto Marlies were playing the Norfolk Admirals. A player on Norfolk had hit one of Cass’ favourite Marlies, Jerry D’Amigo and Cass was very upset. She then tweeted a former Marlie, Keith Aulie, who played for the Norfolk Admirals. (She loved Keith Aulie very much). She tweeted him, “istg if jerry d’amigo is hurt you can consider your whole teams’ lives over ok”. He obviously took it seriously and blocked her. She was upset at first but she realized she shouldn’t have said that and understood. A week or so later, the Marlies and the Admirals were playing for the Calder cup in game 4. The Admirals won, sweeping the Marlies in the series. Cass was very upset so she tweeted Keith Aulie on her secondary account and said “I hate you” and Keith Aulie didn’t want a sad Marlies fan giving him feels so he blocked that account. The next month, a Marlie/Leaf, Matt Frattin tweeted about needing a mechanic but Cass tweeted him and asked what his favourite ice cream was and he blocked her because he’s either lactose intolerant or is too good for ice cream. A while later she tweeted him again on her other account and said, “since you never responded before, what’s your favourite ice cream?” and he blocked her again. She was very astonished by these blocks and thought it was very rude of him. Weeks later, she started tweeting Brian Gionta, the captain of the Montreal Canadiens, about how she hate him and he blocked her but she didn’t care. THE END