Don't Let This Memory Fade Away

“Alex, no. Alexander!” I screeched as Alex picked up a glob of mud from the front of his house and threw it in my direction. Luckily, I dodged it just in time. I was so caught up in the fact that I had avoided it, though, that I didn’t notice him tossing another one at me. It hit me right in the chest, dripping down my shirt and seeping in. Just then, the rain that had just stopped when we had exited the school picked up again in a sudden downpour.

“You are so lucky that I love the rain. So lucky.” I shot at Alex who had become caught up in a raging fit of laughter. I rolled my eyes and headed down his driveway, pausing just before his doorstep to turn my head up to the sky. I shut my eyes and breathed in deeply, smiling as the rain embraced my skin. Thunder roared from above me, and I let all my surroundings, physical and mental, wash away, taking in what I believed to be one of the most beautiful occurrences on Earth. I felt serene, content, not caring if I were ordered to stay in this one spot for eternity.

“So, the rain is your ecstasy, huh?” Alex said as he walked up beside me.

I looked away from the sky and over to him, smiling still. “I guess you could say that.”

“It makes me upset, it’s so depressing.”

“It’s cleansing to me,” I replied “It’s all what you make of it.”

He nodded and motioned for us to go into the house. I followed reluctantly, wanting to take in as much as I could. Granted this was a normal occurrence, but the rain has always been my happy place. Once inside, I glanced back to get one more glimpse of the downpour right before the door shut behind me. I heard footsteps approaching and looked in their direction. Mrs. Gaskarth stopped, gasped, and threw her hands up.

“What were you two thinking standing outside in that! You’re going to get sick! And Farah, how did you get mud down the front of your blouse?”

I looked down at my shirt, far from what I would consider a blouse. I lifted my eyes back to her. “Thank your son for that.”

She shot Alex and angry stare. “Get her new clothes, Alexander William. Throwing mud at a pretty girl, you are not in second grade anymore! This is not how you express your affection!”

I let out a laugh, louder than I had expected, and covered my mouth with my hand. Alex rolled his eyes and walked up the stairs, mumbling under his breath on the way.

“I’m very sorry about my immature son, Farah.”

“It’s fine, Mrs. Gaskarth. Really.” I gave her a shy smile, and she returned a bigger one. I looked past her to see a figure approaching; of course, it was Daniel.

“What the hell happened to you?” He laughed.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Now come here and give me a hug.”

“Oh, no you don’t. Stay away from me.” He backed away slowly, and I lunged for him. Of course, me being clumsy old me, fell onto my stomach, knocking the wind out of me. I lay there; head spinning, trying to catch a breath, unsuccessfully so for what seemed like forever. Daniel sat me up, and thankfully, I was able to breathe.

“What happened?” I heard Alex ask from behind me.

“Grace over here fell down. Probably not the best idea to come after someone when you’re soaking wet.”

I looked up at him to see him smirking down on me. I stuck my tongue out at him as he helped me up.

“Here are some clothes. Once you’re all changed come meet me upstairs, alright?” Alex handed the pile over to me.

I nodded in reply and watched him strut away, making his way back up the stairs. Something had been up with him lately; he seemed much happier than usual and he hadn’t been making moves on me as much.

“Do you know what the deal with Alex is?” I asked Dan as I started to walk towards the bathroom.

He walked along side me. “Not anything that he’s told me, but he usually acts like this when he has a new girl in his life.”

My stomach twisted and I held my breath. “Oh.” I replied, letting the air out.

“What’s wrong? I thought you didn’t want to get involved with him.”

“I never said that.” I snapped. “I just wanted time to get to know him better.”

“Well time doesn’t work with Alex; he wants what he wants when he wants it.”

“Apparently so.” I mumbled and stepped into the bathroom. “Thanks for the info, Daniel.”

He nodded and gave me a sad look. “He’s kind of a douche, Farah. There’s better guys, you know.”

“Like who, Jack?” I laughed a little.

“Or me…” He whispered. It seemed as though he didn’t mean to say this out loud, and realizing he had, his eyes widened. “Bye.” He said quickly and moved away before I could get a word out.

I shut the bathroom door and stripped my clothes off slowly. I can’t attract a single guy back home, but I get here and half of All Time Low wants me and so does Alex’s suicidal brother.

“Oh my gosh.” I whispered. “Please do not let me be the reason for his death.”

As I pulled on Alex’s boxers, I stopped. “Get a fucking grip, don’t be so vain. There’s a lot more going on than you.” I told myself, mentally punching myself in the face for even thinking that sort of thing.

I finished dressing and collected my wet clothes into my hands. I made my way upstairs quickly. Alex was lying on his bed on the phone, smiling at the ceiling. I ducked down on the stairwell so he couldn’t see me. I wanted to hear the last bits of this conversation.

/Please only be Jack or one of the other guys. Please./

“No, stop worrying about it, beautiful. We’re just friends.” Pause. “No, not just because she isn’t interested. I’m not interested.” Pause. “Yes I promise. You’re the only thing that matters to me, okay?” Pause. “I will, Friday night at the show. You’ll see.” Pause. “Alright, I’ll see you tomorrow. Bye.”

My heart felt like it just fell out of my ass. I couldn’t believe this. Alex had truly started to grow on me, but it was all my fault. I pushed him away. I had him, and I rejected him.

I finished making my way up the stairs and walked into his room. He sat up and patted the spot next to him, inviting me. I climbed up onto his and curled up into a ball, making myself as small as possible.

“I’m sleepy.” I whispered, pulling my knees closer to my chest.

“You’re always sleepy.” He laughed, moving down so he could look me in the eyes.

“What?”

“I have something to tell you.”

“What’s that?”

“You don’t have to worry about me chasing you anymore. There’s this girl. She’s perfect.”

“Oh, really? What’s her name?” I asked, pretending to be interested.

“Amy. She’s just, wow. I don’t even know where to begin. She has the most beautiful green eyes, and this perfect brown hair. And her smile. She’s the sweetest thing. And I’ve known her like, forever, but I don’t know. We went on a date on Sunday. We just clicked.”

“Oh, so /that’s/ why you blew off Jack and I.” I said teasingly.

“Oh, shut up.”

“Well, I’m glad she makes you happy.”

“She does. She really does.”

I bit my lip and closed my eyes. I felt him wrap his arms around me and cuddle up close.

“Goodnight, sleepy head.” He whispered.