Peine D'amour

It was February 4th 2012, I layed in my bed and looking up at the ceiling, pressing two of my fingers to my forehead. I pressed down and applied pressure, trying to get the annoying headache to go away. I took my fingers away and then rolled over onto my side, feeling the cool blast of air from my metal fan hitting my face. I closed my eyes tightly, trying to keep my salty tears from escaping.
“Why do I love him?” I whispered to myself as I clenched my cellphone in my right hand, waiting for the beeping noise that notifies me that I have a message from my friend, Robert.
Robert is an old friend of mine, a friend that my boyfriend hates. Robert and I have a kind of friendship that we’re completely comfortable with each other and we playfully flirted with each other. It always bothered my boyfriend since he thought that Robert was going to take me away from him. My boyfriend is honestly a piece of work.
His name is Frank Romone Perez and he lived in Utah while I lived in Louisiana, so the distance was almost unbearable. He’s the most annoying, jealous, paranoid, suicidal nineteen year old asshole that I have ever met. He gets mad if I even comment on a friends facebook wall. He gets overly jealous whenever I talk to someone else on the phone and he can’t even talk to me whenever I’m hanging out with one of my friends because he’s so paranoid.
I can’t even try to talk out our problems with him because he freaks out so much thinking that I’m going to dump him that he starts to threaten me saying things like, “I’m going to kill myself, I’m not wanted in this world.”, “You’re so much better without me.”, and “I should’ve never been born.” Even in the honey moon stage of our relationship he was just as bad, it just didn’t happen as often.

I sighed loudly and pulled my covered over my body, pulling it tightly around me. I closed my eyes and began to think about my 1 year and 9 month long distance relationship. I thought all the way back to the beginning of it.

All the way back to June 6th, 2011.