Say That You Love Me

"Ugh," I rolled out of bed when the phone began ringing downstairs. Layla was still snoring on the bed beside me. A Tsunami couldn't wake that girl up.

My bed was king sized, so I barely even knew she was there. Cobus was laying on a pillow sprawled out in between us, flashing his blue eyes.

Layla rolled over, pulling the cover over her head and her snoring resumed. I could just see the sunlight peeking from behind the curtains that I had left open a crack last night.

I unraveled my green shorts that had rollen up during sleep and ran down the stairs, making it to the phone sitting on the counter beside the door.

I lifted it and placed it against my ear as I peeked out the window seeing my Wrangler sitting proud in my parking spot on the street.

I noticed the 'Honk if you love Skelleftea' bumper sticker.Odd. No one honks.

"Hello," I yawned, reaching over and turning on the coffeemaker. I knew I wasn't going to go back to bed anytime soon. Layla could go back to bed after being up for a few hours, but alas, I was born with my Mothers genes. Once I was woken up, I was up. Cobus came trotting down the steps, with this annoyed look on his face and made his way to his cat habitat and crawled into the bottom cubicle.

"Yo, Em, get dressed," Jakes irritated voice boomed, startling me.

"Jake?"

"No, the fucking Virgin Mary, just get dressed," He grumbled. "I'll be over in ten,"

"But why?" I whined, lowering myself onto the stool. I looked at the clock on my coffeemaker. "Jake, it's 7:30." I rubbed at my eyes when they began to sting. It was either caused by one of two things 1: I was tired or 2: My allergies were starting early.

"We are going for a run in the park," He hung up the phone. I glared viciously at it and set it down on the counter as I made my way back up the steps into my room. Jake was an absolute cock smith in the morning, and yet he is up constantly at the crack of dawn simply because of his football training.

He runs three times a week through the park, and invites me constantly because I used to run all the time back home when I was a dancer, so he didn't have to slow down for me or wait for me to catch up. He said I was easier to run with than some of his teammates.

Layla was now laying on her stomach, drueling into one of my pillows and the comforter was all contorted around her. She was still snoring heavily. I grabbed out my black yoga pants and a green racerback to change into as I lightly shut my closet door and turned on the light.

I had two clothes racks across the back wall of my closet, a large floor length mirror was on my left hand side and a small dresser was on my right,with a small lamp on it and a gathering of panties, bras and a bunch of clothes scattered about on my floor. The whole room was coloured a soft brown with orange on the baseboards and the door on the inside was an orange colour.

Sid and I spent a whole day during the summer painting my townhouse, he brought some guys off the team to help out and that's when I built a strong friendship with Tyler Kennedy. We had similar interests and he agreed with me when I said I wanted dark purple paint for my room and fire engine red for the baseboards. He said it would look epic. And it does.

Once I had my clothes on, I crept to the bathroom and done up my hair and minimal eye makeup. If I wore my regular makeup, it would cake up because of the sweat and make me look like complete shit.

Sid told me last night during a brief phone call, he'd be coming in around 6ish, so I could go for a run with Jake, come home and shower and clean up the house before he gets here.

I pulled my hair into a high pony and applied a headband before slipping my ankle socks on and walking out into my room. Cobus was now back on my bed beside Layla. I grabbed my phone off the end table and checked my text messages showing up none.
It was weird for Sid to not text me in the morning. I shrugged it off, knowing he probably had an early morning skate.

I loved how absolutely dedicated to this sport Sidney was. He was always the first one in the arena and the last one to leave. I've seen him go into practice at 7:30, when it starts at 8:30 and not leave until noon, three hours after it ends.

My eyes moved to the bed when Layla rolled over and yawned, as she sat up and rubbed at her eyes, moving them to where I was. "Why are you up?" She grumbled, climbing out of my bed and moving towards the bathroom. "It's 7:30."

"Jak-" I started before she shut the bathroom door. I smiled to myself and began making the bed. I knew if I told Layla I was going for a run with Jake, she'd come with us.

Layla was not athletic for the most part, although she did play softball at her highschool in her hometown of Boston, Massacheusets, but got kicked off for a violent encounter with an opposing player. She lasted about a month on the team. On our runs, she watches our stuff and catches up on her reading.

I got the sheets on and grabbed up the comforter off the ground. It was blue with green stripes. Layla flushed the toilet and came walking out of the bathroom, pulling her hair into a side braid. "What are you doing?" She asked, crossing her arms over her chest. She borrowed my plaid PJ shorts and one of my tanks because she came straight from class to the coffeehouse and didn't know ahead of time she was coming here.

"Making the bed," I smiled, throwing the comforter on the bed. Layla quickly walked around and helped me make it straight. My pillows were covered in blue and white striped pillowcases. "Oh, Jake's gonna be here any minute to pick us up,"

"Oooh why?" Layla smiled brightly, tossing the pillows at the head of the bed. I owned a dark brown sleigh bed.

"Jake and I are going for a run, you gonna come?" I asked, sliding my Zigtechs on my feet as Layla moved from putting the final pillow on the bed to going in my closet.

"Probably," She yelled. I grabbed up my grey BSC hoodie and pulled it on. Even though I was from Sweden, Buffalo still got cold in the Winter. I grabbed Layla's tote off the ground and stuffed her clothes from yesterday into it and my phone made it's way into the front pocket.

"Morning bitches," Jake threw open my door and walked in, cracking his knuckles on both of his hands as his eyes found mine. "You ready?" He knelt down and began petting Cobus when he walked up to him and nuzzled his bare leg. Jake was wearing black gym shorts and a grey muscle shirt.

Layla threw open my closet door and walked out in my blue jeans and my blue PennState pullover. She had pulled her hair into a high pony as she walked past me and over to her makeup bag sitting beside her tote. "I just got to do my makeup," She hurried into the bathroom.

"Let's go grab breakfast," I smiled, taking Jake's hand in mine and leading him down the stairs. Cobus followed closely behind us. "So, who was the girl you were with last night?" I asked, taking down a box of protein bars and grabbing out some for Jake, Layla and I. I threw Jake his and tore open the wrapper on mine. I had wanted to ask Jake about this since we left the coffeehouse. He probably knew it was coming. I was a girl and I am drop dead nosey when it comes to anything. I always snoop in Jake's gym bag and Layla's purse, it's just my nature.

However, I do not snoop in peoples phones or iPods, I feel that is an invasion of privacy.

"Abbie Daniels," He smiled, opening the wrapper on his and taking a giant bite out of it as he sat down on the stool. I pulled myself onto the counter. "She's been wanting to go out for a while now,"

"Ooooooooh Jakeys got a girlfriend," I smiled widely, biting the corner of my bar. I watched Jake's cheeks blush. "So where are you taking her romeo?"

"I have no clue. I said I'd take her out tonight, but I got no plans," He huffed. "A movies to cliche, I don't know her favourite food, so I don't know where to take her," I quickly moved over beside him and sat down putting my hand overtop of his.

"Take her for a walk somewhere, maybe go to Tony's for a coffee," I offered. "Sid and I went on our first date to his hockey game and then coffee afterwards," It was the best date I've ever been on. Well... it was the only date I've ever been on. I sat in the stands, wearing one of his jerseys and cheering for him the whole time and after the game, we went out for a coffee and talked the entire night, even the walk back home to his place.

Jake stared at me, his jaw dropped open. "Let me get this straight, he makes over eight million dollars a year and he takes you to his game and then a coffee," Within a few seconds, he was doubled over from laughing.

I narrowed my eyes and jumped off the stool. "Screw you," I crossed my arms over my chest. "It may be a lame date to you, but I loved it," I loved the dates Sid and I go on. I hated flashy and he knew it, he knew better than to take me somewhere flashy. I almost cried the one day he took me to McDonalds on the way back to his house from getting his ear drained. It was sweet. I was so not used to a guy treating me nicely and taking me out to dinner.

"Holy Em," Jake put his hands up. "Chill the fuck out. I was kidding," He laughed, tossing his wrapper into the garbage on the other side of the island.

"It's not funny Jacob," I growled. "Forgive me for not wanting to be a camera hungry whore, relying on my boyfriend to pay my way in the world. Forgive me, Jacob," I wiped the fallen tear off my cheek. "I adore everything he does for me and I really don't like you dissing him," Jake narrowed his eyes.

"Let's fucking rock," Layla chimed walking down the steps, sliding her totebag up her shoulder. When Jake I remained glaring at eachother, Layla rolled her eyes. "What did I miss?" She put her hands on her hips. I moved towards the front door and opened it as Jake followed behind me, crossing his arms over his chest.
Ofcourse for the entire walk there, Layla was up our asses to figure out what had happened.

We stopped at a bench in Ferrence Park where Layla sat down and set her totebag beside her. Jake and I began doing our stretches as I looked out towards the ice rink to see people skating and a few people on the other side, further away had a makeshift net and were practicing taking shots on it.

Ferrence Park was smack dap in the middle of Buffalo's downtown core. This park was over 400 acres, had a skating rink in the winter, a large christmas tree and the whole park was decorated. There were trees all over the place and people everywhere, jogging and walking.

Some were gathering in a line infront of the ice cream vendor. Christmas was over a month away and the park was beautifully decorated for it. Lights everywhere and decorations and a giant snowman was evident on the other side of the rink.
~~
Half way through the jog, I started feeling very fatigued which was something very unusual especially for me, considering when I danced back in Sweden I jogged twice a day for almost two hours each time, was on a strict diet and trained more hours than I'll ever get back.

"Holy shit, you okay?" Jake asked, coming up to me when I had stopped once again and was doubled over, with my hands on my knees taking in deep breaths. He knelt down, taking my sweaty face in his palms. "Emily?" This wasn't like it was the first time I ever went for a jog with him, we've been running for almost a year together.

"Yeah," I huffed out, putting myself back at my rights. "I must've just pushed to hard this time," I wiped my sweaty forhead and took in another deep breath. I couldn't believe this was happening. How am I fatigued already?! We've only been running for 20 minutes.

I felt something churning in my stomach and before I knew it, my hand was over my mouth and I raced to the nearest garbage can to toss up the meek contents of my stomach into the can. I ate a protein bar this morning and Layla and I ate some ice cream before bed. Jake walked up to me and put his hand on my back. "Shit, dude, you sure you're okay?"

"I just got really tired..." I pulled a napkin from my pocket and wiped the puke off my lips and tossed it into the garbage. "It's probably my hypoglycemia acting up," I waved it off, blaming my fatigue completely on my low blood sugar. I was completely used to my headaches and lightheadedness and fatigue when I didn't eat properly.

"Guys!" Layla yelled, walking quickly up to us. Jake and I turned to face her. "I got to go, I forgot about my class, but I will call you later," Jake checked the watch on his right wrist.

"Layla, it's 8:30, your class doesn't start until 10," Layla was on the verge of leaving before turning back and glaring at him. I had no class until 5:45 this afternoon, a small lab that I already asked if I could get out of because my boyfriend was coming into town. I was a very dedicated student and always came to class, done extra credit reports so she handed me the lab and told me to have fun.

"I have to go in early, I have a quiz," Layla smiled. I had a feeling there was something else behind what she was saying. Layla never went into class early. More like twenty minutes late was early for her.

"No you don't," Jake countered. "You told me the other day you were taking notes in class today,"

"For a quiz, Jacob!" Layla growled. Jake went to open his mouth obviously to counter before Layla grabbed his arm harshly in her hand and dragged him off a few feet from me.

I couldn't make out what they were saying but I chose against trying to read their lips and sat on the bench resting a hand over my abdomen while I still felt a little fatigued. This wasn't the first time I felt fatigued and had thrown up out of the blue.

"Well whatever, bye," Jake waved over his shoulder as he walked back and sat down beside me. "Layla's gotta go 'study' for a quiz," He air quoted the word 'study' as he snooped through his phone.

"I think I'm gonna head home," I mumbled under my breath. "I feel like shit," I probably just needed to eat something, this was classic for me to feel sick to my stomach if I didn't eat enough or get lightheaded or fatigued, like I was feeling at this point. I barely ate the protein bar and I go for a 20 minute run, I was pretty much asking for a low blood sugar attack.

"NO!" Jake grabbed my hand in his to keep me from leaving. I gave him an arched eyebrow as I jerked my hand out of his grip. "I mean, not yet, we haven't even finished the run, I mean..."

"Jake, I just fucking puked in a garbage can!" I countered, tightening up my pony. "I wanna go home and take a shower and crawl back into my bed," I stepped off the bench and pulled the back of my shoe out when I began stretching out my leg muscles.

"You can't! Layla has your key!" Jake jumped off the bench and stepped infront of me.

"There's a spare under my mat, Jacob," I turned to walk back down the path as he came up behind me. "Jacob, Iam going home, so stop,"

"You could have an attack, I mean it's a 20 minute walk, you're kinda pale," Jake grabbed my arm in his. "How about we go grab breakfast first and then you can go home," I crossed my arms over my chest and took in a deep breath.

"Fine, but just breakfast," I smiled as we walked arm in arm through the park. Ben's Diner was just on the other side about five minutes away and they made the most amazing muffins I have ever tasted.

~~

Jake convinced me to go for a short run after breakfast and then his phone buzzed and like that, the run was over, he had practice and said he'd call me tomorrow. I took my hair out of my pony and skipped up the steps as I grabbed my key out from under the 'Welcome' mat and just as I was about to place it in the lock, the door swung open.

I stepped inside, unzipping my jacket and setting the key on the counter.

"Hello?" I questioned, kicking off my Zigtechs into the shoerack and setting my jacket on the counter beside the key.

I came home to my door being unlocked after I distinctly remember locking it and I reached for my hockey stick that was beside the door. I had hockey sticks and bats everywhere, for the simple fact I was a young girl living on my own in Buffalo, New York, I was on the Upper East Side, but still I was preparing for the worst.

"Holy shit," I heard his voice as his feet slammed against the steps when he came running down them. "It's about fucking time," Cobus trailed after him, with a small pink catnip mouse in his mouth. I stared in shock as the hockey stick left my hands and I jumped into his arms.

I couldn't believe he was here already. I had planned to be wearing a very nice dress, not a sports bra and a pair of yoga pants, both of which were doused in sweat and probably reeked. My house was also a fucking pigstye and I had planned to clean it before he showed up.

"Sidney, how long have you been here?" I wrapped my arms around his neck. "You weren't supposed to come until 6," I didn't want to stop the contact, I hadn't seen him in almost a month and I had been missing him like craaazy. I let my eyes travel over his muscular front beneath a black long sleeved shirt, dark blue jeans and a grey toque covering his head.

"I know," He leaned in and pecked my lips but I quickly put my hand up to block the kiss, completely against my will. "Emily, you okay?" He moved his fingers across the outline of my jaw.

"Yeah..." I quickly walked away from him and ran water into a glass before gargling it and spitting into the sink. "I just went for a run with Jake, and I didn't eat that much before I left and hurled into a garbage can," Sid took the stool at the end of the counter and looked at me with concern.

"Emily, I don't really wanna have to find you... again," He moved his dark browns to the counter as he stole one of my hands in his. I was amazed at how much bigger his hand was to mine, but how our fingers seemed to fit perfectly intertwined together. I sighed, remembering the day I found out if I didn't change my diet that I could fuck my life up and have to be on insulin everyday, to regulate my blood sugar.

I was surprising Sid for our sixth month anniverary, he had a game against the Canucks, at noon so I planned all on my own to be at his house by 10 in the morning.

It was like any other morning, I got up, showered and headed out to Sewickley in my little Jeep. I didn't stop anywhere and I didn't eat before I left. I parked my car in his driveway while I felt completely sick to my stomach and sat on his porch while I waited for him to come home and let my eyes close.

I awoke to Sid and Geno peering overtop of me, shaking me awake saying that they've been trying to wake me up for twenty minutes. Sid had carried me into his house and said my skin wasn't the right colour, I was unresponsive and my eyes were freaking him out.

So before I knew what was going on, Sid had me in his car and brought me out to the doctor, they got me in right away and the first thing the doctor checked was my blood sugar levels.

Normally ours are supposed to 5, but that day mine was 2, he said if it had dropped any more I could've went into a diabetic coma or died. He sent me to a dietician and they put me on a strict diet and a meal plan that I had to live by.

I was diagnosed with Reactive Hypoglycemia, a big name for Low Blood Sugar. He said I'm not diabetic, so I don't need insulin but my diet is definitely important in maintaining a normal life. I am still able to do everything I used to do, nothings really changed except for the fact that I can't just not eat.

"Emily?" Sid snapped his fingers in my face. I came back to reality and let my eyes focus like an iPhone going vertical at Sid's eyes starting back at me. "You alright? You were really fucking out there,"

"Yeah, sorry... I was kinda off in my own little world," I smiled, patting Sid's hand that I now noticed were tightly holding onto mine.

"What do you say we go to breakfast and catch up, my treat," Sid released my hand and got up off the stool as he grabbed his hockey bag off the ground behind the island and began going through the stuff he had placed in there.

"It's always your treat, why can't it ever be mine?" I crossed my arms over my chest. Sid instantly started laughing when he pulled his Penguins ballcap out of his bag.

I bought us coffee one time from Starbucks in Sewickley while Sid was at practice and every other time it's been Sid. I hate him buying for me, it was so degrading and I always told myself I was not going to be a moocher, I was not going to be some guys arm candy, I was going to pull my own weight.

"That just looks bad, Em," Sid smiled, resting his ballcap on the island counter when he stood up. He was not making a notion to remove his toque, that was also Penguins. He loved the Pittsburgh Penguins organization and the city of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, it was like he was meant to be there. "You buy next time,"

"I'm sure that will happen," I laughed, glancing over at him. "So, what's with the toque? You're indoors,"

He moved his hands to his head. "Oh, I uh... well, you see..." He nervously laughed as he pulled on the fabric of the toque. "Oh shit, you're gonna see it anyway," He waved it off and pulled the toque off his head, revealing shorter black hair than I remembered.

It was straight now, but if he grows it out it gets curly. I had always wondered if we ever have kids, if they'll inherit his features; the way his lips curl when he smiles, his intense brown eyes and his curly hair.

I was quick off my stool when I noticed the large gash above his left eyebrow. I moved my fingers across it, instantly hurting inside. I couldn't handle Sid with stitches and gashes because I always knew how painful it had to have been for him. The gash was dark red, about an inch in length and by the looks of it, he had a couple stitches. "Oh Sidney, what the hell happened?"

He shrugged, running his fingers through his hair. "Meh, I think I got hi-sticked or something," He brushed it off like it was nothing for that kind of thing to happen. I knew in hockey it was a rarity for one to go through an entire game without some kind of cut or injury.

I had been at the one game, it was a bad play and Sid took a slapshot right off the cheek bone behind the net. People were ofcourse being pricks and calling him a crybaby and all that crap, but honestly, you take a frozen puck off the face and tell me you could walk away without crying.

His face was swollen for a week, I thought his cheek was broke, and I was amazed at how much of a trooper he was when he went right back out on the ice after taking that hit.

"You think you got hi-sticked?" I sat down on the stool beside him and began to Mother him and tend to his eyebrow. He had a small bandaid covering the part with the stitches, but the rest of the gash was out for all the world to see.

"What? There was a scrum, I was trying to pull that prick off of Tanger and his teammate whipped around and got me in the eye with his stick, I didn't know if it was slashing or a hi-stick, I bled for a few and got stitches and came right back out," He shrugged. "But I'm all better now, so let's go, I'm starving,"

"Sidney, I stink," I sniffed at my armpit as I stood off the stool. "I atleast need a shower before we go anywhere," He instantly raised his eyebrows, wrapping both arms around my waist. "Sidney..."

"You know Em, with global warming, there are water conservation laws and might I inform you that I actually didn't shower before I left," He shared, standing off the stool. I met his collarbones. I was 5"9 and he was 5"11.

"Really? Hmm... what are we going to do about that?" I grabbed his hand in mine and led him towards the stairs.