A Little's Enough

Teigann's POV

I curled into Gerard's embrace a little more once the others left for bed. It was strange that what I thought would be my worst Christmas had really become the best one I'd had since childhood. I knew there were only a couple short hours left of the night and I wanted to make sure that Gerard opened his gift before we went to sleep. I knew that what I had made was nerdy and I felt silly and even a bit shy about giving it to him. I didn't want anything in return, I just wanted to show him how much he meant. I'd had a hard time telling him out loud how grateful I was to have him- how lucky I felt.

“Sugar, are you ready for sleep too?” He asked, speaking softly before resting his lips on the crown of my head.
“Not yet.” I answered, joining our hands and intertwining our fingers. “Can we just sit like this for a minute longer though?”
He murmured a “mhmm” and we just sat quietly.

Within a few minutes my need to pee was more than I could handle and I had to break up the snuggles. “I'll be right back.” He smiled in return and butterflies seemed to flutter in my stomach. Sometimes it was just the way he looked at me that made me feel incredible, even on my worst days.

Since the bathroom was so close to his room anyways, when I was finished I went in and changed into my pyjamas really quick. I grabbed his present that I had put on his dresser earlier in the evening and decided I'd give it to him when I got back downstairs. However I held off when I entered the living room again, seeing Gerard pacing the floor.

“What's wrong?” I asked, instantly worried.
“Nothing. Everything is fine, I swear.” He weakly smiled back at me.
“I'm not convinced love.” I put down his parcel on the table and went to him, wrapping my arms around him.
“Sorry, I'm just overthinking things. I'm okay, really. Everything is okay.”

I believed him, he'd never given me a reason not to. “What has you thinking so hard?” I smiled at him.
“Your gift.” He gave a nervous smile in return.
I was a little confused, but didn't push any further.

“I seem to have this habit of giving you really forward gifts, and maybe they are too much or I give them to you too early on. But really that's not the problem I guess. I'm really just worried that you won't like it or that you'll think I'm fucking nuts or something.” He rambled on, not leaving a second for me to cut in. “Anyone else would think I'm completely crazy.”

“Well then I guess it's a good thing I'm me.” I couldn't help but smile at him. “I know we aren't very traditional in the way some couples are. But that's something I love about us. Plus, you didn't have to do anything for me at all. I will love whatever it is, because you have clearly put a lot of thought into it if it's making you this worried.”

I had to admit that my heart was racing, and I was getting the slightest bit nervous myself. The anticipation of finding out what was on his mind quickly began to eat away at me. He lead me back to the couch and sat me down, sitting down on the very edge of the seat next to me.

He seemed too nervous to look me directly in the eye. “I'm nuts for this, or at least I'm assuming you'll think I'm nuts for this. But it's just that things were pretty shitty before you came along. I mean, I never had that bad of a life. I was never happy though. Not really. Then one night I walk out of my bathroom half naked and find you sitting there, looking so beautiful, and so sad. I recognized that feeling, I'd felt that way for so long. Immediately I wanted to change that for you. Which is strange, you know? I don't think its the most natural thing to want to make everything better for a complete stranger, but it was completely natural with you. We talked, and in no time I felt like I'd known you my entire life. I didn't want you to feel lonely, and I finally didn't feel lonely with you around.”
He briefly made eye contact, running a hand up through his hair. “I didn't want that feeling to end. I still don't.”

Grasping my hands with his own he looked up into my eyes, this time with more confidence. “Teigann I know that this is early, and we really have no clue how this is going to turn out. We can't possibly know the outcome. All I can promise you is that I'll always do my best to make you happy and keep you safe. I can promise to love you, because I'm certain that it's not something I can stop doing.”

I got a little bit choked up, but let him continue without interruption.
“I guess in a way this is kind of like a marriage proposal, but I don't want it to be that. Not that I can't imagine marrying you, because I can. It's just that being engaged, it seems like this big scary amount of pressure. I don't want you to have to promise anything. Okay, maybe I just want you to promise you'll be honest if ever you lose the feelings you have for me. Yeah, that's all I want you to promise me.” He breathed shakily. “I don't want to put you under any pressure. Like I said, you can tell me I'm fucking nuts.”

I stopped him there. Pressing my lips to his, wrapping my arms around his neck for a moment, I gave him a moment to calm down.
“Gee, I'm fucking nuts too. Maybe we're both insane, but who cares?” I smiled brightly up at him, overjoyed and terrified all at once. I wasn't scared of the idea of being engaged. I was scared to death that I would fuck it up. “My answer would be yes, if you were asking.”
“Are you sure?” He looked a little shocked, but pleased by the fact I had taken him seriously.
“I'm sure.”

I was scared, but I was confident that this could be amazing.
“I hope you don't mind that yours isn't as grand a gesture.” I laughed a little. “But since I got mine, you need to open yours.”
“I'm not quite finished.” He blushed just slightly. “We might need to get it resized for you. It was Grandma Elena's, she says she better meet you soon.” He laughed a bit at this.

Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a small band of silver, detailed with small swirls surrounding a small mother of pearl stone. He placed it on my hand, and to my surprise it fit like it was made for me.
The tears that had welled up slipped past my lids and I brushed at them hastily. Even though they were happy tears, I still didn't want to shed too many of them.

“Okay, now I'll open mine.” He beamed at me.
I kissed him once more, for a minute longer this time before handing him his parcel. “Keep in mind that compared to this,” I held out my hand, “this sucks.” I finished by pointing to the book in his lap.

He fingered over the pages gently, looking over each page slowly as to take in all the sentimental stuff I had thrown in while making it. He smiled softly at me when he got to the end.
“This does not suck.”