We're Complete Opposites But I Still Love You

When I looked at the results I dropped like a rock.
I dropped to the ground crying.
Sobbing.
This can't be.
No.
Dad would be so fucking disappointed in me.
Jason came running in and looked for himself.
He backed away and ran.
Of course he would.
He didn't need this.
He didn't need to deal with a kid.
He had a full ride scholarship to the university for football.
He can't give that up.
I wasn't going to college.
I mean I was but for art.
I laid on the floor and cried.
I hadn't cried so much in my life.
Not when I was bullied.
Not even at dad's funeral.
What the fuck was I going to do...

"I'm sorry I failed you daddy...I'm so fucking sorry." I whispered.

A thought came to my mind.
Suicide.
That way Jason won't have to deal with a pregnant whore.
I rushed to stand up.
I searched through the bathroom for that damn razor I hid away so many months ago.
I walked into my bedroom and searched through every damn drawer.
Every pocket.
Every bag.
Then I remembered.
Under the bathroom sink...
I ran in there and found it.
I put it on the counter and went into my bedroom and grabbed paper and a pen.
My suicide note.

Dear Sam and Jason,
By the time you get this i'll already be dead or on the brink of death. I want to say how thankful I am for you taking me into your lovely home. I'm sure Dad appreciated that. I also want to say how sorry I am for putting you through this. For you finding me. I'm so terribly sorry. The reason for my decision to end my life? Pregnancy. Yes, I was pregnant. Jason, I'm sorry I did that to you. I know you didn't need to deal with that. Sam, I took off the pressure and stress. Jason I didn't take your future of going to University away from you. I took away the problem. Thank you for dealing with me. Don't remember me as troubled. Remember me as happy and cheerful. Jason, I love you.
Sincerely, Teal.

I set the note on the counter and picked up the razor.
I slid to the floor as the tears slid out.
I pressed the razor to my left wrist with shaking hands.
I had to do it.
For Jason.
And Sam...
I was destined to go this way.
For what i've gone through.
It was a given.
I drug the razor across pressing it into my skin as hard as I possibly could and watched as the scarlet red blood seeped out and down my arm.
I felt free.
Like nothing could hurt me.
Like I wasn't pregnant and stressed and hurting and broken anymore.
This was how it was meant to be....
Right?