Bittersweet Memories

My phone rang as it sat on the passengers seat in my car. I saw Damon's name flash on the screen and debated if I should answer or not. Well, if I don't pick up, he'll most likely keep calling back. I quickly grabbed it and decided to answer. "Damon, not now. It's not a good time."

"Klaus is dead. Alaric staked him."

I fell silent, unable to say anything. My eyes started to fill up with tears and I could hardly see the road in front of me. Klaus is dead. I never thought I'd see him again after his heart was stopped, but I had the thought in the back of my mind that maybe one day I would. Maybe I will, it's only a matter of time before me and my friends die too. "How long do we have?"

"I don't know." Damon said, I could hear it in his voice. He's crying, shedding actual tears. "It took Sage an hour before she started feeling the effects."

"Do you feel anything?" I asked him, I was starting to panic. I'm not ready to die, not yet. When I said goodbye to everybody, I told them I'd be back to see them soon. I at least need a proper goodbye! "I don't feel anything. Oh god, I'm not ready for this."

"I feel fine. Relax, Savannah, maybe Klaus was lying so we wouldn't kill him, maybe we come from one of the others."

"NO!" I yelled, still crying, still trying to see the road. I decided it was best if I just pulled over and parked. Not that I was worried about killing myself, I'm already dying. I wouldn't wanna cause an accident though, and kill somebody else. "Klaus told me he's the one, he wouldn't of lied to me."

"I'm sorry about him." Damon said. "I am."

"Save it, Damon. We're dying, at least be honest with me. I don't need your fake sympathy."

"You want me to be honest with you? Fine. Whatever you do, don't hang up on me." Damon said and I braced myself for whatever he was about to tell me. "I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry too, Damon."

"No. You have nothing to be sorry about, it's all on me. I'm sorry for everything I ever put you through. Everything that ever happened between us, it's my fault. I am so sorry for driving you away, right into Klaus' arms. I'm sorry for Katherine, for her almost killing you, I'm sorry about Elena and not giving you the time and attention you deserved. I'm sorry for stringing you along while I still loved Katherine. I'm incredibly sorry for every ounce of pain I ever caused you. I'm sorry I couldn't be the man you wanted me to be, the man you deserved. Because, Savannah, you deserved so much better than me. Most of all, I'm sorry for turning you. You didn't deserve this life, if It wasn't for me you'd be safe right now."

"Damon, stop." I sobbed, now crying myself. "You don't have to do this. You don't have to spend your last moments apologizing, you should just call Stefan."

"If these are the last moments I have, I want to spend them apologizing to you. If you have to die, you deserve to know how I feel about you, you deserve to know that I carry the guilt around with me everyday for what I've done to you. I would say I regret falling in love with you, but that would be a lie. You made me a better person, Sav. I am the best version of myself and it's all because of you. If I had the chance to make things right between us and be the boyfriend you deserve, I'd take it in a heartbeat. Lastly, you need to know that I love you, Savannah. I'm still in love with you and I have been all this time. I'll never stop."

I sat in the drivers seat of my car, crying my eyes out. Not only because Klaus was dead, or because I was dying, but Damon pouring his heart out to me really screwed up my emotions. He gave me the truth, I might as well do the same. I am dying, after all. "I guess this is my payback for faking my death in the first place. Now I'm dying for real, the universe works in mysterious ways."

"This is not your payback, Savannah."

"I spent so much time trying to hate you, trying to conjure up ways to make your life a living hell for what you did to me. The more I tried to hate you, the more I realized I couldn't." I slightly laughed. "I finally realized that I still loved you and it wasn't going away just because I wanted it to. I mean really, how could I hate the man I died for?"

"You should hate me." Damon said.

"But I don't. Just because I'm not crazy in love with you anymore, doesn't mean I don't love you, because I do. I love you and I forgive you." I confessed. "You should call Stefan now, say your goodbyes, tell the others."

"Are you gonna be okay?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine." I lied. "I'm not too far from Mystic Falls, I'm gonna try to make it home so I can say goodbye to Caroline and Tyler. Will you be okay?"

"Of course." Damon forced a laugh. "You know me, Savannah, I'll be fine."

"I'm really glad you called. At least we can die knowing how the other feels. Goodbye, Damon."

"Goodbye, Savannah."

I hung up the phone and turned my car around, hoping to make it home before we all start keeling over. Hopefully Tyler and Caroline haven't left town yet, the three of us were supposed to be long gone by now. Before I knew it I was almost home and my phone was going off again. It was Caroline calling, I was almost afraid to answer, expecting the worse. I could hear her sobbing on the other end, she wouldn't say a word to me. "Care?"

"Its Tyler. Tyler's dead, Savannah. He's dead!"

My heart fell into my stomach. Expect the worst and you get the worst. I just wanted to scream, but I couldn't. I had to be strong for Caroline, no matter how hurt I am right now. Now I really know how all my friends felt when I faked my death. Just the mere thought of Tyler being dead is starting to eat me up inside and I have no idea what to do. My eyes were swelling up again for the forth time tonight, I swallowed the lump in my throat as I tried to speak. "Just…just hang on, Care. I'll be there in ten minutes."

I hung up the phone and slammed it on the dashboard. Then I started hitting the steering wheel, over and over again. I screamed at the top of my lungs for Tyler. So this is what it feels like to lose a friend and I didn't even get to say goodbye. When I arrived to town, I knew just where to find Caroline. She was in the woods talking to Stefan. I tried to hide the fact that I spent the whole car ride crying my eyes out as I approached them.

"Savannah.." Stefan started, pulling me off to the side before I could get the chance to speak to Caroline. This fucker better not make me cry next. "I take it you talked to my brother."

"I did." I nodded my head. "Closure is good in times like these."

Unexpectedly, Stefan pulled me in for a tight hug. "I don't even know what to say to you right now-"

"If its about Klaus, save it. I know your history with him, I know what he's done to Elena. I don't want you apologizing to me for stopping his heart, you did what you did for a reason. I get it, and it sucks, but I get it."

"You know it had nothing to do with you, I'm sorry you got hurt."

"And now Klaus is dead and we're all going with him, only a matter of time now." I said. "Thank you, Stefan."

"For what?" Stefan asked, a bit confused.

"For being you." I smiled as a tear slipped down my face. "You're one of the kindest and pure hearted people I've ever met, I'm proud to call you a friend. You're one of the good ones, Stef. That's what I always admired about you."

"We may see things differently from time to time, but I'm proud to call you a friend too. Since we're all going to hell, I guess I'll see you soon?" Stefan laughed. "Listen, Elena's on her way home, hopefully she makes it back before ya know… maybe we should all be together."

"No." I protested. "That's not a good idea, Stefan. The two of you should be together, just tell her I love her, okay?"

Stefan nodded his head and kissed my forehead before disappearing. "Goodbye, Sav."

I ran over to Caroline and hugged her tight. She wasn't crying anymore but she was different. Like she was numb to the whole situation. She finally spoke. "I don't wanna talk about Tyler."

"Okay, we won't." I said quietly. "If we're going out, we're going out together, remember?"

"Together." She agreed.

"Come on." I said pulling her over to my car. "If we have to die, we're gonna die our way."

We drove the short distance to the football field. This was basically home to Caroline and I for the whole of our high school lives. I grabbed the bottle of bourbon I had stashed in the back seat of my car and we laid on the wet grass just drinking our fears away. I was lightly shedding some tears, I knew Caroline was too, but I ignored it for her own sake.

"I'm sorry about Tyler." I said

"I'm sorry about Klaus….and Damon."

I looked over at her and smirked a bit. "He called me tonight, ya know."

"What happened?" Caroline asked, passing the bottle back to me.

"We cried and told each other the truth. He apologized for everything, finally admitting it was all his fault. Then he told me he was still in love with me and always will be." I passed the bottle back after taking a huge swig.

"And you said what?!"

"I forgave him and told him I loved him."

"I guess the truth comes out when you're dying." Caroline grinned. "Do you feel anything yet?"

"No. You?"

"No." She said, passing the bottle back. "Remember when we used to come here after football games and get drunk?"

I smiled to myself, we did that a lot. Caroline, Elena, Bonnie and I. "Remember when Elena almost got us all arrested for underage drinking? Screaming her head off because she was paranoid about werewolves coming to eat us?"

"HA!" Caroline laughed. "Oh, the irony! I used to be jealous of you, ya know."

"Jealous?! I laughed. "Caroline Forbes jealous of me? For what!"

"You know, back then I didn't have the confidence I have now. I was never sure of myself and my best friend had it all." Caroline confessed. "Cute, happy, rich family. Head cheerleader dating the hot quarterback. Your parents talked about marrying the two of you off, and there I was, going through boyfriends left and right."

I couldn't help but laugh at her. "Tyler was a prick when we dated and our parents were delusional." I said. "Sure, I might of had it all. Then my parents divorced, my father started dating a 26 year old and we were talk of the town. Tyler cheated on me, I met Damon Salvatore and he ruined my life."

It was all so comical to me now and the two of us couldn't help but laugh. "Well…when you put it that way."

"Give me the bottle back, bitch." I snatched it away and started downing it. "Do you think theres an afterlife for us vampires?"

"I'd like to think so." Caroline said. "Then we'd all be together again, well, most of us. I'll have Tyler back, and I sense a love triangle in your future."

"Oh, here we go." I shoved the bottle in her face. "No love triangles for me."

"Who would you pick? If you were faced with the choice between Klaus or Damon, who would you pick?"

My mind started racing at the question, I racked my brain looking for an answer, even though its probably been there all along. I actually thought I was finally starting to die, but it was just the liquor setting in, make my head clouded. I was drunk. "Before Klaus was desiccated, we were gonna leave Mystic Falls together. I wanted to be with him and I told him I'd go anywhere with him."

Caroline rolled over on her stomach so she could fully look at me. "Savannah Cunningham, I believe you're drunk."

"I'm not drunk." I laughed. "Okay, I am. But I wasn't drunk when I told him. I was ready to go with him, away from all this shit and give it a real go."

"You guys really did care about each other." She said. "I didn't think that was possible for Klaus."

"You'd be surprised." I laughed. "I just wanted to give us a real chance without being caught in the middle of all the drama. Now I'll never know…"

"Savannah! You're crying! NO!" Caroline sat up, pulling me along with her. She held me in her arms as I tried to stop. God, it's been an emotional day. "What's happened to us, it isn't fair. This whole thing is my fault."

"What? Caroline, how could you blame yourself?" I questioned her. "This isn't your fault."

"It is, Savannah." She said. "If I hadn't of opened my big mouth and hinted that Alaric's life was linked to Elena's, Klaus would of never went after her. Stefan would of never stopped his heart, Damon wouldn't of had his body and allowed Alaric to kill him in the first place. The two of you would of been long gone by now and happy together, and we wouldn't be waiting to die right now!"

"You listen to me, Caroline Forbes. NONE of what's happening to us is your fault. It isn't anybody's fault!" I said. "Esther has been hell bent on destroying her children, if it hadn't been tonight, it would of happened eventually. There was no way you or me, or anybody else could of stopped this."

"But-"

"But nothing. We're all vampires, we've upset the balance of nature and we're not supposed to be here. Despite how good some of us are, it's wrong for us to be what we are. We should of been dead as soon as our mortal lives ended." I said. "This whole dying thing is taking too long. Maybe you should go say goodbye to your mother."

"And leave you alone? No way!"

"Caroline, it's your mom." I insisted. "i'll be fine. Besides, one of us might go first and I don't think either of us want to watch the other die."

"Are you gonna see your family?" She asked

I shook my head. "No. I decided its best if they don't have to relive losing me again. I already said goodbye when I was leaving town, its better this way. I just want them to believe I'm somewhere I love and I'm happy."

"You're sure you'll be okay?"

"I'll be fine." I told her as the two of us stood up, going in for another hug. "I love you, Carebear. Now go."

"I love you, too."

I laid back down on the football field for what seemed like forever. I checked the time periodically and the clock was ticking slowly. I wasted the time thinking about my life and all the choices I made. Thinking about everything that has lead to my impending death. I was almost beginning to think Klaus wasn't the one we were all descended from. Waiting to die is a bitch. My mind eventually wandered to Tyler. I hated myself for how broken he was over my fake death. Now he's really dead and I didn't get a chance to say goodbye, I didn't get to tell him I love him. I picked up the nearly empty bottle of liquor from the ground and drank the last of it.

"Tyler, this is for you buddy!" I said out loud, hoping he was somehow listening. The sound of my phone going off scared the hell out of me. I dug in my pocket for it and saw Stefan's name flashing on the screen. He's obviously still alive as well and calling to tell me Klaus is full of shit, no doubt. "I take it you're still alive, too."

"Savannah." Stefan's voice was urgent and sad. "Somethings happened."

I quickly sat up and tried to get ahold of myself as my head started to spin. "What's wrong, Stefan?"

"It's Elena. I need…I need you to come to the hospital. Now."

I hung up the phone and collected myself. Why I had a sudden interest in Elena, I don't know. But I listened to Stefan and ran to the hospital as fast as I could. I quickly pushed through the doors and ran into Meredith in the process, she had a mortified look on her face. "Where's Elena and Stefan?"

"Savannah-"

"I'm not opposed to killing one more human before I die. I'm not gonna ask you again." I said sternly, a real threat slipping through my lips. She told me where they were and I wasted no time going to them. When I opened the door, I saw Stefan sitting at Elena's bedside, crying. Only she wasn't hooked up to machines or anything, she was just lying there. Lifeless. I couldn't hear her heart beating, she wasn't breathing. A rush of tears started to flood my eyes and my hand went over my mouth when I realized what happened. "Oh my god."



I stood back and stared at the two of them, not knowing what to do or say to Stefan. Then I slowly walked over to Stefan's side and gave his shoulder a tight squeeze. I couldn't take my eyes off Elena's lifeless body. I couldn't believe it, I refused to believe she was dead. No, how did this happen? We were all supposed to die, not her! All of my ill feelings about her flew out the window as soon as I saw her. At that moment I didn't give a shit about everything that happened between us, we were supposed to eventually get past everything and go back to being friends. I crouched down to Stefan's level and gave him a hug. He was visibly broken and I hated seeing him this way.

"I was supposed to protect her, Savannah. Now…now she's-"

"This isn't your fault, Stefan." I told him. "If Elena's…dead…I know you did everything you possibly could. Do not blame yourself."

"But she's not dead."

I looked him in the face. He must still be stuck in the denial stage. Elena's my oldest friend but I'm not blind, she's lying there without a heartbeat. I had to ask what he was talking about anyway. "What?"

"She's transitioning."

Stefan buried his face in his hands and I tightly wrapped my arms around him, pulling him down so he can cry on my lap. I've never seen him this broken up before, it was heartbreaking to even look at him. I lightly ran my fingers against his scalp, trying to soothe him as he sobbed. "Shhh…it's gonna be okay, Stefan. It'll be okay."

"She didn't want this!" He yelled. "This is the last thing she wanted, to be a vampire!"

We both lost people today. I lost Klaus and Tyler, and Stefan lost Elena's mortal life. I sat there comforting Stefan in silence, all while I stared at Elena's lifeless body and cried myself. I was so sure I hated her and didn't care about her life at all, that was until I saw her transitioning into becoming the one thing she feared the most. I felt a presence behind me and I turned back at the door. It was Damon there, staring at the scene before him. His face was hard as a rock and I looked at him with sympathy. It doesn't matter if he told me he's still in love with me, there's no denying that he loves Elena too.

Jeremy appeared behind him and he ran into the room, crying and hugging Elena's lifeless body.

"Come on, Stefan. Let's give Jeremy some space." I said, trying to get him to stand up. He finally agreed and walked out of the room with Damon following behind us. "I should go, are you guys gonna be okay?"

"Maybe you shouldn't leave yet." Stefan said. "Alaric may be dead, but the council still knows you're a vampire."

"I'll be careful." I assured him before giving him a hug. "If you need anything, don't hesitate to call me."

I gave Damon a nod before going to walk away. "Savannah, wait!"

I turned around and came face to face with him. "You should go comfort Stefan, he needs you. It looks like you need him too."

"I love Elena."

Boy, I sure wasn't expecting that to come out of his mouth. "I know, Damon. I've known longer than you have."

"But I love you, too."

I gave him a small smile and reached up to stroke his face. "I know you do. But you can't love us both, it's not fair. You're just gonna have to forget about me, okay?"

"But I can't just forget about you."

I wanted to be mean and say something along the lines of him forgetting me when I actually was his girlfriend, but I decided against it. Given the day we all had, the last thing I want is yet another argument with Damon. "You're gonna have to, Damon. I love Klaus."

He tightly pressed his lips together and looked down in disappointment. Now, I didn't love Klaus, I still wasn't sure how I felt about him. I wasn't in love with him or anything, but my feelings for him were undeniable and very, very deep. I believe I could of loved him, if we had more time together. Now I'll never know. Klaus is gone but going back to Damon isn't an option. The look on his face showed he was hurt by my words, that was the plan. It wasn't to cause him pain, but to have him realize there's no hope for us. I gave him a hug before leaving and returning to the Mikaelson home where Elijah and Rebekah were.

I walked into the living room where the two of them were talking by the fire.

"Why am I still alive?" I questioned them. "Stefan and Damon, they're still alive too."

"We don't know." Elijah said. "What are you even doing here?"

"When I heard Nik was killed by Alaric, I rushed back to be with Caroline." I said. "That was two hours ago and I'm still alive."

"We're sure you and the others don't come from either of our bloodlines." Rebekah said. "Kol was sure as well."

"That means somehow, someway, Klaus is still alive." I said. "Right?"

"I believe so." Elijah said. "But how?"

The room fell silent for a while. I decided to stick around a bit after all, at least for a little while. If Klaus is somehow still alive, maybe there's a good chance he'll come back soon. Then we can leave together, just like we planned.